Feeling a bit down lately due to… well, everything going on in the world right now, but the (anime) show(s) must go on.
Wash It All Away Ep. 11
In the first half of the episode, Kyusho tries to go about his daily life, but he can’t help but constantly think about Wakana. When he bumps into her later, the wind somehow manages to flip her skirt up. What an amazing plot. Nearly 11 minutes about nothing but a panty flash.
In the second half of the episode, Nairo spots a hatch on the floor. She’s dreaming of grand, epic adventures behind said hatch, but unsurprisingly, it opens up to nothing more than a tiny storage space. In it, Wakana finds a bunch of old cleaning supplies and a moldy stuffed stuffed animal. Even though it’s the busy season of the year, Wakana is hellbent on cleaning the long forgotten toy right here and right now. Why? ‘Cause it should’ve been returned to the customer! She can’t stand that it wasn’t! Arrrrgh!!!! Christ, it’s a fucking stuffed animal. Chill out.
Is next week’s episode the final episode? Is this how we’re going to wrap up the season? By trying to return a toy? Pfft. You know what? It should become a tsukumogami and haunt Wakana. I doubt the stuffed animal is over 100 years old, but that would be one helluva curveball.
There was a Cute Girl in the Hero’s Party, so I Tried Confessing to Her Ep. 11
Man, this show is ugly. You can forgive bad animation, but even when the characters are standing completely still, this show just looks amateurish. In fact, that’s an insult to amateurs. I’ve seen fans put out better animation than this. Anyway, Raven is still insecure about his voice. I thought we had already settled this, but I guess not. Since this episode is all about overcoming insecurities, Happiness finally decides to reveal the truth to Raven about her nature — that she is, y’know, a harpy. Predictably, he doesn’t stop loving her, so all’s well that ends well. Except for, y’know, Cecilia potentially being married off to some random guy whom we’ve yet to meet. Next week’s episode should be the concluding one, right? We’re not going to go 13 episodes for this nonsense, are we? It’s kinda annoying that Cecilia still can’t admit she feels anything for Yoki.
Tune In to the Midnight Heart Ep. 11
We get an Inohana-focused episode. One day, while on an excursion for potted plants with her club, the girl comes across her former friend Aiko doing a street performance all by her lonesome. Why does the guy in the screenshot above look so different from everyone else? But this is neither here nor there, so let’s get to the crux of the matter. The big sad backstory is that Inohana and Aiko both wrote a song together, but a record label only wanted Inohana. Supposedly, her friend isn’t a good enough singer. I do not have a discerning ear for this sort of thing. Personally, their singing abilities both sound about the same to me. Nevertheless, Aiko decided to pin her hopes and dreams on Inohana, which is why she’s still mad to this day that the latter gave up on singing original songs after a few setbacks. But can’t you say the same about her? Didn’t Aiko give up on them singing together just because one record label slagged her voice? I simply can’t imagine dropping a friend over something like this. And let’s be honest: the chances of two random middle schoolers making it big as music artists are incredibly low. You might as well enjoy doing it now as friends. It’s like never playing a pickup basketball game with your friend again, because an NBA scout doesn’t think you’re good enough to go pro. Like seriously?
Nevertheless, hearing Aiko’s candid feelings spurs Inohana to finally stop singing all those popular cover songs. She starts belting her own original stuff instead. Many of her fans are disappointed initially, but some of them think Inohana’s own songs are better anyway. Again, I don’t have a discerning ear for this sort of thing. It all sounds the same to me anyway. Plus, this whole distinction between popular cover songs and putting out your own original work feels like a false dichotomy. I’ve seen so many amateur singers put out popular covers on, say, Youtube, blow up in popularity, then start putting out their own work. It doesn’t have to be one or the other. You can use popular existing songs to build a fanbase, then start sneaking in your original songs into your performances. Y’know, to ease them in. Yeah, artists want to draw their own shit, but they also take commissions because that’s where the money is. There’s no shame in that. Even when you go to a concert, sure, people are there to hear their favorite bands sing new songs, but the encore is usually some age-old favorite from albums ago. I don’t care how many years it’s been, but could you imagine a concert from The Killers without them performing “Mr. Brightside” at some point in the setlist? You’d be disappointed! To put it bluntly, all this talk about putting out only your original work feels like classic early 2000s or 2010s hipster bullshit. “Um, you probably haven’t even heard of this song… ’cause, like, I just wrote it…”
The best part is when Inohaha finally decides that she wants to express how she truly feels to her special friend, but she feels like it’s wrong to do so through music. Say that to all the fucking love songs out there. Inohana then compromises by saying that she’ll finally sing to the person dear to her if she can at least sell 50 CDs. Girl, you are exhausting.
