In case you didn’t know.
Goodbye, Lara Ep. 12
Well, the show certainly lives up to its title. Still, I can’t believe we went through all that just for Lara to leave in the end. In fact, I think the ending is quite baffling:
“I still want to be in this world! Because this world… has you. I… I… I… I don’t need true love! All I want… all I’ll ever want… is to be in a world… with you!”
So she loves Mari… and she loves the world that has Mari… but she’s still leaving? She still won’t acknowledge that Mari is her true love? Even Mari has no clue why Lara has to go. But when she asks our mermaid-turned-human, she doesn’t get an answer. Our heroine does, however, answer Luca in a previous scene regarding her future plans and/or destination: “I guess… a place where a new light is waiting for me.” What? Look, I could understand it if Lara came to the decision that she needs to be on her own and find herself, but if that’s the case, why not say so? Why be non-committal about it? But I guess that’s how I feel about this story in a nutshell: just thoroughly non-committal about, well, everything. Even true love, it would seem! Mari is left with a vague feeling that she might see Lara again some day, and I’m sorry, but that is such bullshit.
Sure, you never know where life will take you. People like to say that if two people are truly soul mates, they’ll find their way back to each other in the end. They find this notion very romantic. I’m sorry, but I don’t agree. First, I don’t even believe in soul mates. C’mon, there are billions of people on this planet. My soul mate just happens to be someone I randomly bump into within my metro area? Nah. Second, in my mind, love is first and foremost an action. I don’t believe you can truly love someone like this. You are not building a life with them, sharing moments with them, growing and evolving with them, so on and so forth. When there is not just physical but mental distance as well — I’m not dismissing long distance relationships — you no longer love them. You start loving a memory of who they once were — a concept born from your own subjective mind. They say most of our cells are replaced periodically, so you are never quite the same person you were a few years ago or even yesterday for that matter. But the causal link between the me from then and the me now serves as living proof that I am one enduring person. I think the same about love. I think love evolves and adapts, because it has to. People change, and that’s irrefutable. Likewise, love morphs and changes as we navigate life’s many hardships with our partners. Perhaps bits and pieces of that love get replaced every year, every month, every day. But that’s what makes love magical, because it endures. Despite everything, it endures. But for this to be true, you have to actively be in a relationship. Otherwise, whom or what are you really loving?
Baffling show from start to finish. I personally don’t understand it.
Iron Wok Jan Ep. 12
This show has run up against the limits of what it can and cannot do — or rather, what language can and cannot do (Wittgenstein must be pleased). The judges try to describe how those eggs fashioned out of pigeon blood could possibly be tasty, but they can’t quite put forth a convincing argument. The cream mellowed out the flavor, and it’s unlike any blood dish he’s ever had before, but it still “has a vivid blood flavor stronger than all of them.” What the fuck are you talking about, dude?
We still have the girls’ dishes to judge, and Kiriko’s contribution is predictably appealing. The judges even agree that it’s tasty. They come down hard on her, however, for lacking originality. She didn’t push the envelope. Even if creativity isn’t one of the stated criteria, people are always going to reward someone for taking risks. I guess Kiriko should’ve considered that. Still, should creativity matter that much? I think she scored quite low despite her dessert being thoroughly enjoyable for everyone.
But here’s where the show really loses me: when the judges try Yang’s dessert — y’know, the one made with the fallopian tubes of frogs — their primary criticism is that exotic ingredients are pretentious. They might appeal to foodies but not the majority of her diners. You fuckers just ate eggs made out of blood! Some of those eggs were dusted in ground pearls! Another egg was wrapped in congealed bird spit! I don’t want to hear this bullshit about palatable ingredients!
In the end, Otani — the one who organized this whole tournament in an attempt to humiliate Jan — loses his temper and literally starts beating on the kid. He pretty much just destroyed his credibility and reputation (and should be arrested). Nevertheless, he is still a judge. When the scores are tallied, factoring in both rounds, Jan and Kiriko are ultimately tied on the scoreboard. Yup, just like I expected. But Otani hasn’t submitted his score. As a result, he tips the scales toward Kiriko at the last second, making her the official winner… but again, with the creep disgracing himself, it’s a hollow victory at best. Kiriko certainly isn’t happy about it. Worst of all, the public is now trying to hunt random pigeons for their blood.
