This episode would have you believe that two former friends are on a collision course, and poor Narumi is caught perilously inbetween, but god, could this episode have been any less exciting? As always, I like to single out a particular scene in a film or episode that is a microcosm of the bigger picture. This moment for the sixth episode of “Kamisama no Memo-chou” comes around the nine minute mark. Alice visits the Hirasaki headquarters to confirm the identity of last week’s perpetrator. Yondaime warns her, however, that the thief “[has] been beaten to a pulp, enough to make you faint ten times, and then some.” Wow, that sounds serious! Well, let’s have a look at him then.

So, uh, that was a letdown. Is it possible that Yondaime was only putting up a front to scare Alice away? Maybe, but then one of his henchmen says: “What do we do? Should we kill him and bury him in the mountains?” The henchman doesn’t sound like he’s joking around, so I think the words in the anime are serious. Unfortunately, the actions are not. And because the characters’ actions don’t line up with their own words, there’s an awkward impotency in the anime.

Narumi: “It made me realize that I’m all talk.”

Narumi is so ineffectual that even he’s starting to gain some sense of self-awareness of his own shortcomings. To compound matters, it’s not just Narumi who is dull. Should there end up being a showdown between Renji and Yondaime, it would just be one baby-faced softy against another baby-faced softy. If Narumi’s a piece of white bread, these guys are barely toast — it’s a step up but hardly. Unfortunately, they are supposed to be gang leaders, but that’s the thing… the anime constantly tells us — with words — that something serious is about to go down, but seemingly fails to back up any of its claims every single time. Talk is cheap.

When Yondaime tells Narumi that there’s something fishy about the club gig, I expect more than an offscreen break-in and a montage of bros shopping for clothes (see: episode five). When Renji tells Narumi to stay away from some club because it’s dangerous, I expect more than a small fire we don’t even get to see. When Yondaime says that the thief has been beaten to a bloody pulp, I expect to see some actual brutality — y’know, to give Yondaime a sense of threat. Unfortunately, like Narumi, the anime’s all talk. Eventually, “Kamisama no Memo-chou” is going to get “The Boy Who Cried Wolf” treatment: when something interesting finally does happen, will anyone even believe the show anymore?

Somehow, however, “Kamisama no Memo-chou’s” failings just seem so apropos when one considers its heroine’s “occupation.” Alice sits before her many computer screens every single day, reading words and looking at pictures of the real world instead of actually experiencing it. She barely has any real friends; her companions are usually stuffed animals. There are some striking overlaps between “Kamisama no Memo-chou” and “Dantalian no Shoka.” Both shows heavily play up the power of representation, but I don’t think either series succeeds in doing so. Alice tells us that she has a mission, but how can you really combat all the suffering in the world, when all you do is read about it from the comfort of your own home? You haven’t lived it; you don’t even know what it is.

Everything else
About the only thing “Kamisama no Memo-chou” delivers on is the latest iteration of “How to court a tsunderekko.” Even then, we’re not really sure what Narumi has done to make Alice blush bright red so often these days; he is white bread, after all.

To be honest, there’s actually more going on between Narumi and all the other male characters in the show than he and Alice. Narumi and his bros actually, y’know, have conversations and do stuff together — those are kind of like pre-requisites to most relationships. But I suppose that if you’re after the heart of a child, doing laundry and fetching soda might just do the trick. After all, this is J.C. Staff and they should be the experts.