Sacred Seven Ep. 10: I’m coming out!

And I want the world to know! Gonna let it show!

Alma stares dumbly at the camera for a good five seconds.

Welcome to Sacred Seven‘s flashback episode, but before we get to that, let’s retrace our steps — how did we get here? Last week, The Stone That Moved was inspired by his nakama to chase down a Darkstone missile. Sparks went flying and everything! Through dumb luck, one of the sparks inadvertently landed on Ruri’s sister, Aoi. Nothing happened initially though. Nope, no sir. Not till a week has past and Ruri gets a chance to run into her sister’s bedroom. After all, Ruri needs to be able to see the crystal dissipate! …well, not that this makes much of a difference. Unlike The Stone That Moved, Aoi is still a rock — rock loli!

Aoi didn’t listen when Grandma told her it would get stuck like so: ( ´Д`)

Ruri can’t believe her eyes. Will her dear sister be saved after all?! Better go tell Alma quick! …by literally going all the way to school and back. No one’s got cellphones in the world of Sacred Seven, I guess. For some reason, Ruri thinks his Holy Denseness would actually be able to tell her whether or not Aoi’s okay. No, of course he can’t. What he will do, however, is ask Ruri all about what happened five years ago. Ah, those were the good ol’ days — when Darkstones would pass through kidneys quietly in the night — when lolis were even richer and happier than they were before– holy crap, look at the pedostash on proto-Kagami:

Cheesy melodrama
Everything in this show makes me groan. The latest perpetrator? Ruri and Aoi had a falling out over a silly wreath. Y’know, it’s Christmas season, and everyone seems happy — except for young Kagami, of course — but when the slightest tug somehow managed to destroy the wreath and clay angel the sisters had painstakingly made with their own hands, Ruri goes all soap opera on us: “I hate you, Aoi!” Sheesh. All this and for what? Just so we can have the age-old “Uguu, the last thing I said to her was mean” trope.

Guys, this is the definition of contrived storytelling. This is when writers don’t allow their characters to evolve organically. Instead, we have a checklist of how a story must unfold, and goddamn, we’ll force a square peg into a round hole if we have to. Ruri can’t just be sad that her parents are gone and her sister’s trapped in a crystal. Ruri has to forever rue the day she uttered those bitter words to her sister! Anyway, someone thought it would actually be a good idea to have a young Ruri cry as she tries to mold yet another clay angel. I mean, did the writers honestly think this scene wouldn’t have been funny-looking?

Karate Butler
Okay, if this flashback is from Ruri’s perspective, how on earth did she know anything about pedo-butler’s karate fight with the Darkstone? Not only that, her flashback also features pedo-butler flipping thirty feet into the air after kicking the Darkstone in the torso. Ruri also imagines the Darkstone crashing into the kitchen and roasting every damn maid in the room with some sort of flame breath. Finally, Ruri regales Alma with the gruesome details of her parents’ death, which includes her father’s arm being burned to a crisp. Either she’s got one hell of a forensics report, or Ruri has quite the imagination.

Then even though he practically blew himself up, Kagami’s dad sticks around long enough to have a tearful heart-to-heart with his son. Awww. No worse for wear either! No sir, even in death, my hair will be perfectly parted!

The mystery of Aoi
Even though Ruri seems to know exactly how everything unfolded at her parents’ vacation home, she nevertheless knows nothing about her sister’s condition. I dunno, I just think this is kind of funny. This is just how stories lazily employ the flashback as a narrative device. So many writers seem to think that flashbacks are carte blanche to employ whatever POV’s available to them. Ruri’s story would’ve honestly been more believable coming from a Oujia board.

“So you’re saying she willed herself into a rock?”

“…damn, I wanna do that.”

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