Final thoughts? Man, I wish the cast was likable. Jan is such an unappealing protagonist, and Kiriko never really emerged as her own character. She mostly stood in opposition to Jan and little else. All the other characters might as well be non-factors. I still enjoyed watching the show, but how much of that can be attributed to simply having fun talking about the culinary arts, and how much of that is due to the show itself? Still, I’d welcome a second season. I’d still rather take this over yet another generic fantasy harem anime. Just try to give the girls some of the spotlight next time?
The Insipid Prince’s Furtive Grab for the Throne Ep. 12
I’ll never really understand why a show mostly about politics feels the need to dabble into action. If you can pull it off, sure, knock yourself out. But watching Elna cut the sea dragon in half just feels perfunctory. The sea dragon is pissed that it was forced to slumber for so long, but we never go any deeper than that. After all, this is just a diversion, but it’s a diversion that takes up so much time. As a result, there’s barely anything left in the episode to talk about! To make a short story even shorter, the brothers are highly successful on their trip. They impress their father, but piss off their color-coded siblings even more than ever. Arnold almost carelessly reveals his secret identity as Silver to Elna, but she’s too clueless to connect the dots. Leonard tells Arnold that he hopes they can continue working together. Well, naturally. Arnold is pretty much doing 99% of the heavy lifting. Last but not least, Arnold and Finne stop just short of confessing their feelings. After last week’s intimacy, this feels like a step backward. Sadly, the most I can say about this show is that it’s surprisingly not terrible. It’s far from good, though.
LIAR GAME Ep. 25
I only got five hours of sleep when I watched this episode, so all the rules-explainin’ was really getting to me. Like I thought, Akiyama was tracking every card in the deck. Even so, he still has to explain how he did it. Then it’s time for the next round, which requires Nao to play the woman on the opposing team in a game of stationary roulette? Never heard of it. Naturally, the anime has to explain how the game works to the audience, which includes a practice round. Once we’re done with that, Akiyama then explains to Nao how he thinks she can win. As you can imagine, I was really starting to nod off by the end of these PowerPoint presentations. The actual round itself doesn’t begin until nearly eighteen minutes into the episode. I really need to take a nap after this.
Right off the bat, Nao tries to persuade the other woman to let her team win. This way, Nao can use the winnings to save them. But of course, the other woman — and by extension, the rest of her team — can’t trust Nao’s promises. In fact, she seems to realize that Nao is a bad liar, so she uses probing questions to determine where the ball is. To compound matters, the anime cuts to Fukunaga, who thinks to themselves that everything is going as they planned. Dun dun du–… nah, this is a red herring. I don’t believe for a second that Fukunaga would stick with these two for this long just to betray them in the last two episodes. My guess is that Fukunaga knows Nao can’t win on her own, a fact which Akiyama also agrees with. I’m just not sure how telling the other woman about Nao’s facial tell is going to help them win the round. Hmmm… bah, it’s just Liar Game. I don’t care if I solve the mystery or not.
Young Ladies Don’t Play Fighting Games Ep. 12
Yeah, disappointing is how I’d describe this ending. As you might’ve guessed, Mio eventually loses to Arisa. Sure, it was close. And sure, you could argue that the real victory was convincing the little brat to A) respect Mio as an opponent and B) learn to find fun into competition again. But that assumes I care about Arisa, which I don’t. So this resolution means nothing to me. Problem is, it also feels like we didn’t get a proper resolution anywhere else either.
So what was up with Tamaki and her sister? I guess she almost quit, but Mio’s match inspired her to keep trying. Uh, great. What exactly is Yuu’s contribution to this series? The conclusion to her “arc” is seemingly that she needs to put in more effort. Okay…? Last but not least, Aya could at least tie a bow on this first season by being brave and opening up about her feelings. I’m not just talking about her blatant crush on Mio, but also her insecurities about how she thinks she isn’t a good enough rival. But no, they just keep gaming. Aya’s argument is that actions speak louder than words, which is true usually. But when we’re talking about dense anime protagonists, I think your actions can’t be this subtle, either.
Like I said, I don’t find this finale satisfying. Granted, I don’t think I ever bought into the show in the first place, so you could argue that I’m biased from the start. That’s fine. I just think this was a pretty mediocre show from start to finish. It only got a buff thanks to its CGDCT veneer. It then got another buff by having a double pinch of yuri (CGDCT already has a pinch of yuri by default). Take those elements away, and I think the whole experience is pretty empty.
