Yeah… just yeah…
So Toru finally gives up on being a saboteur. Why? Because Chaika has lost her will to live. As a result, Toru wants to kill Gaz. Unfortunately, Gaz is overpowered so…
Hey, why don’t we just form that contract with Frederica that we’ve been hinting at all season long! But what gets me is that this doesn’t even accomplish anything. Yes, Toru gets stronger, but it’s only good for taking out Shin:
What bothers me here is that Shin’s death comes with practically no fanfare. He just dies. Hell, the duel between them wasn’t even good. And as he slumps to the ground, he’s all like, “Heh, I knew you weren’t cut out to be a saboteur anyway!” What should’ve been an emotional moment for Toru boils down to a throwaway line. And that’s because we must hurry. Hurry, hurry, let’s move onto the next scene already! Huh? You want to know why Shin was working for Gaz? You want more closure with the guy who had a hand in raising Toru? You want some meaningful lesson for Toru to take away from this incident? Sorry, but we have no time! Even so, we’re getting ahead of ourselves. Let’s rewind a bit. Let’s rewind back to the part where Gaz has multiple satellites orbiting the planet:
Cool, huh? They’re all Guys or something. I don’t really know, and I don’t really care. How did he get these satellites up there? Magic, duh! And you know how it goes. The only reason why Toru can even get inside one of Gaz’s impenetrable floating castles is because the guy lets him in. It’s so stupid and lazy. How more cliche can you get?
Meanwhile, Chaika continues to take pointless potshots at the castle with her dinky gun. C’mon, why are you just wasting precious ammo? Keep this bit of information in mind. Anyway, we already know what Gaz is after. He wants to absorb everyone’s feelings and memories, because magic owns or something. And then what? What is he going to do later with all that magic and an empty planet? Nah, we don’t have an answer for you. Just don’t even worry about it!
So we have a multi-front battle. Akari, Vivi, and Red Chaika get to battle Black Chaika, but it’s only to give them something to do. The outcome here makes no difference in the grand scheme of things. As such, who cares if Black Chaika is defeated? I certainly don’t.
We cut back to Toru who has finally reached Gaz. The old man thus prattles on and on about human nature. Here’s what a 500-year-old mind has to say:
“…I have reached a conclusion. Humans forever seek war. Humans kill other humans for anger, for hatred, and for love. A hundred, even two hundred years later, humans will kill one another for the most trivial of reasons.”
Hoo boy! Half a millennium on this goddamn planet, and this is the best that he can come up with. Some humans have killed out of anger, hatred, love, blah blah blah. As a result, you assholes all want war! Trust me, I have a Ph.D in behavioral science. Anyway, he does that cliche villain thing where he asks Toru to join his side. Naturally, Toru turns him down, so the battle begins in earnest… eh, not exactly.
As you can see here, he starts off by chopping Frederica up into little pieces. But it’s not like it matters anyway. She’s recovered from so many “near-death moments” that the effect is lost on us. You just know that she’ll survive this somehow. You have to be willfully dumb or naive if you think Frederica is actually in any danger.
As for Toru, he takes a beating, because again, Gaz is overpowered. So what are we going to do, guys? What are we going to do?! That’s easy! You just have to wait for the villain to make a critical mistake! They always make boneheaded decisions like that! And here, we have Gaz opening up his castle for no reason whatsoever.
Why? Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy? In any case, this allows Chaika to save both Toru and Frederica. As a result, Gaz wants to eliminate Chaika no. 357 once and for all. All of a sudden, Niva Lada refuses to follow Gaz’s orders. Instead, she floats to Chaika’s side. Why? Uh…
I guess Chaika is her friend or something. But they’ve barely spent any time together, so it’s hard to see why Niva Lada would not only care so much about Chaika, she even helps the girl defeat her own master. Oh well! Time to transform into a gun again!
Gaze upon my butthole, Chaika! But ah… there’s just one small problem. Chaika is out of ammo. Gosh, if only someone hadn’t wasted all their ammo shooting at nothing… Anyway, Chaika uses the next best thing: her memories.
The big blast kills Gaz, Chaika screams out in pain, Toru holds her lifeless body and cries… and… that’s it? That’s it. The big bad Gaz is defeated just like that. Well, um, good show, everyone? Wait, wait, he’s not really dead just like that, is he? C’mon! Help me out, Alveric! Fill me in on the details! I mean, there’s nothing quite like listening to exposition about the big, bad villain’s demise, right?
“Five years after war’s end, after continuing to threaten the continent even following his death, the taboo emperor, Gaz, used the remains gathered by the Chaikas to return to life using magic, but destroyed himself shortly after. He and the floating fortresses vanished completely.”
In other words…
Well, what about our heroes? After all, there are interesting implications to consider. How did Toru, for instance, recover from all of his injuries? And Chaika used her memories, so maybe she is dea–… nah, if they wouldn’t kill Frederica, there’s no way they’d kill Chaika. Okay, maybe she’ll have forgotten all about Toru!
Eh, if she has, I don’t see it. Nope, no bittersweet ending here. Just happy fun times for everyone! Well… what about Red Chaika! What will she do now?! Her mission was to get revenge, right? So how she’s adapting?
Uh, I guess she’s now joined Toru’s harem. As for her previous partners… shrug. They’ve just disappeared like a fart in the wind. You don’t even need to ask what Akari as been up to–…
…yeah. Wait, wait, how ’bout Frederica! Are there troubling implications with regards to Toru forming a contract with the dragoon?
No. She’s just a cute kitty chasing after a butterfly! Woo! As for Niva Lada, a.k.a. Miss “I have personality,” here she is…
…showing off all that personality. Good stuff, you guys. Good stuff. I sure am glad Bones took their time to make this anime! But now that the show has ended early, what am I going to do with my Wednesday nights? Well, that Princess Kaguya thing just got subbed…