True to my word, I will no longer be covering A Livid Lady’s Guide to Getting Even. Why? To echo the great Kirk Lazarus, you’re not supposed to go full villainess! Sure, look like a villainess, act like a villainess, but don’t actually become a villainess. But I digress. Let’s hope the rest of the women in this post can make up for Elizabeth’s blunder.
Though I Am an Inept Villainess Ep. 7
Ugh, Keigetsu has unfortunately learned nothing. As soon as she wakes up and hears all about Reirin’s selfless act, Keigetsu lashes out: “I will not be fooled!” Girl, you might not be a good person deep down, but you should at least try and act like one. The court ladies are at least right about her lacking grace. Villains get to the top by backstabbing you with a smile, but she can’t even do that correctly. Better yet, literally just stop being evil. Like, you don’t have to be a saint who takes in orphans and nurses injured puppies, but holy shit, just let go of your jealousy and… I dunno, go read a damn book or something. The crown prince’s dick game probably isn’t even all that amazing.
In the midst of all that crying, however, Keigetsu realizes something is off: the bow shouldn’t cure maladies. It’s a bow of warding, i.e. it should only work on curses. In other words, someone was trying to kill her via Venomcraft. An incense burner suddenly breaks and shatters, revealing the shadow of the curse, which quickly dissipates. Said incense burner was apparently a gift from the Kin clan. But Seika already told Reirin that she knows nothing about a Lady Gayou. Assuming she isn’t lying, who’s plottin’ and schemin’ in the background? Well, it could still be someone from the Kin clan. Seika is merely a Maiden, after all. Maybe Reiga, the pure consort, is up to no good.
My only issue with Reirin — and this might seem nitpicky — is that she’s so positive, it makes her feel almost one-dimensional. Basically, her positivity makes her predictable. You always know how she’s going to act or react, ’cause she’ll always take the highest road possible. Her only flaw was something out of her control (her weak constitution), but she doesn’t even have that to worry about anymore! The only other thing that comes close to a flaw was when she kept drawing the bowstring last week to her own detriment. But ultimately, nothing really came of this. All that happened was that she needed to sleep and recover. Don’t flaws make us interesting, though? Of course, you don’t want to be a tragically flawed character, but flaws are the special sauce that makes a character’s narrative journey worth tracking. Well, I’ve been watching Reirin for seven weeks now, and I’m not sure if there’s anything that she needs to change or improve. She’s practically perfect. She always knows what to say or what to do. For instance, she delivers an airtight argument to prevent Tousetsu from killing herself: “It is vastly more difficult to live a healthy life than to die. If you wish for atonement, please do not choose an easy death to fulfill it.” Welp, Villainess Jesus has it covered, boys. Wrap it up. Nothing to see here.
We eventually see a meeting between the empress and the various women of the four clans, except both Keigetsu and Reirin aren’t there for obvious reasons. Nevertheless, the show goes on without them, and some of the women do not hesitate to lob thinly veiled insults. The empress ends up having to directly scold Reiga for going too far, insinuating that the woman moans too loudly during sex. Sheesh. But I guess the empress is a no-nonsense type of woman. Apparently, she was somewhat of a tomboy during her time as a maiden. I still can’t believe these women’s whole existence is to just sit around and wait for some guy to bang them. Ugh. My distaste for this setting really drags down my enjoyment of the show (and similar series). It was fine when Reirin basically became a farmer for a couple episodes, and it looked like the crown prince wanted nothing to do with her. But now that we’re back to the “intrigue” of the inner court, I just can’t help but feel like dry heaving. Unfortunately, the empress falls ill, too. When the meeting is adjourned, she suddenly collapses from a curse. She had just wondered to herself if Gabi still resented her for winning the title of empress back in the day. Ahhh… like I said, inner court drama is of little interest to me. If you’re going to curse someone, at least do it for a compelling reason. All I see here is rampant jealousy.
The Forsaken Saintess and Her Foodie Roadtrip in Another World Ep. 8
Rin fishes up a mad otter, which is apparently a very tasty species. Bro, no, don’t eat otters! They just returned to the Bronx River for the first time in a hundred years! Sadly, our ravenous saintess makes a stew out of the poor animal.
So people have eaten otters before, but it’s clearly not a common practice. Why? Like a lot of wild animals, it’s gamey, fishy, tough, so on and so forth. A stew is the right call for a tough cut of meat, but I still wouldn’t touch it for all the other unappetizing qualities. But this show is pure fantasy, so they just make the otter meat look like a well-marbled steak. Sure, sure.
Rin then adds trout roe to her bowl of rice. It might be fantasy trout, but this is still a classic Japanese pairing. I personally am not a fan of fish eggs outside of caviar. Rin can claim all she wants that it’s not fishy, but I can taste it. Caviar, on the other hand, doesn’t have that fishiness. It’s actually quite buttery and creamy by comparison.