Red River Ep. 12
Mittizawa is now smitten with Yuri, so he steals a kiss from the girl right in front of Kail. When that doesn’t seem to win the girl over — gosh, I wonder why? — he tries to steal her heart via mind control. This whole time, Kail and his army are laying siege to Mittizawa’s city, starving it out little by little. I don’t think the Prince of Darkness gives a shit, though. No wonder the soldiers eventually revolt; they even kill his father offscreen. Eventually, one of Mittizawa’s consorts takes a blow to protect him, so Yuri convinces the guy to just fuck off already. Somehow, he agrees. Love it. This show’s emotional payoffs are so weak.
But what happens next probably gives me the biggest laugh all season. As Yuri is wandering through the burning streets of Carchemish, looking to find a way out, someone grabs her and drags her into a shadowy alleyway! Aaaaaaaand it’s just Kail. Even so, I think this technically counts as a kidnapping of sorts, because he could’ve just called out to her. No, he had to yoink her like some sort of evildoer. I’ve lost count of the number of times this girl has been taken against her will. She even gets kidnapped by her own love interest!
Afterwards, the show makes a big deal about how Yuri will finally get to return home. Unfortunately, Kail’s men want their precious Ishtar to stick around, so they leak information to the evil queen’s men. As a result, the bridge back to the kingdom has been burned down. Welp, guess Yuri will have to stick around a little longer. A year, to be exact. She collapses to the ground and cries, but I don’t buy it. She desperately wanted to go home in the first few episodes, but ever since she fell in love with Kail, that sense of urgency more or less disappeared. For Yuri to now suddenly wail over her misfortune, it just doesn’t strike me as credible.
Nevertheless, this sets us up for the next “emotional” arc. Kail has to decide whether or not he wants to keep growing closer to Yuri, knowing that her attachment to him might prevent her from going home. She also has to decide if she wants to avoid him or not over the next year. But like I said, this feels hollow, because I know she doesn’t really want to go home. Her heart’s not in it, and that’s insane to me. To choose a guy you just met — while being stuck in the distant past, no less! — over your own loving family is wild.
Oh yeah, there’s some stinger at the end about King Tut dying, so his wife is going to have to find a new husband. Shrug, I don’t know what to say about it.
Both this show and Jaadugar are both historical dramas in a sense, but they’re so wildly different in tone and execution. Red River is like a poorly executed soap opera. It just wants to be a trashy romance where all these hot princes literally murder people over Yuri. I dread the upcoming second cour.
Clevatess S2 Ep. 11
We have two battles occurring at the same time, but we really only get to see one of them. And technically, Alicia’s fight isn’t even physical. Rather, she’s fighting for her soul. First, let’s get Klen vs Vordin out of the way, because we won’t really get to see how it plays out until the finale. So for now, all we get is Klen attempting to harness his full powers by turning dangerously cheesy. When he asks, “If you want to destroy [Toah], why try to revive the hero legend?” To which Vordin simply replies, “That, too, is something that does not concern you.” The anime insists on blue-balling us to the very end.
So we’re back with Alicia, who has to fight a shade of her father in her undies. Poor girl. She gets knocked to the ground at one point, but rather than finishing her, the shade of her father picks her up and even gives her a piggyback ride home. Yeah, it’s all an illusion, but Alicia gets to pretend that her family is whole again. We even get to see what her mother looked like. To hammer home the fact that this is all fake, Alicia also gets her left eye back. Sure, she’s freezing to death in reality, but you can’t beat 20/20 vision!
So what’s the trick to beating this trial? Ultimately, Alicia has to confront her past and remember why she wanted to become a hero so badly. It simply boils down to her mother’s final words. Y’see, her mother got caught in a landslide, but like always, she had just enough strength to say her goodbyes. Alicia is determined to become a hero, because her mother encouraged her to pursue her dreams. As soon as she unearths this painful memory, the scar over her left eye comes back. She has accepted both the good and bad parts of her life. And just like that, the illusion is literally shattered.
I dunno, I don’t think any of this is all that impactful, because unsurprisingly, a goody-two-shoes like Alicia doesn’t truly have a bad side. Some people have real guilt, because they’re fucked up people. It’s inspiring to see them nevertheless pick up the pieces and forge on. It’s encouraging to see that the lowest among us can still improve themselves. Alicia’s a good person, and there’s nothing wrong with that. But it’s not like she’s climbing a mountain. Accepting her bad is like a breezy jaunt up a small hill. All she did was suppress her mother’s death. Sure, that isn’t the healthiest way to deal with a traumatic event, but in the grand scheme of things… I’m sorry, but it’s just not that bad. I’m not saying it doesn’t suck to lose a parent. I probably sound like a real jerk right about now, but if the key to defeating her “demons” and thus escaping the illusion is simply remembering that her mother died, then dude, get on with it already. It could’ve been a lot worse. I mean, Milea literally has an evil split personality. I think her accepting her bad is a little trickier.
