Owari no Seraph Ep. 7: I want to kill vampires

Owari no Seraph - 0701

So Yuichiro still has survivor’s guilt, yadda yadda yadda. It all comes back to the writing, though:

Owari no Seraph - 0702

Good lord, this is truly amazing stuff. Look here, look. This little kid that’s haunting you. Yeah, it’s literally the darkness inside you. What’s that? This still isn’t clear enough?!

— When the hero comes to, it’s time for his very first mission:

Owari no Seraph - 0703

Not even like, “Don’t worry, Mika. I will avenge you.” Not even like, “I will atone for my sins.” Hell, you could even be a little more direct and do, “I will soon paint the rubbles of my nation red with the blood of those accursed vampires.” Nope, just literally, “I get to go kill vampires!”

Owari no Seraph - 0704

— Yes, even the trains are still running in post-apocalyptic Japan.

Owari no Seraph - 0705

— Trouble lurks in Shinjuku? Nah. My first test lies ahead? Nah. Again, it’s literally “I get to kill vampires?!” I mean, it’s not like the lines that I’m coming with are brilliant, original or anything. but at least it’s not “KILL KILL KILL KILL.”

— At one point, Shinoa casually mentions that she has a sister, then just as casually, she adds that her sister is dead. Fantastic stuff.

— As Yuichiro and Shinoa enter the outside world, she says, “…there isn’t anyone left who hasn’t lost somebody important.” Ooh, heavy. Good thing we still got our dank high school, though. Losing loved ones is just a small setback. Had the high school been destroyed, that would’ve been a true tragedy.

Owari no Seraph - 0708

— What’s also a true tragedy is that we had to wait this fucking long for the anime to finally introduce the tsuntsun blonde girl with twintails. Step it up, Owari no Seraph. You’re not going to be the next Attack on Titan if you keep lollygagging.

Owari no Seraph - 0709

— Straight and to the point. Just how I like it! Gon’ beat you up, son! Gonna kill some vampires while I’m at it, too. X GON’ GIVE IT TO YA!

Owari no Seraph - 0710

— Guren decides that now’s a good time to crack down on his well-trained soldiers by choking them. Yeah, this is about as heavy as Attack on Titan.

— Shinoa tells Yuichiro not to fuck things up and thus endanger the squad. He openly says that he can’t promise anything. Truly, this is a brutal world that we must take seriously. You never know when danger might strik–

Owari no Seraph - 0712

Twintail kick! Why? Just to test his reflexes. And if he had been too slow, they would’ve been down a man, BUT THAT’S JUST FINE WHO NEEDS BODIES WHEN MOST OF THE WORLD IS DEAD.

— Finally, the kids reach their assigned area where they proceed to stand aimlessly around, because this is productive…

Owari no Seraph - 0714

…case in point, a loli rounds a corner with this giant thing in tow. Oddly enough, no one heard it coming even though you’d think something like that would be heard from a mile away…

— Loli’s about to eat it, so our hero of course jumps into danger in order to save her. Everyone else is against it, though, because like, this is the oldest trick in the book. Literally the oldest trick. Y’see, if you stand as five in your assigned area, you’ll be perfectly safe. But if you try to save the loli as five by moving twenty feet over here…

Owari no Seraph - 0716

…that’s where the vampires truly get you!!!

— It’s okay, though. Those were, like, second-rate vampires. So at the end of the day, the kids manage to save the loli and retreat to safety.

— Blondie tries to give Yuichiro a good scolding. At first, he says he has no regrets. After all, he’d never let a poor loli die. But then he says he’s sorry. H-how can you be sorry if you don’t even regret your actions? What are you even sorry for? Truly astounding dialogue. #sorrynotsorry

— Twintailie then goes up to the loli and tells the latter that she’ll be protected from now on by the Imperial Demon Army. She didn’t want to save the girl earlier, though…

— As tsuntsunko stomps off, Shinoa flat out says, “Mitsuba has a dark past.” Well, there you go. Once again, we don’t mince words. The girl literally has a dark past.

— And just as soon as Shinoa tells Yuichiro that Mitsuba’s dark past is a secret, we get to learn all about it!

Owari no Seraph - 0722

— Meh, someone died trying to protect her reckless ass. Ho-hum.

Owari no Seraph - 0723

— Premium milk. From premium cows. That graze on premium grass. On premium cattle farms. In this premium not-destroyed world. Packaged by premium factories, too!

Owari no Seraph - 0724

— As a reward, the loli tells our kids where to find more orphans just like her, so I guess that’s where we’re headed next. I just like how we had to retreat this week because we were behind enemy lines, but we’re literally going to go into the belly of the beast in next week’s episode. Keep on shinin, you brilliant bastard of a show.


6 Replies to “Owari no Seraph Ep. 7: I want to kill vampires”

  1. “— Premium milk. From premium cows. That graze on premium grass. On premium cattle farms. In this premium not-destroyed world. Packaged by premium factories, too!”

    Brilliant. Never change E minor

  2. I can’t be the only one that thinks that the coolness-factor of “teen with big weapon” is totally gone right? Like that fucking axe; not even Conan the Barbarian Arnold would use that thing. This shit is pants on head retarded. Girls with big weapon isn’t moe and hasn’t been for a long time.
    Not that katana is any better: Nothing screams “MAIN CHARACTER” and “NIPPONJIN” like a katana on standard shounen boy. Way to completely fall into the shounen anime trap like a fuckin’ chump.

    Here’s a solution: Guns. Guns are cooler, WAY cooler than animu-blades. This is supposed to be a modern-future setting isn’t it? A setting where, uh, the human population had dwindled significantly? Where humanity at long last needs all the people it can get? Yeah, a great time to engage in close combat and get slaughtered; makes TOTAL sense.

    This is the way I see it. I don’t care how special snowflake you and your powers are and how great and how many animu-frame slashes you can do with your special snowflake sword. GUNS will increase that tenfold without debate.
    I don’t even care if you dual wield pistols like a fuckin’ Dante-clone, but at least that’s fresher than MUH AWESUM SWURD.

    People keep comparing this to Attack on Titan, but guess what? They HAVE to use swords in that show because they’re in the Goddamn fantasy-medieval setting. No one’s going to go zip around with cannons or a single-shot musket. Yeah, in that case, I’m all for swords.
    But in this show? Where they got DEMON WEAPONS? Holy shit, anything’s up for sale. How about Demon guns where you literally just shoot things to death with demonic bullets a la Shadows of the Damned? That shit is nuts and awesome.

    I honestly don’t care about anything else about show, maybe other than vampires again being bishi and not horrifyingly intimidating. But that’s been happening for a while now. Bram Stoker has flipped around in his casket by how many people have jumped on top of it.

  3. So its not ok for the vamps to use people as livestock to drink from, BUT it is ok to enslave cows as livestock? Shockingu. What a betrayal of values – what a uragiri of values.

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