The Case Book of Arne Ep. 11
Arne realizes that there’s one commonality tying all of the cases together: paintings. Mysteries tend to do this a lot, huh? I’m currently reading a book right now about a guy collecting stories about strange buildings. At first, the testimonies he gets from complete strangers seem unrelated, but when he and his architect friend step back and look at them side by side, they start to realize that it’s all connected. Oooooh~ well, it’s not exactly literary genius, but it’s a fun read right before I fall asleep in bed.
Anyways, when our heroes go to investigate, they are met at the door by Louis himself! It can’t be. That little twerp died right from the get-go. Nevertheless, the-being-known-as-Louis reveals that he’s the one behind all of the creepy paintings. Lynn even recognizes one of them; her father had one of these paintings, and it was the reason why he went insane. The evil mastermind has been sowing discord across the land all along!
Honestly, I hate this revelation. I hate, hate, hate this trope with a passion. Y’see, kids, the only reason why people suck is because there’s some magical force making them suck. No, screw that. Look, people sometimes just suck! That’s a plain, simple fact about humanity. We literally just uncovered a conspiracy involving billionaires participating in a shadowy pedophile ring to traffick and pray on young girls. We don’t need a special reason for people to suck. They just do! It’s much more interesting that Lynn’s father was a complicated man. The fact that some generic edgy painting made him evil robs him of his agency.
Fake Louis reveals that he’s actually Vlad, i.e. the OG himself. And the crowd goes mild! I know, I know, the crowd is just me. Still, what am I supposed to get excited for? Arne and Dracula, two vampire kings, dueling like Goku vs Frieza? Who the hell cares? I’m here for the mystery. Unfortunately, there is no mystery, because Dracula proceeds to imprison Arne in a coffin. Oh, we’ll still get that duel, but it’s not the last episode yet. So for now, sit tight as Lynn and company march on Dracula’s castle in an attempt to save Arne. Great, we’ve become an action anime to cap off the season.
As an aside, that zombie army must be rank. Yeah, the girls need help wherever they can get it, but those zombies are still decomposing corpses at the end of the day.
Jack-of-All-Trades, Party of None Ep. 11
Finally, we get some plot. Two things are happening simultaneously: Orhun’s new party are trying to defeat the black dragon while the kiddos are doing a field exam where they need to reach floor 30 on their own. Unfortunately, one of Orhun’s childhood friend — the one that thinks he’s dead — has finally arrived. Her party intends to lure the Dragonslayer out by attacking the kiddos. For some reason, her organization wants to prevent adventurers from ever clearing a dungeon. For good reasons or evil reasons? I can’t tell at the moment. Again, childhood friend doesn’t know she’s actually going after Orhun. Hoo boy, she’s gonna be so embarrassed when she finds out! Meanwhile, Orhun, Selma and the rest of the party are still in the middle of battling the black dragon when he finds out that the kiddos need help. What will he do?! WHAT WILL HE DO?!
I mean, c’mon, what kinda protagonist would Orhun be if he just ignores his students’ plight, especially when one of them is a love interest. I predict the kids to try and put up a fight, but still get demolished pretty easily. After all, Caroline is already doing her best Yamcha impression. And just when Sophia is about to die — it has to be her because she’s special — Orhun will arrive in just the nick of time to save her. It’ll be like when Krillin and Gohan had to hold out against the Ginyu Force until Goku could arrive! Whether or not Orhun can defeat the “Ginyu Force” is another matter, but he’ll definitely take down the oaf. He’s basically the Recoome of the group. He’s just there to be a jobber. His size makes him look intimidating, but he’ll fold instantly against Orhun. On the other hand, if the leader had been anyone else, then I’d say she loses easily too. But since she’s a childhood friend, shrug. They obviously won’t fight to the death. You can’t kill your waifu.
