Tatsumi’s friends bid him farewell in a dream at the start of this week’s episode, but he doesn’t want them to leave.After all, they’re supposed to be tomodachis for life, yo. In response, Saya tells Tatsumi that he can’t rely on them forever, so that, uh, settles that, I guess. Tatsumi then wakes up from his painful dream and clutches his head. My only question is, why are we only seeing this scene now? In fact, why didn’t we see this immediately after the first episode? If there had been more evidence of Tatsumi being depressed over his friends’ deaths, at least his actions in last week’s episode would’ve made some sense. Oh well, here we are again with yet another Akame ga Kill! episode.
— This week, Tatsumi finds himself under Sheele’s guidance. I wonder if we’re going to run through the entire gamut before the story finally gets going. I realize the chosen hero has to get stronger, and believe me, I don’t like it either when the protagonist starts off overpowered right from the get-go. Still, that doesn’t mean we can’t set the actual story in motion. Seriously, I don’t want to watch Night Raid go on yet another one-off, throwaway mission. Who cares about some serial killer? Who cares about one of the prime minister’s dinky relatives? Let’s get to the meat and potatoes already. Let’s put a real plan in motion to take down the evil empire.
— Sheele puts the kid to task by having him swim in a suit of armor. We then learn that Sheele can’t apparently do anything right…
…so how do we know she’s training Tatsumi properly?
— I like how even in the past, Sheele wore the exact same dress. Anime characters never change their clothes. Otherwise, the fanbase would stop recognizing them or something.
— Everyone’s got a tragic past, and Sheele does too. Somehow, this clumsy girl who can’t do anything right, can fight off a bunch of heavily-armed men on her own. I don’t quibble with the way she took down her friend’s abusive ex-boyfriend. After all, she stabbed him while he was distracted. But how on earth did she have the skills to fight off his friends as well? They take the time to train Tatsumi even though he was already a warrior to begin with. Meanwhile, this clumsy, shy-looking girl over here is jumping onto people’s backs like she’s in an Assassin’s Creed video game or some shit, and there isn’t any explanation as for why she has the physical capabilities to do such a thing. I mean, fine, she has the mental make-up to be a cold-hearted killer. I can see how someone could actually be born with such a innate trait. But c’mon, she can’t even bring food to people’s table without spilling it all over them, and you want to convince me that she’s a skilled fighter out of nowhere?
— Jealous that Tatsumi has been spending too much one-on-one time with Sheele, Bulat makes his triumphant entrance. Why do I get the feeling that he’s going to bite the dust? He’s close to the main character, but he’s not a hot anime babe. So if you kill him off, you get to maximize the tragedy points.
— Afterwards, Tatsumi gets to try on Zank’s Imperial Arms. Naturally, our hero uses it to see through the girl’s clothes:
I thought he was going to use it to read some juicy thoughts, but hey, it’s anime so fanservice trumps everything. Again, however, undergarments are impervious to the Imperial Arms’ impressive powers, but don’t worry. I’m sure a doujinshi out there will take care of that.
— In the end, however, the Imperial Arms rejected him. Why? Shrug. Just didn’t suit him. Can’t be explained. Intangibles. You’ve either got it or you don’t. Insert generic sports commentary here.
— According to Mine, “They say the first impression an Imperial Arms has of you matters.” Oh, they have minds now.
— According to Najenda, the strongest Imperial Arms has got to be–… I’m sorry, but I just don’t care. Really, who gives a shit? Furthermore, haven’t we talked about the Imperial Arms enough in last week’s episode? Do we really have to sit around and talk about them again? Is this what fans really want? To sit around and circlejerk over the power of these made-up weapons? Man, I can’t help but wonder how many fanfics have already been written where an “original” character joins Night Raid and just has the most ridiculously overpowered Imperial Arms ever. Bitch, I can fly, revive myself from the dead, and vaporize people from a mile away. Oh shit, is that you, Tatsuya?!
