Ori thinks Tamon and Utage kissed on the beach that day, and he’s been obsessively replaying the scene over and over in his head. By the end of this week’s episode, he will admit to himself that he’s in love with Utage. But why? Literally why? What does he even know about her other than that she’s crazy about Tamon? Oh, she tells him to be his pure and sincere self? That’s enough to be in love with someone? C’mon, get out of here. I’m not convinced. I’m simply not. Ori was right the first time: “I thought I only wanted to get her to look my way because of my pride…” He has his own fans — a veritable sea of them — but he wants what he can’t have. He’s just another petulant child.
As usual, the plot is thin in this week’s episode. Thanks to the summer training camp, Utage hasn’t finished her summer homework. She’s not the best at math and science either. Tamon wants to support her, but he’s a numbskull as well. As a result, Ori sees an opening. He thinks he can win the girl over with his smarts. Yeah, sure, she’s only the biggest Tamon fan in the world. That means she totally cares about intelligence, right? Nevertheless, Ori pushes on with his ill-conceived plan. He flips a switch and acts nice for once, but doesn’t that just show how fake he is? How is this a winning strategy? Oh, you’ve been a total and complete dick to me for weeks and weeks on end, but now you’re nice. I’m sold!
Cue the sad backstory. Great, Ori’s parents are fucked up. What? Am I supposed to start nodding knowingly with pity now? Plenty of people have shitty parents. Guess what? They rise above their circumstances, and that’s why we respect them. Can Ori step out of the way now? Shoo, shoo, you’re preventing me from hating on the main couple. I don’t need cheap alternatives when I’ve got the main course right in front of me. Plus, all the pitiful backstory does is make Ori’s attempts to spy on Utage even more pathetic than before. If his goal is to surpass his parents, how is going after a groupmate’s fan going to accomplish that? This is a waste of time that does nothing but feed into the show’s tired ass reverse harem framework.
Predictably, Ori’s best moves do nothing for Utage. See? This is why he’ll always be second fiddle to his parents. He’s got nothing going for him. He’s too dumb to realize he’s wasting his time, he has a terrible personality, and he couldn’t even win the center role. He’s not even the best boy in the boy band, and he thinks he can become a superstar? Hey, nobody ever talks about Joey Fatone for a reason. Tamon’s going to go on his Timberlake arc. Meanwhile, Ori is fated to get fat and fade into obscurity. That’s just how it goes for mediocre people, buddy. Right before the episode ends, Ori is forced to watch as a Tamon superfan keep her eyes glued to (duh) Tamon. Get this loser off the stage. He’s lost the Utage sweepstakes. Hell, he was never in the running to begin with. How much more screentime does he need?
Stray thoughts & observations:
— Well, at least this series admits that idol groups can lean too far into queer-baiting.
— How do these characters keep bumping into each other like this? First, Ori encounters Utage, then Utage runs into Tamon. Then another familiar face shows up. What a small world.
— Once again, Keito pulls the hot and cold act. Mostly cold. Ice cold. I love how people will defend a guy who is mean 90% of the time, but that 10%, though! “He’s secretly a nice guy! You just have to get to know him.” They also say that about pitbulls seconds before they maul yet another toddler.
— Wait, Keito just handed Tamon a bottle of used coffee grounds because it’ll help with sleeplessness? Huh? I had to look this up. Apparently, it can help with those dark bags under your eyes when you don’t get enough sleep. Right.
— Turns out Tamon can’t even help her with her homework, because he’s as dumb as he is negative.
— Same schtick every episode. Gloomyhara bashes himself, then Utage “scolds” him by praising Hottiehara. But the reason why her praise never sticks is because they’re talking past each other. He’s insulting his actual self, she’s praising the fake persona he has created strictly for entertainment. We’re nine episodes in, and we’re still trapped in this conundrum. He actually has to spell it out to her that he wants Gloomyhara to be important to her as well.
— Look, I didn’t start out wanting to hate this show. I just got there naturally after two whole months of red flags and a stark lack of romance. I simply do not believe they can turn this around in the final few weeks of the winter season.