Easygoing Territory Defense by the Optimistic Lord Ep. 10
Another kingdom invades Scuderia, so Van is pressured into lending a hand. Really? Can’t he just make some shit up like how he has bone spurs? Ah well, it’s not like Van’s going to lose. For instance, the enemy takes a fortress city by employing a fleet of wyverns. Those same wyverns, however, are then cut down singlehandedly by Arte’s marionette. Yup, somehow a child who had had a complex about her talent up until last week’s episode can take on another kingdom’s air force on her own. The remaining enemy soldiers try to charge her position, but the adventurers in Van’s employ have no problems dispatching them. Van then plans to retake the fortress city by creating a bunch of catapults. Pfft, if he really knew what he was talking about, he’d be making trebuchets instead.
But in all seriousness, no casualties means no drama. Is it bad that Van wants everyone to survive? Of course not. As a leader of men (and women), he should want every single one of them to make it back home safe and sound. But at the same time, this doesn’t make for a very compelling story. We’re just watching a kid press the “I win” button over and over.
Anyway, the cat’s finally out of the bag, because his family now knows that Van is the bee’s knees. Of course, his father tries to remain incredulous despite hearing about Van’s exploits from the king himself, but at least the older brother — the one that argued in favor of sparing Van — is happy and proud. The bloodline isn’t completely tainted.
The Invisible Man and His Soon-to-Be Wife Ep. 10
These two are kinda prudish.
Jarashi is astonished that Yako and Tonome have yet to get into a full blown argument. I don’t think that’s odd at all. Their relationship is relatively new. Hell, they haven’t even started living together. That’s when you really gotta compromise as a couple. Nevertheless, let’s get something straight. I think of fights like illnesses but for relationships. Do we sometimes get a cold? Of course. It’s called the common cold for a reason. Similarly, do couples sometimes bicker? Of course. When two people try to cohabitate, you’re bound to get a disagreement or two. The issue at hand is the frequency. If you were constantly getting sick, you would be concerned, no? I view arguments in a relationship much the same way. When people say, “Oh, it’s normal for couples to fight,” I never know what they truly mean, because we haven’t specified the frequency. Similarly, if a couple never fights, is that really so odd? Again, going with the cold analogy, would you really think it’s weird if someone told you they haven’t gotten a cold in over a year? I mean, I literally haven’t been sick for a while now (knock on wood). So likewise, it’s weird to me to ask a couple why they don’t fight. It’s like asking them, “Yo, why are you guys so healthy? Why isn’t there more friction in your relationship?” And when you do this, you allow doubt to foment in people who are inexperienced with dating like Yako. She’s just trying to live her best life, but now she has to wonder if she and Tonome are a “normal” couple.
In the second half of the episode, Tonome pays a visit to Yako’s family, because he figures he should at least meet them before he and his girlfriend move in together. Sure, I guess. Well, the little brother is very protective of his big sister. It’s not exaggerated like, say, Yuri from Spy x Family, but his stroppy attitude is still a bit silly. Both the mom and dad are fine with their adult daughter shacking up with her boyfriend, but her little brother is somehow offended that he wasn’t informed ahead of time. Bro, c’mon. It’s your sister’s love life. It’s none of your business.
The kid does raise a good point, though: Tonome being invisible means he doesn’t know where to look when talking to the man. So much of communication is conveyed through facial expressions and body language. As a result, there’s always going to be a huge gap in understanding when you try to interact with someone who is literally invisible like Tonome. You can even say that they have an advantage over you, because they can read you better than you can read them. But hey, it’s his sister’s boyfriend, and his sister is happy. So whatever, just get over it.
Anyway, next week, it’ll be Yako’s turn to meet the future in-laws.
