Who knew it’d be so easy to take down a near max-level badass like Kirito?
Plot summary: Leafa and Kirito are in the middle of the Lugru Corridor when the former gets a mysterious message from Recon. Then, a group from the Salamander race attacks our pair. At first, Kirito struggles to fight them off, but he somehow turns into a giant fucking goat and murders all but one of them. When he and Leafa finally reach town, Leafa logs out for a moment to check up on Recon. She learns that Sigurd plans to betray the Sylphs, and as a result, she has to go stop her former group leader. For some reason, Kirito feels he should help out too.
Notes:
• Again with this nonsense about illusions not being helpful in combat! C’mon son, play some real MMOs!
• Not sure why Leafa’s being such a bitch about Spriggan magic though. Is this some sort of reverse-negging?
• In the middle of their trip through the cave, Leafa gets a message. So you can send and receive messages. Now, why would that be important…?
Recon runs all the way up the tower to whine about how Leafa didn’t say goodbye to him before leaving. Again, do these games not have /tells or instant messaging of some sort?
Hmmm.
• Leafa mutters a spell and creates a fake rock wall to conceal their position. Hey, guess what? You can use a spell like this to gank people. Gee, I guess illusions are pretty useful in combat after all…
• This cave has a dearth of zubats. But seriously, there sure is a convenient lack of random monsters in this cave. What’s the cave even for? Nevermind, apparently the high-level monsters are in the water… where nobody would go…
• Kirito: “Leafa, it isn’t that I don’t trust your skills as a swordsman. But could you handle support from here.” Haha, this is what every guy says to a girl when they play online games. Yah, yah, we should play ‘X’ together, but you be support and I’ll be the DPS/carry! Wait, what do you mean you don’t want to play?!
• Kirito: “I want you to stay in the back and heal me. That way I can fight harder.” AHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I can’t breathe, man. This. Is. Literally. Every. Guy. Be my healbot, babe!
• Oh Leafa, even though she does competitive kendo in real life — even though she’s been playing Alfheim Online way longer than Kirito — she just smiles and nods. Way to go, girl. Rawr rawr, fight the power!
• She literally has to step back! Even though Kirito charges forward anyway!
• Heh, the enemy is tank-and-spanking Kirito. Way to be done in by basic MMO strategy 101. You’d think with his high level and super speed, he could just run around the clunky, phalanx formation that the frontline Salamanders are employing.
• Typical tryhard tank:
The best part comes right after he utters those words. Leafa gets all glassy-eyed, puts her delicate hand to her chest, and does this half-grunt, half-moan:
“Uguu, your foolish heroism makes me so wet!”
• Hey. Hey. Where have I seen this screenshot before?
…hm. Hmmmmmmmm…
• Yeah, if you scream harder, your hits will be harder too.
• At one point, Leafa and Yui stare at each for precious seconds before deciding what to do.
• So Kirito turns into a giant goatman and demolishes the enemy. I always knew he was Satan incarnate. Seriously though, he tries to snap the last guy’s neck. I know it’s an MMO and all, but that’s fucked up. But when Leafa tells Kirito to spare the last guy’s life, Kirito suddenly becomes all buddy buddy with the enemy. Uh… sorry for trying to snap your virtual neck, bro?
• So why is it that Kirito could turn into a giant goat again? From his conversation with Leafa following the battle, it doesn’t sound like your typical illusion spell. Oh, don’t tell me he’s special in Alfheim Online too and thus have exclusive access to overpowered abilities.
• Then out of nowhere, Kirito bites Leafa. He better hopes Asuna isn’t the jealous type.
• I still think it’s dumb that your character’s body persists in-game for such a long period of time after you log out. That’s just really archaic game design for no reason whatsoever.
• Recon doin’ some reconning. Poor guy though. He’s paralyzed and trapped in the sewers. Isn’t this a form of griefing? Aren’t there GMs to prevent PVP combatants from literally taking people’s avatars prisoners?
• Leafa: “And I may not be able to return here…” Because…? In the previous game, you could die! Missions were actually dangerous. Presumably, Leafa’s going to go stop Sigurd, and she may fail as a result. But, uh, so what? Why can’t you return to help Kirito with his quest, win or lose? For an MMO, this doesn’t make any sense.
• But even though Kirito has to save Asuna within a certain time limit or she gets married off to some creepy asshole, he doesn’t even hesitate to help Leafa with some fantasy, in-game politics that doesn’t have any real life consequences. Good boyfriend.
• Oh no, the winning side will be able to levy virtual taxes and steal my hard-earned e-currency! Goddamn Barack Ebummer and his socialist agenda! It’s okay; my soon-to-be-NTR’d e-waifu can wait. I need to help online players with this gross injustice first! No taxation without representation!