My Stepmother and Stepsisters Aren’t Wicked Ep. 11
This week, Miyu meets a girl who always tries to break up a fight when she sees one. The only problem, however, is that she’s too gungho about it. Sometimes, people aren’t really fighting. It’s just banter. Other times, a small fight can be a good thing. It lets people get grievances off their chest. You can’t work things out if you keep everything bottled up all the time. So Miyu holds the new girl back near the end of the episode to allow a fight to play itself out. The new girl then learns an invaluable lesson… like they always do. Everything always works out in this show. I wonder why… is it because there are no men around? That’s probably it, huh?
To be honest, I think the story would be more interesting if her father showed up and explained himself, but I don’t think that’s gonna happen.
Mebius Dust Ep. 11
This continues to be an utterly terrible show. Just completely unengaging from start to finish. Araki wants to patch things up with Stella, which she initially refuses. But after talking it out with her BFF, she decides that she needs to hear him out at least once. But of course, we’ll have to push this off, because Kurusu is crashing out. There are now pink blobs covering the entire city, but they don’t seem to do anything…? They cling to stuff, and sometimes people, but… what harm are they doing? I think they’re supposed to be dangerous, but the show can’t even manage to convey a sense of real danger. Nevertheless, Kurusu wants to lash out even more, so he uses more dust. This time, the blobs turn into spiky crystals, which sometimes trap people inside their cars and buildings or weigh them down. Okay, I guess… I guess that’s bad. Look, I get that this is supposed to be bad, but the story is doing such a bad job at driving that point home. Like holy moly, can you show some real destruction or something? The dumbest part to me was when two of the kids give each other the look — Yo, let’s team up to crush this shit! — high five, then dramatically leap into the air to do a dual attack… just to hit a crystal on some parked van. What the fuck was that? What was all that for! I thought they were gonna clear out all of the crystals in a small area or something. Or at least save someone in actual need. But a truck? A fucking truck? Kurusu decides to ramp things up even more, so he’s going to directly draw from the mother crystal floating in the sky. But if he does this — if he uses up all the dust — the habitable area will shrink, and anyone with special powers like the kids will die. But then he and Araki can survive outside the city limits? Oh right, right, they just have special… something or other (crystals?) that somehow prevents anything bad from happening to them. Do we know why they have those crystals? Shrug. Do I know what the researcher guy (kid?) is researching? Shrug. Why is Kurusu so attached to Araki anyway? Shrug. The kids ultimately team up to try and stop Kurusu from, y’know, killing them. Somehow, Araki doesn’t quite approve of this plan. God forbid we try to survive, Araki. Needless to say, they all fail to reach Kurusu high up in the sky. This is when Araki finally informs someone that he’ll go talk to the weirdo kid. He’ll hear Kurusu out. Just like that, the others are like, “Wow, dude, you’ve really changed!” Huh?! But Araki can’t fly, so he needs help to get up there. That’s when Stella finally comes back into the story — where the hell has she been? — and tells Araki that she’s willing to help him if she finally tells her why he made her believe she was his sister. This show has the same weak-ass storytelling flaw as a lot of anime series in which it doesn’t really have anything interesting to say. At most, it has one or two major revelations, so it has to defend and hide those revelations at all costs. Never play those cards until the last fucking episode of the season. The thing is, when a show like Clevatess pulls the same uninspired trick, it would at least give us some flashy action to distract us. Mebius Dust has nothing. I’m so annoyed with this show, I’m not even going to use paragraphs for this chunk of text. I’m not going to make it readable. Don’t watch this show. Don’t even waste your short, valuable life reading about it. Just move on. I want you to see this unseemly blob of words and recoil. That’s how you should feel about Mebius Dust.
Chainsmoker Cat Ep. 11
I felt like this was one of the show’s more subdued episodes. Sure, you still get a poop joke, but wild animals gotta do their business. Can’t stop that. The best gag was probably Imoko’s mother staging yet another fake home invasion. No words necessary. Hell, the whole scene lasts four or five seconds at most. You needed to remember her pulling the same stunt episodes ago to connect the dots. This actually made me laugh.