The Holy Grail of Eris Ep. 10
Another huge mess of an episode. I had to laugh when Deborah managed to kidnap Lucia. Basically, she had to have known the exact street that Lucia and her servant would walk down. She then sent a black cat to swipe a pastry from Lucia’s hands. She also had to guess that Lucia’s servant would be dumb enough to try and chase after the cat to get said pastry back. As a former pet owner, believe me, you do not want any food item that has been in a cat’s mouth. Anyway, this leads the servant down a dark alleyway where Deborah could then hold her hostage. But it’s all for naught, because Salvador apparently abhors targeting children. As a result, he has his men drag Deborah off for… well, nothing good, I can imagine. Ridiculous.
Meanwhile, Constance and Randolph are racing against the clock to find the missing Farisian prince. After all, failure means war. When the cult attacks them, Randolph suddenly realizes that he’s fallen for Constance. I don’t hate this coupling necessarily. It’s just that we’ve only ever seen them together when it’s all business. We’ve never seen them spend leisure time together, so it’s hard to say if they have any chemistry beyond being able to solve a mystery. Shoehorning a romance into a larger story rarely ever works out, because there’s usually no time to organically develop the relationship. Hell, they can’t even get the mystery part down, so what chance have they got with the romance? We also know relatively little about the guy. Randolph’s all, “I can never make a woman happy.” Yes, yes, how very dark and brooding of him. But what shows us this? What shows us the depths of his feelings of inadequacy? All we’re told is that he had a marriage of convenience with Lily, that he’s lost people he cared about. Beyond that, nothing. There’s no weight behind his woe, because it’s all exposition.
Daeg Gallus has finally decided to play their trump card, which is to repeat history. As such, they’re going to frame Constance of all people with kidnapping the Farisian prince. Yes, Constance. With what evidence, you ask? Pamela’s eyewitness testimony. Ah yes, the woman who was publicly humiliated by Constance can surely be trusted with the objective truth. Let’s not even get started on how eyewitness testimonies are unreliable to begin with. Nevertheless, her word alone might be enough to get our heroine executed, because the kingdom is ruled by weak, ineffectual men. Isn’t this poetic? Scarlett was sacrificed by her weak father in an attempt to save the kingdom, and now Constance faces the same fate. Except, of course, Constance has lots of people who care for her. Meanwhile, Scarlett only had her shitbag of a dad, the equally useless Enrique, and Lily, the true heroine of the story. Point is, Randolph and company will stop at nothing to save Constance and the country, so I’m not really feeling the suspense. I’m pretty confident Constance will survive.
Honestly, I have no emotional investment in the outcome. Our heroes are going to all this effort to save Adelbide from falling to Daeg Gallus’s machinations, but this country blows. Everyone here blows. The royalty sucks, and the nobles suck. People turn a blind eye to human trafficking and rampant corruption. Even the military has been infiltrated by the cult. Constance is pretty much being tried by a kangaroo court. I don’t want her to die, but as far as the country is concerned, it can all burn.
Roll Over and Die Ep. 10
What a Silent Hill ass episode. Y’see, a strange fog has descended on the city, and people like Sara and Ottilie have gone inexplicably missing. Despite this, Flum keeps seeing visions of them in the fog. The Church or whoever is covering things up, because they claim both Ed and Jonny have transferred elsewhere. Sure. But it’s even worse for Sara. For some reason, the kid has been excommunicated from the Church. Obviously, it’s because she knows too much. So of course, Flum starts doubting and blaming herself for her friends’ disappearances. She thinks none of them would’ve looked into the Church if she hadn’t shown up. When Milkit cheers her up, however, the fog lifts. Then when Milkit goes missing near the end of the episode — Dein suddenly confronts her and Eterna — the fog predictably returns. It’s clearly linked to Flum’s mental state. So like I said, it’s a Silent Hill ass episode.
Anyway, we peel back the curtains a bit on Ink. Despite her reluctance to say anything about her past, she eventually opens up a bit about her “Mother,” “Father,” and the other “siblings.” When Flum finds Ink near the end of the episode, the little girl has that freaky spiral on her face. Not only that, eyeballs keep falling out of it. So is she the source of the eyeballs after all? Does she have control over them? Is this scene even real and not some fog-induced hallucination? Shrug. I’m curious to see how this all plays out, but if I had to put my money on it, I bet none of the girls die. After all, I still think Sara is fine. Probably just chillin’ somewhere.