• Kirito: “There are things you have to protect especially because it’s a virtual world.” Wut.
• Kirito: “I learned that from someone important.” Yeah, maybe you should save that important someone before getting involved in an MMO war of no consequence.
• Oh, sure, now there are random monsters.
• Good thing the path to the exit is just one straight line.
Alfheim Online learned from the very best: Final Fantasy XIII.
The one thing that was eating at me the whole time was….Okay. They blocked the bridge. USE YOUR WINGS, MAYBE?! No one even mentioned that once.
I think, like Aion, you can only fly in designated areas… and thus a cave is probably not one of those areas.
I’d just think they’d at least try to explain it away when they were trapped on the bridge over the lake. All it would take would be two lines to make it a little more realistic, but then again…why even bother. They just conveniently needed to be ambushed so that Kirito could puff out his own chest more…And turn into a monster, of course. Shounen law of instantly mastering powers wins again.
There are lots of things about the game mechanics that really don’t make all that much sense. The enemies could erect a giant earth wall that even Kirito can’t penetrate… so why didn’t they erect another wall between him and Leafa to prevent Kirito from getting healed?
It takes some amazingly dedicated RP-ers to meet co-conspirators in-game, or even to meet (with an honor guard no less) for signing a treaty.
And Kirito sure is attracted to attacking shields instead of players. If this were WoW, he’d be every DPS ever, too busy mashing buttons to move out of the fire or notice the secondary targets providing the boss’s invulnerability.
If MMO players were this dedicated to authenticity, WoW wouldn’t be the only mainstream title out there.
No time, gotta pull off my rotation that is only feasible against a dummy.
About the goat monster, the tactic used here is to make tanks break formation through scare. Kirito probably kept the same (and absurdly godlike) attack power and only changed his reach. After all, a fully blocked attack got 1/3 of the tanks’ HP, so a non blocked one would probably OS them.
Actually in my current MMO, EVE Online, those scares tactics are used at a strategic level with war propaganda like that one http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZNn3GDBLyFc
In EVE, when one side is getting their ass kicked a few time by some demonstration of power, or if they think they already lost the war, they failcascade and that last war shown in the video just got the attacker to steamroll the defender under a week instead of months, preatty much through the power of scare.
I know what the goat illusion did. It’s just that the only spell we’ve seen Kirito cast thus far is “Night Vision,” but all of a sudden, he can transform into a big fuck-off goat. I knew his parameters carried over from SAO, but I didn’t know this also meant access to every single spell available to his race. Typically, you have to learn spells in MMOs, either from a trainer or a scroll.
Reading your post is soooo entertaining. SAO uses sexism all over the place once again. Yet, there are some people out there who denied this.
I remembered the time when i chose the knight class in Ragnarok Online. Many other players think I am dude playing female avatar. And I didn’t bother to explain the truth to them. Hah. Oh yes, little boys, girls are supposed to be acolyte/priest, and cower behind your back.
I wonder what role Asuna’s gonna play if and when she’s free. Ah, who am I kidding? They’ll both mainheal!
She’s undine, a water elemental user. Yup, another support for our Jesus.
:-)
Hey, even better! An ewaifu who can get wet on command!
Kind of a silly question, but would you like playing a virtual reality MMO like this (or SAO)? Personally, I think it would be damn fun. I’d take it any day.
I have to be in a safe area to log out? I can be ganked and kept prisoner by the enemy forces? If they take over my area, they can steal my money? Nah, this MMO blows.
Now I profess to not being overly familiar with MMORPG’s, but what sort of illusion spell literally turns you into a monster that can pierce enemies with their claws, or bite heads off? You might want to change the classification, guys!
Kirito: “If you give into your impulses online, the price is that it changes your personality in real world”
Does it? Does it really? For a show that’s presented as full-on nerdy wish-fulfilment, promoting the idea that MMORPG’s are for cool kids, Kirito suddenly sounds like one of those moronic anti-game politicians claiming Grand Theft Auto will turn children into violent sociopaths. I knew I should have been nicer in Fallout 3. It’s too late for me!
I think it’s more that Kirito could kill them in one hit if they didn’t block… it’s just stupid that the tanks broke formation. I mean, at least take a hit first to see whether or not you can survive it. After all, death isn’t permanent so I don’t know why the tanks would be so scared that they’d try to run.
Goddamn I cracked up reading this. The whole “illusion magic isn’t useful in battles” thing was getting to me too. Not useful in battles my ass, he just wiped out 11 people like it was nothing when he was barely scratching them before. Though, if he’d only side-stepped the shield dudes and gone for the casters he wouldn’t have needed to go all Satan-Goat at all.
