Finale Marathon

Every season, countless anime come and go, never to be remembered again in the annals of two dimensional schoolgirls. Don’t you ever wonder what happens at the end of a bad anime? Let’s take a moment and see these shows off before they head to anime purgatory. Let’s be thankful for what they’ve given us.

Miracle Train

For all you men out there watching this show, you can sleep a little better now; you’re not a pedophile for lusting after Akari-chan.

I know this might be hard to believe…

…so let’s take this step by step.

ONE! Get on the Oedo Line!

TWO! Be stereotypically female!

THREE! Wake up a child.

It’s as easy as A-B-C. So ladies, the next time you faint on a train and wake up to a masked man…

…relax. You’re just trapped for eternity. First, though, put on this pink little number… The tuxedo mask dude is actually kinda scary. There’s no running away.

Only submission. So how do we save poor old Akari-chan and get her back to her normal life? Apparently squeeze watches as hard as you can:

At the end, the anime poses a deep and thought-provoking question to its audience (of God knows who):

. . .

Sora no Otoshimono

I’m dying to know what happens at the end of the flying panties anime.

Haha, someone is actually called Nymph-san. I didn’t watch this, okay? It’s news to me. Just gimme a sec to get this straight… Nymph-san is a loli who just wants to make her master happy:

But apparently, she’s being lied to. They just want to collect the big one’s Uranus. Yeah, I just typed that sequence of words out. Don’t give me that look.

I dunno what’s so surprising about her being the queen of Uranus. Jeez, get your mind out of gutter, guys.

Final battle time.

Just another day in anime.

Shin Koihime Musou

Koihime Musō: Doki Otome Darake no Sangokushi Engi (恋姫†無双 ~ドキッ☆乙女だらけの三国志演義~?) is… based on the classic Chinese novel Romance of the Three Kingdoms.

The [anime] is set in ancient China….

…during and after the fall of the Han dynasty….

As the empire finally collapse and warlords wage war with each other, amidst the turmoil several major factions are formed, ready to rule and unite the fractured nation.

Just another day in anime.

I also marathon’d the finales for Trapeze and Seitokai no Ichizon, but I just found them unremarkable. Now the waiting game begins for the winter season.

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3 Replies to “Finale Marathon”

  1. I believe the animu Shin Koihime Musou and Sora no Otoshimono had it best for the whole Japanese animu industry in general: “Fappable females (and the guys who get beaten up by them).

    I’m getting too old for this crap. I remember when anime used to be cool and watchable; shows where the guys and girls work together to solve problems and all. (Just like in adult anime, currently.)

    Title’s like El Hazard Wanderers, E’s Otherwise and Chrono Crusade, Grenadier, Tomino’s / UC Gundam series…

    Now everything is all cliched, redundant, uncreative, and messed up. :(

    1. I saw a report somewhere that anime studios in general get very little money. Nevermind the big dogs like Kyoani, most studios are scraping by. Hell, didn’t Gonzo nearly fold? I think this affects the kind of shows we get.

      1. GONZO nearly fold. It animated some episodes for “Date-sim playing loser in a mostly-female student council” (Seitokai no Ichizon). And it gave animation production of Strike Witches II to AIC.

        It’s obvious how it works: The ship goes down, you panic, and you go for the sure thing that makes you more money. I see it as a continuing downward spiral; the loudest Larsen of the “Larsen Effect.”

        And it’s sad considering that they had some really good ideas. All of them done wrong for the sake of noise-making, unfortunately. :(

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