I have no clue what they’re doing with the hero’s party, though. That subplot feels oddly disconnected from everything else that’s been happening in the story. We’ve got freaky ass eyeballs mutating people into flesh blobs, so who gives a shit that the hero is bummed out? What does she have to do with anything?
Dark Moon: The Blood Altar Ep. 10
Wow, a third female character.
And then a fourth! Unfortunately, they’re both evil, so they die by the end of the episode. Welp, we’re back to just two women in the entire universe!
Plotwise, the vampy boys retrieve the magical MacGuffin that is absolutely required in order to slay the big, bad boss. Pretty boring. Meanwhile, the puppies find their friends, but might have stumbled into a trap when Dardan confronts them. Doubly boring.
HELL MODE: The Hardcore Gamer Dominates in Another World with Garbage Balancing Ep. 10
Two major developments in this week’s episode. First, the cat’s out of the bag on Allen’s talent. In fact, it’s been out of the bag. It was silly of Allen to think he could genocide all of the monsters in the area without anyone taking notice. Second, Mihai, the eldest Granville sibling, returns home for one whole day before he is sent off again. This time, however, he would never come back. He dies offscreen at the ripe old age of 15 for the sake of something called the Noble’s Duty. This is why the upper classes don’t want their kids to have talents. I mean, that just about settles it, right? This world is corrupt. We need to overthrow the ones in power!
But first things first, Cecil have decided to run away… because… because… um, because what exactly? What does she even hope to achieve by doing this? It’s not going to bring her dead brother back. Well, Allen has go to find her. I guess we’re going to end the season on him and Cecil finally forming an actual friendship rather than this master-servant dynamic they’ve got going on.
Also, toxic gamer alert.
Reincarnated as a Dragon Hatchling Ep. 10
Our new human friend realizes that he’s going to die anyway, so he tells the MC to eat him. Apparently, this is how the dragon protagonist can evolve. Unfortunately, the villagers don’t understand this, so they think he just straight up murdered the guy. Basically, we’re back to square one on the whole befriend and coexist with humans thing. Myria still has faith in him, but she literally cannot be near his new form or else she’ll die. I would feel bad for the dragon protagonist, but… it still feels like the anime wants to pull some weird romance shit between him and the human girl. Well, I’m not interested in scalies and their love lives.
Ah well, he and the black lizard are equally toxic now, so at least he still has that going for him? On the other hand, will the black lizard even recognize him in his new form?
Scum of the Brave Ep. 10
Yashiro gets all pissy with Jougamine when she refuses to draw blood against her opponents. I mean, he knew this going in. She’s a classic do-gooder. He’s not going to change her, and he shouldn’t have agreed to mentor her in the first place. Also, these four are still in the middle of hostile territory, so it’s doubly stupid to have this argument.
The Coffin Count of Storms eventually shows up. This is the lady who has constantly tried to recruit Yashiro. He wants information about Half Dragon’s whereabouts from her, but she won’t give them to him unless he and his three mentees agree to fight the most elite of her men. All of a sudden, Yashiro is reluctant to put the girls in danger. Then why did you bring them here?!
But we don’t gotta worry about that for long, because weirdo freak monsters suddenly crash the party and start killing people left and right. Indo loses control, because she wants revenge on the monsters. As a result, Yashiro gets heavily injured protecting her. Couldn’t have happened to a nicer guy.
In the Clear Moonlit Dusk Ep. 10
Ichimura isn’t beating around the bush anymore. He drops by the curry shop just to see Takiguchi, but she’s still as painfully dense as ever. So he goes ahead and spells it out explicitly. He even invites her over to his place. Unfortunately, our heroine hems and haws. “Um, gosh, if I’m free~…” Which, of course, opens the door for the other guy to swoop in and occupy her time. Sigh, are we really doing this? I guess we’re doing this.