— Najenda then talks about how the empire is seeking to conquer a northern race, because its prince is a brilliant strategist who has never lost a battle. Watch him proceed to lose a battle. I just know it.
— Tatsumi is optimistic he can find an Imperial Arms with the power to resurrect the dead. Naturally, he would use it to save his former friends. Bulat tells him, however, that there’s no such thing, which pisses Tatsumi off. Clearly, our hero is still hung up on his friends’ deaths. So again, why didn’t we see this before? Seriously? This would’ve made so much more sense two or three episodes. Instead, I’m just sitting here, thinking, “Why now? You had your fucking chance to mourn their deaths.” Akame even tells him to get over it, ’cause otherwise, his enemies will use the weakness in his heart against him. Against him! Like, oh I don’t know… last week’s episode? Remember? Remember when Tatsumi stupidly followed an image of Saya even though he had seen her dead body firsthand? Gee, this dumbass move would’ve made complete sense if our hero had been depressed this entire time!
— Afterwards, Tatsumi sits alone and stares at the starry night sky with a heavy sadness in his heart. We should’ve seen a scene like this in the second episode.
— He starts to cry so Sheele embraces him. I’m beginning to think this episode won’t have any action. Oh well, it would’ve just been cheap, ugly action anyway.
— Oh hey, it’s the prince from the northern race that we just talked about. And oh hey, we’ve jinxed him, because he’s just lost a battle to that “woman” that Night Raid had also spoken of. Gee, who would’ve guessed…? Anyway, the proud prince is now naked, forced to lick that woman’s shoes while his people are impaled on pikes all around him…
— By the way, she is General Esdeath. Esdeath. With a name like that, I hope she dies and comes back as Neo-Esdeath. That would be killer. In any case, she apparently has the strongest Imperial Arms out there. The anime didn’t really explain why she’s so strong, though. All Najenda just says is that the woman can control ice. So? My fridge can control ice too, man. The woman then kills the northern prince with a single kick, disappointed that no one out there can satisfy her in combat. Hey… hey, have you met our main man Tatsumi over here? I bet he can satisfy you in combat. It’d be hilarious too if Tatsumi goes full Gary Stu on us, and somehow gets Esdeath of all people to fall in love with him. But honestly, that would be too stupid even for Akame ga Kill! It’d be the equivalent of Tatsuya’s aunt falling in love with him.
— It turns out more and more of the empire’s talented generals are defecting to the Revolutionary Army. But do they have Esdeath? Yeah, I didn’t think so. Not only that, the prime minister is calling Esdeath back just to deal with Night Raid. Really? A high-ranking general will be tasked with taking out a group of assassins? Plus, if she’s so fucking strong, why is she subservient to this disgusting, gluttonous fucker? In fact, they make everyone in this show strong as hell except for, y’know, the kid emperor and the prime minister himself. So why aren’t these generals vying for power? Why are they content to listen to these losers’ orders? I never understand it when evil, powerful people in fiction are loyal to weak bastards for no good reason.
— Tatsumi runs into Seryu, a member of the imperial police. For some reason, this lowly member of the imperial police also has an Imperial Arms, which is apparently a dog. Was this dog also forged out of orichalcum, too? I’m being facetious, by the way. But again, why would a random member of the imperial police just happen to have an Imperial Arms in her possession? Shouldn’t that raise Tatsumi’s suspicions? According to Seryu, they just gave her an Imperial Arms because no one else was compatible with the dog. But uh, so what if no one was compatible with the dog? You don’t just give a low-ranking officer a powerful weapon. My point is, Tatsumi’s already run into a crazy girl once. Aria, too, was cheerful and bubbly on the surface. I bet the anime dips back into this well again, and Seryu’s some sick, sadistic fuck too.
— Oh look, the girl wants to avenge Ogre, the evil bastard from episode two. She is crazy!