The party then makes a pit stop at a town that specializes in a special salt that comes from (of course) their hot springs. For her meal, Rin enjoys a steamed bird dish that usually comes with a sizable portion of the spring salt. This time, however, the restaurant only has an herb salt on hand. We’ll get to why in a bit, because I wanna talk about the food first. Unless it’s dim sum, steaming food isn’t really my preference. It often just leaves the food looking and tasting wet and slimy. That’s actually what they go for in a lot of dim sum, which is fine. I like har gow and siu mai as much as any basic bitch dim sum enjoyer. But I’ll pass on steaming my chicken.
Unfortunately, we have to pretend that this show is more than just a cooking show, so the party has to investigate a situation that threatens the town. In fact, it’s so bad that all the local adventurers have been wiped out. Sounds like we have a crisis on our hands, so it’s a bit odd that everyone in town is just going about their daily lives without a care in the world. Well, Smorgasbord will happily take the quest.
Before we can solve the problem, Rin gives her party a quick tutorial on how to whip up miso mayonnaise. I like mayo, so no real complaints from me. But before she can use it on anything, a dragon swoops down and snatches her away. It seems to think she is her caretaker. Lemme guess, you’ll eat an otter but not this dragon? It’ll probably just become another pet.
The Oblivious Saint Can’t Contain Her Power Ep. 9
Oh man, this episode was so unintentionally funny. Carolina and Monica face off in the selection exam (along with two other jobbers), but the kingdom treats it like a sporting event. You have an MC as well as a giant stadium full of spectators. It’s as embarrassing as it is ridiculous. But it gets better. For the first round, they march in a bunch of injured men. In order to move onto the next round, you gotta heal your patient! This is the problem, isn’t it? Rather than hold this ridiculous dog and pony show, every single candidate should be going out there, healing and saving people. Well, guess what? The jobbers are disqualified, because they couldn’t fully heal their patients. So… uh… did Carolina and Monica proceed to heal them, or did those unlucky suckers have to limp out of the stadium because both drew short straws?
In the second round, Carolina and Monica have to race to see who can purify a tank of muddy water. Where does the mud go? Muddy water just means there is dirt, silt, clay, or whatever mixed in with the water. When these girls work their magic, where does all that matter go? Into the rift betwixt reality? Unsurprisingly, Carolina has no trouble whatsoever purifying her water tank. In fact, she should be out there, cleaning rivers and lakes, saving crops from pestilence and blight, healing and saving the poor, etc. She shouldn’t be wasting her time here!
Monica is clearly losing. Even the evil bishop’s special medicine can’t close the gap between her and Carolina. So she goes mad and literally tries to choke Carolina out. Yep, in front of the entire kingdom. Ah man, she was already a noblewoman living the high life. All she had to do was just stay in her lane. Alas… The best part was when Gilbert tells Monica off: “Being a sore loser is unsightly, you know?” Right, right, her lack of sportsmanship is the problem, not the attempted murder.
In the aftermath, Monica is stripped of her nobility and sentenced to jail. Evil bishop Jonathan is also arrested and found guilty for the murder of Celestia’s previous saint. Whoa, whoa, whoa, hold your horses, guys! It’s only the ninth episode. Sure, Fiora has been chosen to represent Celestia in the upcoming Saintly Trials, but c’mon, how many episodes is that going to take? We need to save some story for the rest of the season!
The funny thing is, the show’s title alone conveys a story with some potential. Until recently, Carolina couldn’t quite control her powers, right? Imagine if too much of a good thing — too much divinity — can end up making the situation worse. For example, maybe in combating pestilence, Carolina kills every bug in the area, which disrupts the ecosystem (and prevents pollination). Maybe her healing too many people leads to them acting and behaving recklessly, because they think their saint can just heal or revive them? There are avenues you can explore with this story that don’t have to be dull and lifeless. Ah well.
All Works Maid Ep. 10
In a lot of isekai series, when one reincarnator confronts another one, it’s like, “Aw, cool, they’re finally in the know!” It could be the shittiest anime in the world, but I still get that brief feeling for a moment. After all, a tiny bit of the status quo has been shattered. Unfortunately, you don’t get that joy here. Melody has already played dumb with Anna-Marie, but she’s playing dumb again with Micah, the new orphan-girl-turned-maidservant. You might say, “Well, if other shows all do the same thing, wouldn’t it be better for All Works Maid to buck the trend?” Buck it for what, though? Think about what playing dumb accomplishes: nothing. Luckily, Micah isn’t completely stupid. She knows Melody is the heroine regardless of the latter’s denials. She’s not like Anna-Marie, who still stumbles around, going, “Durr, where da heroine at? Where could she be!”
Anyway, the drama this week is so toothless. Some girl lurking in the shadows (probably Olivia) is getting super jealous over Luciana spending time with Maxwell. Bjork then comes in outta nowhere and brainwashes her. Easy to exploit a tainted heart, I suppose. She is now the “Jealous Witch” who is doing things like vandalizing classrooms in an attempt to frame Luciana. I don’t think I can muster up a single care about any of this. It’s just so boring. I actually had to watch this part at 3x speed in order to preserve my sanity. Ultimately, Micah wants to use her game knowledge to resolve this incident and thus prevent the end of the world, so she begs her employers to let her attend the school. Alright, sure. Anna-Marie sure ain’t doing shit, so we might as well put all of the burden on the orphan.
