Spoiler: I probably won’t keep watching these shows.
Plus-sized Misadventures in Love!
I’m not really sure what message this first episode is trying to convey. Basically, Yumeko, our plus-sized heroine, used to be really down on herself, because let’s face it, society isn’t generally kind to fat people. I’m told it’s even worse in certain Asian cultures; I had a Korean ex who told me some horror stories. So what do we do? Well, Yumeko gets into an accident — she tried to kill herself? — so now she’s forgotten everything including the enmity she feels for her own body. Having a positive outlook is great and all, but I’m not sure erasing your memories, especially via a major trauma to the head, is the way to go. Hot take, I know. But fine, it’s an exaggerated way to set up the story. Obviously, no one’s going to watch this anime and start jumping in front of cars.
But as I continue watching the episode, I feel like it is flip-flopping on its own message. Look, I’m all for people being comfortable in their own skin. Just because Yumeko is plus-sized doesn’t mean she deserves scorn. Again, another super hot take, I know. But then we get a gag where Yumeko eats her coworker’s food without their permission. Huh? If we want to say that being plus-sized can be a positive choice, it seems weird to then joke about her impulse control. But that’s not all! Near the end of the episode, she gets stuck in a bathroom stall and can’t get out unless she turns herself sideways. Bro, be real. She’s not morbidly obese, and no bathroom stall is that small. More importantly, are we cheering for Yumeko or mocking her? Make up your mind. This show doesn’t seem to know what it wants to be.
Hands off: Sawaranaide Kotesashi-kun
Basically, Koyo’s got the magic touch. Somehow, his massages can instantly heal your body. You might protest, but before you even know it, your body’s been handled and our hero fucks off never to be seen again. He’s like Batman but with body therapy and body therapy only. He’s the groper you deserve, but not the groper you need. Anyway, I assume his special gift works for all genders, but this is anime, so you’ll probably only ever see him touch cis women. Men don’t need help. Men can touch themselves. And by women, I mean high school girls.
Alright, to be fair, he doesn’t touch the high school girls without their consent. Usually. You know how touchy anime protagonists can get when they trip and fall. This show’s premise feels like something straight out of a hentai manga. We even get a crotch shot seconds into the episode. Then look at the way the anime emphasizes this poor lady’s ass. It doesn’t even look like it’s attached to her torso anymore. Dude, c’mon, how am I supposed to get turned on by this body horror? Eventually, we get an uncensored nipple, so it’s one of those shows. Gotta laugh at the censored vagina, though. That’s a bridge too far, I suppose.
This is just your average harem romcom with an ecchi flair. It’s got all the basic tropes. Koyo has to live in the dorms with a bunch of girls, he gets an offer he can’t refuse so he can’t leave even if he wanted to, he’ll have sexy, totally unintended run-ins with them every episode, maybe even trip and grope them on the way down (I told you that he was the groper you deserve), the girls can’t deny that he’s a positive presence in their lives even if some of them are initially suspicious of him, they’ll all develop feelings for him but he’s a dense anime male, yadda yadda yadda. Most importantly, the girls are aroused when Koyo treats them.
You could argue that these characters are touch-starved in a culture that represses physical intimacy. Oftentimes, I’ll watch two anime characters share a tender moment, and it would be the perfect moment for them to at least give each other a hug. Friends can hug, right? But we never get that. Well, these are teenagers with hormones being touched by another teenager with hormones. I’m told it’s just a natural physiological response! Having said that, I doubt this show will end up being a poignant or insightful study of sexuality or anything like that. Again, it’s just your typical ecchi harem romcom. So whatever.
Ultimately, if you’re gonna show me boobs, at least draw them right. These look like bolted-on fakes. Real breasts don’t defy gravity like that. I look at these ecchi shows the same way I look at strip clubs: if I want to get off, there are simply better ways to get the job done. Why pick an inferior option?
