Absolute Duo Ep. 6: I hurt you because I love you

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This is probably one of the show’s worst episode yet. Somehow, we’ve gone from a giant coliseum designed for this sort of direct combat to… well… a mall. Why? Perhaps it makes for an exciting setting. After all, plenty of zombie movies take place in a mall, and these characters are about as lively as a pack of zombies. Unfortunately, Lilith could only afford to rent out the mall and nothing more. As a result, the entire place is shrouded in darkness because electricity is hard to come by. Even if a mall is an excellent battleground, it’s not like anyone could tell anyway. Every single scene is shrouded in complete darkness.

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Well…

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The combat sucks anyway. For some reason, Lilith is just faster than everyone, smarter than everyone, blah blah blah.

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She’s also a master of disguise, i.e. she can wear a wig.

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In the first half of the episode, every time Thor and Lilith have their little skirmishes, Julie has to have this slightly concerned look on her face. Why? Meh, it’s not really worth talking about. She’s just insecure that she might not be a good enough Duo for Thor, so she pushes herself extra hard. Lame stuff, really. Plus, it makes Julie come across as a potential Stage 5 Clinger. I bet she goes yandere at some point in the story.

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No, please… just let it be over.

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At some point, the power of teamwork manages to overcome Lilith. That doesn’t mean she’s down for the count or anything. It just means that Thor and his band of misfits manage to land a single hit. A single one.

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But before the battle can resume, these cheap Master Chief knockoffs show up out nowhere. They even shoot at people with real bullets. So all that hubbub about Lilith brandishing a gun a few weeks ago? Forget about it. Here’s a bunch of heavily-armored idiots shooting at high school students. Why? Who are they? The leader simply says, “We come bearing an invitation from Equipment Smith, master armorer.” Clever name. And I have no idea who that is. I don’t really care either.

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Anyway, an injured Lilith is forced to go with the Master Chiefs. Even though Thor doesn’t want to partner up with the girl, he won’t let anyone else steal his haremette. Every harem lead is selfish.

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So using more teamwork power… they get Lilith back. Great.

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The Master Chief in charge, however, pulls a Carrie on us, so I guess he’s going to be a series-long villain or some shit.

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But forget him! Because we still have a duel to finish! They’ve both been shot at with actual bullets, but it’s okay! No need to treat your wounds or anything! No need to report the existence of those Master Chiefs to anyone else either! ‘Cause we have a score to settle! This is, after all, the only way that Thor and Lilith can truly understand each other. Yes, that’s right. They’re fighting upon Thor’s insistence, because laying everything on the line is the only way two people can hope to relate to one another. No wonder marriages are at an all time low… people aren’t fighting enough!

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Afterwards, you find Thor all bandaged up in a hospital bed. Yeah, you can only have true love if your spouse puts you in the hospital.

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No, really, Lilith is in love with the guy now.

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Nobody ever dates anymore. They just hit each other until they fall in love. Good stuff.

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20 thoughts on “Absolute Duo Ep. 6: I hurt you because I love you”

  1. His shield is a metaphor for his manhood, obviously.

    You have to wait for him to choose a girl before he can REVEAL HIS TRUE POTENTIAL.

    1. I meant to say it’ll grow bigger once he does that.

      “Shield us with your dick!” is a phrase that has been uttered before, I believe.

  2. You know it really is disturbing to correlate the warrior mindset with romance to THAT extreme.
    -A dual so two fighters can better understand one another and themselves? Sure! In the proper context it’s fine (unlike here, after being shot at and kidnapped).
    -The rivalry of two warriors unwittingly leading to friendship and then love? Also fine.
    -The absolute domination of one warrior over the other, to the point of leaving them cripple in the hospital, ending in the victor laying marital claim over the other? That-That’s kinda fucked up, man…

    Haha! Harem anime is twisted all around.

  3. I remember the day I met my girlfriend several years ago. She powerbombed me on the hood of a car, we’ve been together ever since

  4. I bet you that Lilith, like any other lame harem girl who is disgustingly overpowered for no reason, will be brought down to the same level as everyone else now. (seriously, couldn’t help rolling my eyes seeing her beat all the second and first graders with the exception of the characters we know, very few characters can pull that off and be taken seriously). Also this episode felt like if it skipped one completely which is expected in this crap. Also, I’ve never seen such a lame ass way to get Lilith in a situation in which Thor has to save her like the appearance of the armored dudes. Those random ass characters wearing lame armors just came out of nowhere, with no hints beforehand, no explained motivation, nothing.
    Also, I’m starting to hate nigh battles in anime, since most of them are just freaking there to blacken the screen and be as lazy as possible.

    1. I have to say, there’s a huge gap in power between this leveling system.

      Lv.1 = Pathetic nobodies
      Lv. 2 = OP
      Lv. 3 = Kirito

    2. Yeah she’s ridiculously overpowered, especially in the LN, here they had to beat her to win, but in the LN they had to shatter a rose she has attached to her uniform to win, that’s the way Thor won against her, I don’t know if she remained that strong for the rest of the LN because I got bored shortly after.
      They skipped a lot of things like why the fuck those armored guys even appeared in the first place, and why they’re so strong, but I think they will explain everything later in a infodumping monologue or something like that.

  5. It looks like the budget demanded that the team take depths to the Eighth Ring of Dante’s Inferno.

    I recall asking myself “Why. Why. Why?” through this episode. Nothing of this episode made practical sense. Just why?
    But it’s no real consequence. If the organic being in this anime universe confirms itself as “female” then it will no doubt attach itself to the “beta male” despite its circumstances. Just the rules of nature.

    I’m just watching this show to see how crude it can get. Anime Crash incoming? Well, I don’t wanna see this blog take a hiatus but I hope that at least some quality stuff can come out of it.

  6. Man.. what’s with all these anime? What’s up with the writers?.. I don’t get it.
    Well, at least there’s always one or two anime that stand out from the crowd. But I just cannot understand what does this crap sells to the audience…

  7. The MC always has to let out a yell about making a promise. Then he is ready to risk his life in battle but freaks out like a retard the second a girls hand brushes against his hand. Are the Japanese such sissy men in real life?

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