I also almost laughed out loud when he said: “Sorry, that sounded really arrogant, right? It’s a bad habit.” A rare moment of self-awareness. Then she went all doki-doki because he didn’t kill her. Ooh, not killing me where I stand for meagre personal gain, what a man!
I mean, it’s just common sense! You mean misdirection can sow confusion in the enemy, thereby allowing you to have the upper hand? Naaaaah.
All of a sudden, he has no agility. He can only charge people head on.
Nice, mate, but you forgot to mention that, after Kirito’s line of “Gotta protect the virtual shizznit, especially cause it’s fake”, he says:
“I learned that from someone important.”
What are you talking about? From who? I don’t think you did, Kirito. Pretty sure you’ve been saying backwards nonsense like that since the first episode.
This was an odd ep, since it was especially interesting/exceptionally boring at the same time. The best stuff was during the fight when we get to see “Kirito: Master Strategist” at work.
Kirito: “A row of tower-shields?! I better attack head-on!”
*slam* *gets knocked on ass*
Kirito: “Oh, that didn’t work. Better attack head-on!”
*repeated failure*
Dumbass: “I better attack HEAD-ON, only now…I’ll GRAB THEIR SHIELD! YAH!”
My friend started laughing at how frustrated I was getting. It’s simple, basic shit! Stop being a chauvinist and use your teammate to attack the mages while you work to flank the three shield-bearers. Or, you know, have her SHIELD YOU FROM MAGIC!! I can’t beleive she had a spell like that and -never- thought to use it!
“No, I better not. After all, he wants me to just heal him, and if I did anything useful he might get angry at me for thinking for myself.”
I loved -LOVED- it when Loli-fairy tells Imouto-tits, “Use your remaining Mana to block the next magic attack!” And Tits’s response?
“…That won’t help.”
My palm shattered my forehead and pushed through the other side at that point. Fuck. Me.
I did? I remember writing…
• Kirito: “I learned that from someone important.” Yeah, maybe you should save that important someone before getting involved in an MMO war of no consequence.
The thing that’s really dumb about the fight is that Kirito is supposed to be this MMO expert. Hell, you don’t even need to be an MMO expert to realize that the tanks will be up front, and the damage dealers/healers will be in the back. And yet, Kirito doesn’t even think about attacking his enemies in any other way.
Oops, sorry, mate. I read your review, then watched the episode, and by the time I came back to leave a response I guess I’d forgotten about what you wrote. Good point, though. Haha~
Yeah, he’s got the intelligence of a pup. Hell, all the villain will have to do is use a laser pointer on him and have him chase it out a window.
-I’m certain you’ve figured this out already, but I genuinely think the author wants us to believe that Kirito’s big flaw is his lack of creativity. You remember what I posted a while back about how an overpowered protagonist must have a vital chink in their armor for there to be any tension in the narrative (though you likely already knew that since it’s basic stuff these Mary Sue writers routinely forget)? Well, maybe Kirito’s chink is his inability to want to explore combat to its fullest, instead using his high leveled power to just attack right in front of him like a small dog ramming its head into a glass wall when it sees a biscuit on the other side.
I know you could probably give this transformation scene as an example of him finally thinking differently, but not really. All he does is what he did before: charges ahead.
Thing is, this type of flaw is rarely used on a protagonist since it makes them seem less “real” and “human” and more “completely moronic”. Eventually, when used, the story should always force the protagonist to learn from their mistakes and grow up. However SAO routinely denies Kirito this very simple, basic arc and retards his chances at growth by handing him allies that help instead or he magics up some superpower that helps him do what he’s been doing, only this time it works.
With no room for growth, Kirito is still a child, and will forever be a retarded Gary Stu.
“Retarded” in both meanings of the term.
Then again, considering the plot and characters of this thing, it’s likely the author never intended Kirito to grow up. I mean, if he did, he’d realize just what a waste of time this nonsense was and how stupid everyone else around him is.
I’m pretty sure that the spell that Kirito used to turn into the 74th floor boss monster was not an illusion spell, but a transformation spell. Recall that Leafa told Kirito to learn a healing spell when he crashed into the tower, which implies that although Spriggans specialize in treasure hunting and illusion magic, they (and other races) can learn other spells that they do not specialize in. The reason for him being able to use this spell is because Yui knows every spell in the game, and she informed him of it, which Kirito noted at 13:43.
In no way am I suggesting that it is good writing to allow Kirito to use such a ridiculous spell, and you probably know just how poor my opinion of SAO is, considering how I pretty much placed episode 14 of SAO below virtually everything that aired during that week. I am just maintaining that what he used wasn’t an illusion spell.
If you’re right, that’s incredibly lame writing. May as well just have Kirito cast Meteor/Apocalypse/”superstrongspell” and wipe out anything in his path.