Dara-san of Reiwa Ep. 12
As usual, Jurota made preparations with Nagi’s aid to protect the mountain in the past timeline. As usual, the kids goof off with Dara in the present timeline. I feel like I can disregard 99% of the episode thanks to the cliffhanger. I mean, it’s just way too important compared to all the slice-of-life bits. As soon as Dara recalls her actual name, her sister suddenly erupts from her. I guess a fragment of her was living inside the snake lady amalgamation all along. They’re like three entities in one. So what now? Time seems to have done nothing to blunt the elder sister’s nastiness, but I’d like to be wrong. Technically, the snake thing hasn’t magically become benevolent either. It’s just too weak to do any real harm to Amane and her friends. Dara and the kids can maybe vanquish her elder sister for good, but they could instead sap her of her powers completely, thereby neutering her. But I have no clue how they might do that. Maybe that sort of thing isn’t even possible, because she is attached to Dara. I dunno, guess we’ll just have to wait and see. I just think it’s a little weird that a show like this still feels the need to have a “final boss” of sorts.
I Became a Legend After My 10 Year-Long Last Stand Ep. 12
This is one of those shows that likes to employ pointless cliffhangers, because as soon as the episode starts, Luck gets back on his feet no worse for wear (nevermind the gaping hole in his chest). What follows is pretty funny to me: let’s just do it all over again! Eric fighting off vampires to protect Philly’s parents? Check. Goran, his daughter, and Sia fighting off vampires outside? Check. Lefy praying to whatever god she believes in to protect the city? Check. There’s nothing new. It’s the same struggle repeated for the final episode.
Luckily, this can’t go on forever, so Luck does eventually have to defeat the encroaching dark god once and for all. As a result, he seemingly comes up with a new spell on the spot. It allows him to compress the dark god into something a little more manageable. I guess his new spell is kinda like a black hole. And just like that, our heroes have saved the day.
The aftermath tries to tease the possibility of a sequel. Oooh, the man who recommended the vampire butler to Philly’s family has already been silenced! Someone out there must be pulling the strings! But then Eric says how there’s going to be a war between humans and vampires, and just like that, any modicum of excitement I might have for the future is instantly dashed. Bro, the vampires sucked. There was literally nothing interesting about them, and you wanna rehash that conflict again? But that’s what this show is, no? Luck literally reverted back in physical age — you’ll see why I made that distinction — just so he can become an F-rank adventurer again.
In the end, Philly’s punishment for inadvertently summoning the dark gods — man, girls just can’t have any fun anymore! — is “house arrest,” i.e., moving in with Luck and the rest of the kiddos. She’s supposed to serve as Luck’s assistant. But the thing is, she’s a bit older than them (but still a child in my eyes). It’s obvious that the sagacious King Eric is trying to play matchmaker. I’ll give the show credit for one thing: it could’ve built a harem for Luck like a lot of generic fantasy anime, but it resisted the urge. Girls like Celliss and Sia greatly respect Luck for who he is, but there isn’t even a whiff of anything romantic between them. The only thing is, Luck might look young, but he’s still technically an old man. Sorry, Eric, but I don’t ship it.
The Drops of God Ep. 24
The two brothers are both in a marathon, because the grand prize might be the Eighth Apostle itself. There are, however, plenty of pit stops along the way, and at each place, you get to sip and enjoy wine. Now, I am certainly not a doctor, but like a lot of ideas on this show, I think this one is potentially dangerous. After all, alcohol is a diuretic, so I hope the boys had plenty to drink between those pit stops. Maybe I’m overreacting. After all, people might, I dunno, knock back a few beers while playing beach volleyball. Even so, I think a marathon is a little more taxing than a casual game of beach volleyball. Also, wine generally has a higher alcohol content than the average beer you might enjoy on the beach. All I’m saying is that I wouldn’t personally do it. Since alcohol can give you an elevated heartbeat, it’s gotta be hella uncomfortable to run on top of that.
Despite Miyabi making a big deal about chasing after Shizuku, she’s barely even in this episode. All she gets to do is stand on the sidelines along with the rest of the ladies. During the judging, Shizuku does acknowledge her… somewhat. He says he wanted to hurry back not for the contest itself, but to enjoy the wine with her. But then he quickly adds the “and everyone else” when expressing his gratitude. That’s the best you’re gonna get out of a guy like this. It’s the sort of boyish energy you typically find in shounen anime.
Anyway, I think both of the brothers got the eighth apostle wrong, but Shizuku is slightly closer due to his description? Or maybe Issei let him win, because he’s warming up to their sibling rivalry? I dunno, I don’t really care. I just think it’s odd to end here with still four rounds to go, five if you include the Drops of God.