Another bloody anime poll but with extra Marmite!

Let’s try this again. Honestly, I do want to write about older anime, buuuuut… taking a serious approach obviously didn’t work for an anime like Outlaw Star. So here’s another idea: why not return to my roots? This blog was founded on the principles of being as bitchy as possible about anime. Over the past three years though, I’ve… eh, changed somewhat. But y’know, why can’t I recapture those good ol’ days when I used to watch utter dreck like Kampfer or The Sacred Blacksmith? Even better, why don’t I do that with older shows!

So here’s our four candidates… but wait, don’t let me tell you what to vote for. Instead, why don’t we let your fellow anime fans convince you instead? I’ll post excerpts from both positive and negative reviews to help you decide!

Maria-sama ga Miteru

The defense: “As a rare duck around here, a soon to be 50 year old male… I found Maria-sama ga Miteru to have been absolutely charming and delightful, and easily the best series I’ve watched in all of 2008. … MariMite is just the sort of show that anime fans of any and every stripe can enjoy.”

Gotta respect those elders.

The prosecution: “Marimite is the type of yuri I like to watch(not to masturbate to, for that I like… well…uh… nevermind): No perversion, no groping, no male delusions(common lesbian porn gets it ALL WRONG). Just girls who love each other.

But somehow… I did not like it. Not. One. Bit.

Why is this?

The biggest problem is… how much like men the girls looked.”

Then again, our friend here has such an airtight argument! How can I enjoy a yuri anime full of characters that look like men? What do you say, guys? Will you vote for MarMite or will you vote for the next show?

F-F-Fruuuuit Basket

The defense: At first glance the plot may seem ridiculous, but when you start watching it you realize it goes a lot deeper than that. Does Fruits Basket have its hilarious comedy scenes? Yes. But it also has its intense, dramatic moments that will leave you in tears. It is a Dramody, through in through – however it’s more drama and comedy, focusing on the characters’ past and how the curse has effected their future and their life.

Did I cry in Fruits Basket? Yes.”

Don’t worry ’cause I already have a box of Kleenex ready.

The prosecution: “I’ll sum up this contrived and utterly unentertaining anime quickly. This show is for
12 year old girls who enjoy drawing pictures of fierce cats on their binders named cuddles. “

Straight to the point. Moving on…

Love Hina

The defense: “love hina is funny,ecchi and full of girls!
it was funny to see how clumsy keitaro is and his bad luck is really funny.
but the turtles were weird.”

B-but I like turtles.

The prosecution: “He was less of a convincing love interest, and more like a beaten housewife. No, the fact that the series treated Naru kicking and punching Keitaro as ‘hilarious’ did not convince me at all. And likewise for Naru’s feelings for Keitaro. Her behavior for most of the series frequently crossed the line of funny boyfriend-girlfriend slapstick comedy to the disturbingly abusive. Why on earth would she love a spineless loser whom she thought was a lecherous pervert is really up to anyone’s guess. In other words, the couple of Naru and Keitaro had all the charm and plausibility of a used condom.”

You rate condoms by their plausibility? Anyway, last but not least…

Kimi ga Nozomu Eien

The defense: “Kimi ga Nozomu Eien is one of the anime that I know is not perfect, but I can’t find any category to deduct points on. Thus, I had to hurt the enjoyment score.”

Makes sense.

The prosecution: “Ok to describe this show just role play with me here for just a sec,

lets pretend your at a party and you see a very cute and sweet girl, very attractive and cute and she totally is into you, sparks fly as you talk and one thing leads to another and your heading back to her apartment getting ready to do the naughty bit, but then you sober up and it turns out this girl is not a girl but instead a fat middle aged man that goes by the name of bub, you try to escape but bub pins you down and forces himself inside you, you try to resist but fail as he enters your eardrum, he then progressively screws you in the ear and as his massive manhood is poking at your brain you start to lose your motor skills and abeewity tah taipe,

after you wake from a coma somehow find out your pregnant despite the fact your a man, and you relise that the place you were was not a apartment but instead a half finished bridge at the construction yard, as you wander out you are run over by 15 cars simultaneously, as you lie there dieing your old friend bub pays a visit to your flattened body for one last session

that is how i felt while watching this show”

I don’t think this needs any further comment.

So there you have it. Four wonderful shows to watch. Which will it be, guys? Whichever show it ends up being, no seriousness from me this time. I’ll close the poll in about a week.

39 thoughts on “Another bloody anime poll but with extra Marmite!

    1. E Minor Post author

      Best review I could find on MAL. People don’t rant on that thing much. Or maybe they just didn’t rant about shows like Love Hina.

    1. E Minor Post author

      But MarMiteMarMite! Actually, the last one might be the best choice since it’s not all that long of a series.

  1. The Fin

    I’ve repressed most of my memories of MarMite, but what I do recall is horrifying. No lie, about the worst anime I’ve ever watched, and EM has made me watch some bad stuff. Which of course means it has my vote!

  2. KizukuKanshi

    By prosecution alone there is a clear winner. Oddly enough, I hadn’t even heard of that one. Nozomu Eien vote from me.

    1. E Minor Post author

      Oddly enough, I hadn’t even heard of that one. Nozomu Eien vote from me.

      Really? I found it on a list of overrated anime.

  3. soaringwings

    Going to vote for Fruits Basket because it’s the only one I know and I’d love to see some sarcastic reviewing on it. As I’m part of the minority of people who actually like shoujo but doesn’t like Fruits Basket.

      1. soaringwings

        No, maybe I worded wrong, but I’m in the minority that likes shoujo and hates Fruits Basket. In my experience, most people who like Fruits Basket also like shoujo in general, but there are a few of us that like the demographic/genre but don’t like Fruits Basket. That’s all I meant. :)

  4. JW

    Haha. Were all those reviews from MAL? On one hand, I’m interested in your take on Fruits Basket, but that Nozumu Eien hate just makes you sit-up.

  5. Tapioca

    damn shame I only recall disgust from even hearing of those titles again. No kind words for fruits basket’s anime adaption, it strays from the original story like a lost drunken bum placed in a foreign country. The manga was beyond excellent, but I’ll root for Kimi ga, its the real killer [prepare to o.d on some major, highly suffocating angst]

    1. E Minor Post author

      prepare to o.d on some major, highly suffocating angst

      At least it’s only fourteen episodes long.

    1. E Minor Post author

      Man, I haven’t been to Newgrounds since high school. Is it still full of poorly animated cartoons?

  6. Ryan R

    Nice, I’ve seen all four of these shows, and one of them just recently.

    Of the four, I’m honestly the most curious to get your take on Kimi ga Nozomu Eien, since it’s the one I’m the least confident about what you’d think of it.

  7. Bern

    Haven’t contemplated watching any of these shows before.

    The review on Kimi ga Nozomu Eien makes me want to pick it…

    but on second thought, I’d rather read E Minor write extensively about man-girl yuri.

    >Vote Maria-sama ga Miteru

  8. Justin

    I would be interested in seeing you blog about Kiminozu, which I watched an episode of then promised I would watch it again. You can guess I didn’t keep my promise.


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