I’m glad you brought that up since I was a bit confused over that whole nonsense.
Wait, then if he can cheat like that why doesn’t he just save the girl, kill the bad guy, and be done with this thing in a single episode? Just transform into a dragon, fly up there, use some super spell from his Gameshark loli daughter, and fly away into the sunset?
…The hell is wrong with this writer making up things as they go along with nothing but a flimsy sheet of an explanation and NO reasoning behind why this doesn’t just end in the next episode??
“Aren’t there GMs to prevent PVP combatants from literally taking people’s avatars prisoners?”
Dunno about that, but there are GMs there who literally take people’s avatars prisoners.
So why are the inmates running the asylum?
I will be surprised if the entire concept of ALO Kirito didn’t come from Final Fatasy 7.
Also, as much as Lyfa was capable enough for the battle, she’s just following a SAO rule that she will survive if she chooses to be co-dependent over a man. I mean, Griselda was about to become strong and independent back in episode 6, but she ends up getting killed. There’s also a female character who is said to be stronger than Kirito and, if ever she WAS in SAO should would bestow the dual wields. Sadly, she has AIDS since birth and she eventually dies.
So much for grrl power.
It’s kinda sad when you trace Asuna’s development as a character. She starts off as a mysterious, lone adventurer much like Kirito in the second episode. After a while, they meet up again and we clearly see Asuna in some sort of leadership position. I think this would be around the start of the Griselda mini-arc? It’s at this point that she starts hanging out with Kirito more and more. Eventually, we meet her overprotective bodyguard. Y’know, she’s second-in-command and everything, but she still needs to be protected by men even in the middle of a safe zone like a town. Then, she marries Kirito and soon “dies.” Now, she’s literally stuck in a birdcage as a prize for two men to fight over. Yeeeeeeep.
Haha, skilled girl gamers literally have the AIDS.
It’s kinda sad when you trace Asuna’s development as a character. She starts off as a mysterious, lone adventurer much like Kirito in the second episode. After a while, they meet up again and we clearly see Asuna in some sort of leadership position. I think this would be around the start of the Griselda mini-arc? It’s at this point that she starts hanging out with Kirito more and more. Eventually, we meet her overprotective bodyguard. Y’know, she’s second-in-command and everything, but she still needs to be protected by men even in the middle of a safe zone like a town. Then, she marries Kirito and soon “dies.” Now, she’s literally stuck in a birdcage as a prize for two men to fight over. Yeeeeeeep.
I’m sad really that she devolved into this waifu character, since we are focused on on her love for Kirito and her leet cooking than her sword prowess and her powers as Vice-Commander. I think Asuna started off like a badass, mind you because they wanted her to BE Kirito’s perfect woman. I mean, a beautiful gamer chick with a high position in a guild, great sword skills and an expert cook as Kirito’s wife? She’s my perfect woman!
In fact, i think as much as he looks like loves Asuna, he’s not respectful in her decisions and not trustful in her abilities. And when she gets dramatic and all touching, he gives off an annoyed reaction. It’s just SAD that this is now the model perfect couple in anime standards.
Haha, skilled girl gamers literally have the AIDS.
Hey, Skilled Girl Gamer at least taught Asuna to fight fo her right as a waifu!~
What’s more, it’s her and only her who actually does anything to keep their relationship going. She refuses to transfer out from their special school, she is the one to adjust her future to his, she is the one to fight her parents for her right to live on her own. While all he does is taking her on dates occasionally.
Guuuuuuuuuuuys~, spoilers for upcoming SAO seasons!
Nah, I’m just kidding. I don’t care.
…Wow, that was actually very sad. And the worst part is that there’s no intense drawback on any of her actions and fans would think that Asuna made the BEST decision giving her own life up to be with Kirito.
A++++ post as usual.
(I’m not familiar with illusion magic myself, but the last time I checked, ‘illusion’ meant looking like something but actually not becoming it. Not, you know, transforming into a giant Satan Godzilla and eating people. But wait! This is Kirito. Why am I even talking.)
Yeah, it’s about as illusive as a fireball.
I think you’d need to think EVE Online for ALO, not WOW. That’s a better analogy, in my view of ALO. Of course, the problem is that the player base is unrealistically small. If there were several hundred thousand players instead, this section’s plausibility would probably be stronger.
It’s not the implausibility of intense Factional Politics in itself, but rather, ALO doesn’t seem to have near enough players for something like that to emerge.
Even if Alfheim Online is more like Eve Online than WoW, there are still fundamental problems with the narrative. For instance, Kirito putting his time-sensitive quest to save Asuna on hold in order to help Leafa. Whatever happens to Leafa and her race, it can obviously wait. It’s just a game, after all; no one’s life is at stake. Guess who’s life is at stake though!