Summer 2014 Harem Hill, Week 7: Nothing but tsundere girls playing a poor man’s Pokemon

stuck shark

Yes, I am free of Rokujyoma no Shinryakusha!? forever. The voting was close…

week 6 results

…and a lot of you guys wanted me to keep watching that dreck, but in the end, cooler heads prevailed. So let’s just get on with our lives and laugh at Seirei Tsukai no Blade Dance until the new season begins.


— Fianna has a nightmare about her encounter with Claire’s sister, but we don’t really care about that, now do we?

— Nah, what we care about are three instances of the heroines being tsundere in just the first five minutes alone. Kamito has come to Fianna’s room to discuss their mission to the mining town (yeah, remember that little subplot?). Fianna, of course, teases him, but she is taken aback when he treats her nicely. As a result, she goes, “No, why…”

Seirei Tsukai no Blade Dance - 0701

Not to be beaten, Claire tries to listen in on the conversation. When Fianna tricks Kamito into saying something incriminating, Claire bursts into the room with her whip, and threatens to abuse the harem lead. Okay, we’ve got the tsuntsun part down. Where’s the deredere part?

Seirei Tsukai no Blade Dance - 0702

She doesn’t really hate him! She just wishes he’d pay attention to her and tiny chest, uguu. Elsewhere, Rinslet spots Kamito running off with Fianna, so she expresses how she suddenly feels agitated. When her maid teases her about liking Rinslet, she exclaims…

Seirei Tsukai no Blade Dance - 0703

Wow, so many tsunderekkos in one place. Whoever wrote this story just has a thing for girls abusing him. Naturally, the one girl who isn’t tsuntsun with the main character is the maid. Why? Well, she is the maid. Class matters, man. Why do you think tsunderekkos exist? And why do you think they are often strong or headstrong characters with a tragic past? Notice how Claire and Fianna are both nobles who have since been disgraced for one reason or another. Claire carries the burden of her sister’s transgressions. Meanwhile, Fianna can no longer summon her family’s guardian spirit, and as a result, she is ostracized for it. Rinslet has not been as prominent in the story as the other two, but her story’s no different. We’re not supposed to know this yet, but Rinslet is also related to a sister who has done something wrong and is thus cursed for her actions. I think Fahrenfart is the only one without a painfully contrived tragic past, but she nevertheless has a lot of pride to match her social rank.

Now, you might say it’s obvious why the maid isn’t tsundere. After all, she’s a maid, and they’re supposed to be submissive to their goshujin-assholes by default. But that’s not really the point I’m trying to make.

Rather, the larger point is that tsunderekkos only exist so that there can be successively torn down. Whether you’re literally of the noble class or just headstrong, the idea here is to bring you down to a level beneath the harem lead. The reason why the guy endures these girls’ punishment is because the story knows they will be weaker than him, so there’s the satisfaction of having turned the tables around on one’s former abuser. It is all the more special, of course, when your abuser is now a slave to fulfilling your every desire. But how is this often achieved? Well, these girls’ tragic pasts will catch up to them, and they’ll find themselves compelled to jump into the harem lead’s manly arms for his help. It’s why these girls are often from a higher class. We’re breaking class barriers, but in a rather misogynistic way. In the end, the differences in class don’t matter, because biotruths will eventually prevail and make the noble girl fall in love with the guy anyway. Resistance is futile. He is man and thus you want his cock.

The lack of any other male in the story is just pure laziness, because you’d have to justify why these girls are falling for the same harem lead. Some shows do pair the harem lead up with a best friend type character, but the latter is often offset by his extreme pervertedness, which makes it easy for the girls to shoot him down.

pretty bowlegs nowpokemon

— Anyway, for every instance of these characters being tsundere, I will post an equally tsundere shark. It’s the only way to restore balance to this universe.

— Rinslet and Claire proceed to have a deep conversation about breasts. Claire reveals that she had once gone into the forest to look for a large-breasted spirit, ’cause maybe said spirit could give her larger breasts. Sadly, such a spirit doesn’t exist. Great stuff, you guys. Rinslet, however, claims that she knows of a way, but she’ll only reveal it if Claire does something for her. You’ll find out later that Rinslet really only wants to accompany Claire on this mission to the mining town. So y’know, Rinslet is being tsuntsun about her true feelings, and you know what that means:

everyone's looking shark

— Elsewhere, the harem lead finally remembers who Fianna is, and this is what it took:

Seirei Tsukai no Blade Dance - 0704Seirei Tsukai no Blade Dance - 0705

She may have had the same face this entire time, but guys don’t pay attention to your face, girls! It’s the hair!

— When Kamito asks Fianna why she’s come to this school, she tries to tease him: “But I wanted to make out with you, of course.” Naturally, her teasing backfires on her:

Seirei Tsukai no Blade Dance - 0706

Oh! Is that a girl being tsundere? Shark time!

moustache

— Like everyone else, Fianna wants to win the Blade Dance. And because she knows that the harem lead was once Ren Ashbell, she wants to use his strength help her win. And what’s in it for her? “I’d get my position and my honor back.” Fianna wonders why, however, the harem lead doesn’t seem to mind the fact that she’s using him. Well, why should he mind? He’s already won. Like I’ve said, the once proud princess needs the lowly harem lead’s help. Biotruths win out. He needs nothing else. This is the kind of story we’re in, after all. In a world where 99% of the elementalers are women, it’s a guy who won the last Blade Dance. I mean, c’mon. It doesn’t get any more obvious than that.

— Fahrenfart shows up, because she’s also headed for the mining town. Why? She needs to restore faith to the Sylphids, because the Jio guy from last week’s episode had embarrassed them. It’s not quite a tragic past, but again, you have a female character who has been disgraced. At the moment, she thinks she can solve the problem all by herself, but she’ll soon need Kamito’s help.

— If you’ve been wondering about Rinslet’s secret breast-enlargening secret, it’s nothing you haven’t heard before: “…you just need to get the guy you like to rub them.” Just typical anime bullshit. Naturally, Claire can’t help but fantasize about Kamito rubbing her breasts:

Seirei Tsukai no Blade Dance - 0707

Oh, that tsuntsun girl showing her deredere side…

urinal shark

— Claire wonders if she could just rub her own breasts to do the trick, but she starts moaning as she does so. Uh-huh, every woman has a near-orgasm every time anything even touches their breasts. Why do you suppose they wear bras? But unfortunately for the red-headed girl, Kamito suddenly walks in on her at this exact moment, then immediately walks out.

— The day of the mission arrives, but you’d never know it anyway. The entire group, which consists of Kamito, Claire, Rinslet, and Fianna, spends most of their time arguing. Basically, Fianna clings to the harem lead the entire time, and the other girls aren’t even subtle about their displeasure.

— Eventually, the group comes across Fahrenfart getting her ass kicked by that Jio dude deep within the mines. Oh well, what else is new?

Seirei Tsukai no Blade Dance - 0708

— There’s not much to say about the fight. Just two boring characters rubbing their swords up against each other. Since the fight ends on a cliffhanger, we’ll just wrap up the post here.


Anyway, I think it’s much better that I don’t blog another second of Rokujyoma no Shinryakusha!? Harem Hill is about breaking down what makes harem anime so flawed, not boring the shit out of myself because some anime thinks it’s funny.

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6 thoughts on “Summer 2014 Harem Hill, Week 7: Nothing but tsundere girls playing a poor man’s Pokemon”

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