Remember how Ouji wanted Takiguchi to help him pick out a present for his sister? Yup, nothing shady about that. Unfortunately, Takiguchi is, again, painfully dense, so she opts to hang out with the wannabe homewrecker instead of her actual boyfriend. ‘Cause, y’know, loose plans you made over a week ago are ironclad. You can’t just text him gift ideas over the phone or whatever. Nope, you have to directly go to brick and mortar shop like a boomer.
Look, guys and girls can be just friends. We all know that. But that’s reality, and this ain’t that. This is fantasy, where we gotta play up the drama. As a result, Ouji confesses to a girl who is already seeing someone. Instead of rejecting him because she already has a boyfriend, Takiguchi just stands there completely shocked like an idiot. C’mon, she’s not a little kid. Teens her age knows what’s appropriate and what isn’t. We can’t keep pretending that Takiguchi is dumb as fuck. Ouji then leaves her there. We’re even treated to some of his backstory, but I don’t care. He’s a slimy bastard, so I tuned it out. Where’s the NTR Slayer when you need them?
Right before the credits roll, Takiguchi takes off running. I guess this is a cliffhanger of sorts. We’re left wondering if she’s running after Ouji or if she’s in a hurry to get to Ichimura because she feels guilty. But if it’s the latter, why wouldn’t she just call him on her phone? It’s for the drama, man, the drama!
Kunon the Sorcerer Can See Ep. 12
Again, the factions fight over Kunon. The kid, however, entertains the thought of joining all of them. Why? Because they all have cute girls. He’s only 12, but he’s already acting like a fuckboy.
The only part of the episode that is semi-interesting is when Kunon’s magical eye spies a menacing spirit clinging to some guy. Remember how his magical eye would see weird shit like a giant crab in his room? Or how his fiancee had a quill on her head? Well, the story kinda just dropped that subplot until now. Maybe now that we’re near the end of the season, it’ll finally go somewhere. But other than that, the story is as aimless as always. It doesn’t seem to be building up to anything at all.
Hana-Kimi Ep. 12
Apparently, this is the season finale. So how does it all end? Well, the miscreants from the rival dorm don’t break Mizuki’s leg. They just opt to kidnap her instead. Oh, much better. Phew, I’m glad no actual crime was commi-… Naturally, the boys spring into action and save Mizuki. In fact, this incident might have helped Sano finally realize that he cares for Mizuki on a deeper level. I guess that’s our climax. I love how these characters are touch-starved, but they can’t just hug the people they care about. They have to instead contort themselves into all sorts of weird positions in order to initiate contact. Don’t mistake this for progress, though. Nuh-uh, we can’t have that. Not even for the final episode. So for now, mum’s the word on Sano’s feelings.
What happened to the boys who kidnaped Mizuki? Well, she just forgives them, because… um, they apologized. Big sowwy. We didn’t know we couldn’t do that! But I mean, when you’re a girl sneaking in a boys’ only school in order to stalk your crush, you can’t exactly go around judging others. What Mizuki can do, however, is help her team win the relay. Yay, the good guys win ag–… well, somebody won.
I’ve dislike Mizuki from the start, and I have hardly been subtle about it. If a guy tried to pull the same stunt, he would be labeled a major creep. So I can only judge Mizuki the same way. She sucks.
Kaya-chan Isn’t Scary Ep. 10
Kaya lost her confidence, because she thought she couldn’t defeat a specter. I think that was just a human creep trying to kidnap her. But thankfully, with a little help from her aunt — and a desire to protect her friends from yet another nasty spirit haunting her preschool — Kaya is back to ghost-bustin’. She even saves Namu at one point with nothing more than a hula hoop. And boy, is she going to need those powers, because we’re finally ramping up to the final showdown.
Chie finally opens up to Nana, so the older Ebisumori sister clears a few things up. Blah blah blah, divine lineage, blah blah blah, power-hungry family conducting weird-ass rituals. Basically, these special ghost-bustin’ abilities would normally be reserved for the eldest daughter in each generation, but Kaya’s mom stole… something? They were vague about that. What Nana never realized, however, was that her little sister is currently pregnant, so the woman has preformed the dark ritual twice. But why? Is it because Kaya isn’t evil? Basically, the first attempt didn’t work out. She created a sweet child instead, so she was like, “Naw, gotta get pregnant with a real evil bastard this time.” And this whole time, her husband is still clueless.
