This week’s topic of conversation is Kai’s ex Serina. Serina, Serina, Serina. We can’t seem to get enough of her, apparently. Seriously, there’s so much here that I don’t understand. The last time I talked about this anime, I mentioned how high school and everything about it is nothing more than a distant memory for me. But even when I dig deep down into my gray matter, I still can’t find anything that helps me relate to these kids. Like why do they fawn over people so much just for being attractive? Sure, there were popular kids back in my day. But it didn’t mean that the vast majority of the student body did nothing but talk about said popular kids. But all throughout this episode, it’s Kai this, Serina that, Kai used to date Serina, why did they break up, blah blah blah. Bro, who the fuck cares? Where are my nerds at, geeking out over whatever dweeb stuff we like to talk about? Where are the goth-equivalents at, always looking down on the “sheeple?” How about the jocks who can only talk about sports? Some anime — big emphasis on “some” — makes Japanese high schools seem so damn monotonous, and Honey Lemon Soda is one of them. NPC is the apt description for everyone not named Kai or Serina, because that’s what they are; they don’t seem to exist for any reason other than gabbing about the two hot, attractive people.

And what is wrong with Uka? Well, a lot, actually. That sounds mean if you take those words as a judgment of her character, but I’m simply trying to be descriptive. She’s a textbook overthinker and she also has cripplingly low self-esteem, a dangerous combination. She says something like, “Oh, the one who truly deserves to be with Kai is Serina. Why did he break up with someone so amazing?” And this is at the start of the episode before she even know anything about the other girl other than that 1) she’s pretty and 2) she used to date Kai. Seriously, that is so weird. Who does this? Serina could be a raging bitch for all we know. Or maybe Serina and Kai had a really toxic relationship. Or neither of those things are true, but it wouldn’t matter because people date who they date, people love who they love. This whole “She deserves to be with him” or use whatever gender you want is bizarre to me. Nobody deserves anybody. Being a good person doesn’t entitle you to date anyone. You are compatible with them or you ain’t. It didn’t work out between Kai and Serina. End of story. But Uka’s not alone. Even the NPCs can’t help but violate Serina’s privacy by snooping on her phone, discovering that the girl still has a pic of Kai from middle school, then proceeding to tell Kai that he should date her again. Not “I should date her!” No, even when they have a choice, they choose to lose to the hot guy. Seriously, why the hell do you all care so much? I don’t understand. I really don’t.

My inability to understand doesn’t stop there either. Why do people choose to hang out with the people that they do? Serina’s group of friends can turn nasty on a dime. When they see Kai and Uka at a diner together, they can’t help but walk up and bug the guy about — guess what? — Serina! OMG, what a fascinating topic! I can’t wait to discuss this again and again and again and again… When the gang learns that Uka has a very early curfew (5PM), they start bullying the poor girl. This time, it’s Serina who steps up to the plate and defends our heroine from the peanut gallery… by completely flipping out and splashing a drink on her friends. You could’ve just told them off, but let’s move on. So the mean girls turn on Serina the next day at school, prompting Uka to heroically jump in the way and take the slap. If you can move your body that fast, why not just… catch the arm? Still, looks like things are irreparable between Serina and her former group, right? Nope. They go right back to being friends afterwards even though Serina doesn’t even sound like she thinks very highly of the trio all that much. And it’s not her either. Kai has a group of annoying, nosy dudes who buzz around him, constantly pestering him with questions about Serina. He doesn’t even look the least bit happy either. But he’s still there. He still hangs with them. Sure, I get peer pressure and all that. Sometimes, kids fear being ostracized, so they cling to bad influences. But does that sound like Serina and Kai? They can pick and choose who they want to hang out with. So why do they hang out with the people that they do? There’s a saying that goes, “You are the company you keep.”

When I watch this show, I feel like an alien observing the human species in action from a distance. ‘Cause all of that stuff above? Completely bizarre to me. I hung out with people I liked. I had fun with people I liked. I never had to tell my friends off. I never had to stop them from bullying anyone. I never bugged my buddies about their love lives. Sure, we had arguments, but we never got physical. There are some things in this anime that I can relate to. I do get Uka’s self-deprecating, doomer attitude — so self-deprecating that it kills the conversation^*. I totally understand having a crush on someone, then deciding that you probably have no chance with them anyway. I never literally looked up the definition of “vibes,” but I get not understanding social dynamics. It’s one of those things that you just have to experience for yourself. I understand not knowing how to make small talk. So despite all of that, go Uka for stepping out of her comfort zone, signing up for the cultural festival, so on and so forth. I wouldn’t say she’s courageous, but she certainly has enough courage for now. Granted, Kai had to throw her a bone by showering the girl with a slew of compliments at just the right moment — just as our heroine was about to sink to the bottom of her self-despair (’cause Serina is so superior). But hey, we all need help. But everything else about this episode? So goddamn baffling to me.

^*Like when you make one of those “Ugh, I suck so much that I want to kill myself” joke (haha, yeah, joke) around the wrong group of acquaintances, so they just look at you like you’re a freak.