Well, Nana tries to confront the demon spawn, but nearly dies from the encounter. It turns out her mother, i.e. Kaya’s grandma, predicted that this might happen, so the old woman essentially sacrificed herself for her daughter. It sounds like the Ebisumori family are guilty of a lot of horrible acts, so this is probably just karma finally biting mawmaw in the ass. But hey, at least she performed one last good deed before leaving this mortal plane. But now what? At this point, Kaya’s the only one who can stop the malevolent specter, right?
This show’s pacing isn’t the best, but I’m sorta looking forward to how this all plays out. That’s more than I can say for a lot of shows this season.
Noble Reincarnation: Born Blessed, So I’ll Obtain Ultimate Power Ep. 12
The emperor must have said something to the effect of “See, isn’t Noah perfect for your granddaughter” maybe three or four times throughout the episode. Relax, bro. You don’t need to play a used car salesman, because no woman can possibly resist your mega awesome shota prince.
In other news, the emperor intends to disinherit the crown prince. Ho hum. There is no depth to any of these characters, so all this political maneuvering is for naught. Noah’s personality boils down to “I’m awesome.” The emperor’s personality boils down to “I’m awesome but old.” If a character is allied to Noah, then their personality boils down to “I worship the ground that Noah walks on.” The bad princes’ personalities boil down to “I want power.” And that’s it. After eleven episodes, there’s literally nothing here to chew on.
What really sends me is how they don’t even throw us a bone like “Oh, Albert’s mother was once abjectly humiliated in front of all the aristocrats, so he’s been planning his revenge all this time.” Obviously, that isn’t a brilliant backstory; I literally just came up with it off the top of my head. But that’s my point: forget a compelling motivation for the antagonist, because there isn’t even a motivation beyond “I want power.” Dude, I bet you a five year old rambling while playing with toys could come up with a better story than this. And somehow, this shit is based on eleven light novels and counting. “Newer generations need to read more.” The monkey’s paw fucking curls.
The Villainess Is Adored by the Prince of the Neighbor(ing) Kingdom Ep. 10
I thought maybe the Sea King hated Tiararose because she felt bad for Icilla. But no, she’s just jealous of the Sky King doting on Tiararose. Of course. For fictional female characters, it’s always petty jealousy over men. As a result, Icilla is convinced by the Sea King to roofie Aquasteed’s tea with a love potion. For now, the 14-year-old girl has managed to steal him away from our heroine. This might be heart-breaking if Tiararose was likable, but… well, here we are.
I kinda enjoy villainess shows where the heroine does great deeds, and the guy has to prove that he deserves to stand beside her. She always chooses him in the end, but even if she didn’t, she’d still survive. She’d still live a fruitful life with a successful career and a list of accomplishments. On the other hand, what would Tiararose do without Aquasteed? I feel like she would just waste away and die. She has nothing going for her except her relationship to him. She has no dreams or aspirations beyond simply being his wife. I can’t even call her two-dimensional, ’cause that would be an insult to shapes.
Everything else about everything else:
Since I had time to kill before Monster Hunter Stories 3, I decided to revisit Atelier Resleriana. I kinda dropped the game last fall, because the story was frankly not doing it for me. My hunch ultimately proved to be correct. You have Rias and Slade, the two main characters. The rest of the party, however, consists of characters from previous Atelier titles. Unfortunately, I think the ensemble nature of the cast works against the game. Sure, it’s neat to see familiar faces again. Who doesn’t love Sophie? But she doesn’t have a story in this game beyond a certain someone asking her to mentor Rias. And like her, none of the other cast members have character arcs either. Wilbell is there for what? To find a rare ingredient? Which she randomly stumbles into at the end of a dungeon (technically a dimensional path), and that’s it. There’s absolutely no payoff whatsoever. The trophy you get for chatting her up is when she helps Rias find her missing wallet. That’s it. Similarly, Totori is just here to expand her market, so she decides to lend a hand in Rias and Slade’s investigation. And again, the resolution to her story is weak. In general, the Atelier series doesn’t exactly feature strong, compelling plots. What the games usually do instead, however, is lean on the relationship between the characters. Unfortunately, Rias and Slade have nothing to work with, because the cast is full of heroes and heroines who have their lives already figured out. There’s nothing like Plachta trying to regain her lost memories, or Lent dealing with his abusive father by trying to prove his worth as a warrior. You just have nostalgia bait with no real meaning behind any of it.
On a somewhat related note, the game tries to push the idea that there are two protagonists, but it doesn’t really work. Most of the alchemists that show up (all girls except for Logy) have little to no meaningful interaction with Slade. As a result, Rias still feels way more important than her partner.
There’s some romance between Rias and Slade, but it’s executed in that annoyingly coy fashion typical of anime, i.e. lots of “I want to protect you,” “I want to be with you,” etc. But no official declaration of love or anything like that. Like most of the game, it’s kinda sweet but ultimately not all that satisfying.
The resolution to the main plot is also littered with loose ends. You don’t end up saving the people who disappeared from the Red Mist, which really bugs me. All we get is a promise to save them in the near future, but what’s the point of sequel-baiting a game like this? If Gust is going to work on any sequel, I’d rather get a Yumia 2 than a Resleriana 2 for the reasons I outlined above. Hell, I’d rather see Ryza 4 than another Resleriana game. I also hated how the Polar Night Alchemists showed up for essentially a chapter (basically a cameo), then fucked off never to be seen again. Their story is probably continued in the gacha, huh? Well, I can’t exactly play it anymore, now can I? All I know is that the worldwide version shut down a while ago. Is the Japanese version of the gacha still chugging along?
Gameplay-wise, Resleriana has the same pros and cons as recent Atelier games. The gameplay loop is addictive as always, because the foundational elements are still strong. But because Gust doesn’t want to scare newcomers off, the game is once again way too easy. Yeah, you still need to craft stuff to advance the story, but you never have to worry about traits, item quality, or any other requirement that you might have found in the older games. I understand removing the time limit, because lots of people get anxious when you give them deadlines. But unless you play the game on the hardest difficulty, you never really need to learn the ins and outs of the crafting system. And even on “Very Hard,” which is the hardest difficulty available to you on a fresh playthrough, I was armed to the teeth by the midway point of the story. Sure, the combat is harder than Yumia, but that’s a dreadfully low bar. I never wiped once. There’s a trophy for doing at least 99999 damage. I slapped some basic gear together on Wilbell and did over 200k with her Supernova. I didn’t even try to make perfect gear. Someone had the bright idea that buffs and debuffs should stack non-stop. Basically, the game is a cakewalk.
Some fans will say that Resleriana is the best Atelier game in years, but I feel like that’s just contrarianism at work. Sure, Ryza and Yumia can be considered disappointing for the trends they’ve started, but what does Resleriana actually do that’s all that different? The crafting system is still brain dead, and so is the combat. The character writing is weaker than ever, and don’t even get me started on the dull as hell procedurally generated dungeons. The open world in previous games might be empty, but I’d take that over RNG bullshit any day of the week. Ryza and Yumia as characters have too much sex appeal? So does Rias with her nonstop boob physics. The only thing going for Resleriana is the return to a turn-based combat system for the first time since Sophie 2, but this is completely wasted due to the piss easy difficulty. Even on “Very Hard,” here are two fights at best that might trip you up. Two fights in a 40-hour JRPG. That’s disgraceful.
Currently, I’m about six or seven hours into Monster Hunter Stories 3. It’s… alright. The gameplay is fine, and it’s a pretty game. The story and its characters, however, feel a bit flat. I shouldn’t be surprised, though. I can’t remember the last time Capcom put out a story that moved me. Maybe it’ll get better after I sink in even more hours, but I’m currently having more fun looking at all the DLSS 5.0 memes.
Back to anime, so many people think the last episode of Frieren was the best of the entire series. Yeah, the animation was dope, but the best? Over all of the other episodes that nearly brought them to tears because the storytelling was so heartfelt and evocative? C’mon, man… are we just adrenaline junkies or what? Are we just meatheads thirsting for violence? ‘Cause it feels like that sometimes.
