Ao Haru Ride Ep. 9: These characters, man…

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Every new episode is somehow more frustrating than the previous one. But even though only a handful of people even read my posts on Ao Haru Ride, the show must go on.

— Futaba is staring at Kou so hard, it’s kind of cringeworthy. Wait, no, this is more cringeworthy: “He’s laughing like he’s having fun. But maybe he doesn’t really care about school or his friends?” Like you can’t hang out with people and have fun unless you care about them. Like school is something you have to care about. Like you can really take the guy’s words at face value. Seriously though, if someone said to me “Caring for things brings a lot of trouble,” I’d just roll my eyes and tell the person to stop being some a dramatic, little b-… bunny. Yeah. But Futaba is actually sitting here, debating whether or not Kou cares about anything. Oh and what a shocker it would be if he doesn’t even care about… *whispers* …school!

— Later, the rest of the girls gather and gossip about Kou. Yes, they’re gossiping. I like how Futaba’s wonders whether or not Kou truly likes his friends, but here she is, airing his dirty laundry to the rest of the group. What the hell, man? If she cares about him, then fine, pull up your big girl panties and talk to the guy. Otherwise, I think it’s pretty fucking low to blabber about his private life to others, even if they’re your two best friends.

— I don’t think Kou’s a stand-up guy or anything, but I think these girls are pretty fucking nuts. The thing is, Kou is obviously fucked-up and needs therapy. He needs an actual guardian and not the weak, ineffectual Tanaka who does nothing but look sad. Like seriously, way to step up, big bro. But my point is, no matter how much help Kou needs, everyone deserves a measure of privacy. And it’s pretty sad that these girls are all judging him when they know nothing about him or his situation. Yeah, even Futaba knows nothing about Kou. After nine episodes, she doesn’t have a clue what he’s been through at home. Their behavior at the start of this week’s episode is disgusting.

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— Hah, thanks to Futaba’s big mouth, even Yuri wonders if the oh-so-wonderful time they spent with Kou at the leadership retreat was a lie. Then Futaba tries to pull it back: “I’m sure that Kou has his own reasons for saying something so sad.” Oh, you think so? You think maybe we shouldn’t reveal what was said between two people in a private conversation to others because they might not have the proper context nor information to properly assess the situation?

— Futaba then suggests, “We just have to get so involved in his life that he won’t say things like that anymore.” Ugh.

— Hearing this, Yuri replies, “I feel like, Futaba-chan… you’ve become really pretty lately.” What the fuck is wrong with you girls? I feel like my brain is melting as I try to watch this stupid fucking show. I just can’t grasp these characters’ bizarre thought processes.

— So Futaba’s all worried and shit that Kou isn’t studying hard enough, right? So what does she do? Distract the guy in class, thereby getting him in trouble with the teacher.

— Does Futaba then take some responsibility for the situation? Kou’s primarily at fault for insulting the teacher, but the girl isn’t guiltless. Well, the answer is no; Futaba takes no responsibility for anything.

— Oh lord, Yuri’s like a sad puppy: “This? This is the CD I borrowed from Mabuchi-kun earlier!” Yes, yes, we saw this in last week’s episode. What? Is that what you’re going to do all series long now? Drag that damn CD around with you wherever you go, even when it’s lunchtime?

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— Ahahaha, Kou then walks up to Futaba and wipes off the lipstick from her bottom lip. What a fucking asshole. So what if he doesn’t like it? It’s not his body; he doesn’t have a claim on whatever she puts on her face. Even if they were fucking married, he isn’t allowed to do this. But if you’re a hot bishie in a generic shoujo anime, you totally can!

— But in the distance, Yuri’s watching the whole thing and looking sad. She’s sad because what? He doesn’t treat her like shit the way he treats Futaba like shit? “U-uguu, I wish he would also lay claim on my face like he owns me…” The implication here is that even though Futaba is pretending to be mad at Kou, it’s a good thing that he did what he did. Because it shows that he cares, girls! Otherwise, why would Yuri look so sad?

— What the hell is wrong with this guy’s face?

— It turns out Kou used to be in the advanced classes. Yeah, this hot bishie is also totally smart too. He just doesn’t apply himself, mm-hmm.

— Naturally, these two new guys are taunting Kou for dropping out of the advanced classes. The rule applies with guys too, but to a lesser extent: if you’re not friends with the main characters, then you’ll be portrayed as an asshole. There’s no in-between. Applying that logic to real life, there were 2,000 other assholes at my high school. Damn, no wonder high school sucked!

— The anime then cuts to Yuri, who’s sitting all by herself with… with?! You guessed it! That fucking CD! But oh my god, Mabuchi-kun lent it to me!!!

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— Yuri’s sad though, because it looks like she’s already given up on this little contest between her and Futaba. How pathetic. Giving up before you’ve even done anything. Really, she hasn’t done anything besides borrow one of his CDs. This is the 21st century, girls. It’s okay to pursue guys. You’re not a whore if you’re interested in boys. And if people call you a whore for it, fuck’em. Life’s too short to worry about haters. But somehow, I get the feeling that girls like Yuri only want to passively sit there and look cute, expecting guys to do all the courtship.

— But seriously, the more I watch this bullshit, the more it pisses me off. These characters are so goddamn vapid. I find it laughable that Kou was even in the advanced classes.

— Tanaka-sensei has decided to take a seat next to Yuri. The girl then asks about Kou’s bad grades, and I’m actually surprised that Tanaka replied with “That’s private information, okay?” Seriously, I’m actually surprised. The characters in this anime have been so dumb, I expected Kou’s own brother to talk shit about him too. But whoops, that’s right, some of us are actually adults and we don’t talk about people’s private problems to others.

— That doesn’t mean Tanaka won’t share a childhood memory of Kou to the world, though!

— Later that night, Yuri texts Futaba, wondering if the two of them can help Kou with his studies. Jokes on them: he’s actually in the advanced classes so he’s probably smarter than our two shoujos. He just gets bad grades ’cause he doesn’t care. No amount of study dates will fix that. Still, they meet with Aya the next day to rope him into this mess too.

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— Early Saturday morning, Kou wakes up to find that his friends have invited themselves over to his home. His front door was literally unlocked, too. I know Japan has a low crime rate and shit, but I’d never be comfortable leaving my doors unlocked. And it’s hilarious how Futaba bothers to ask Aya if he’s free, but no one — no one — bothered to ask Kou if he even wanted this fucking study date. It’s basically an intervention, then.

— But first things first, Yuri drags out that fucking CD: “The CD you lent me. Thank you.” Oh man, I can’t stop laughing. There has been a total of one scene in this entire episode where Yuri didn’t have the CD on her. One. Every other scene, she’s had it on her. Ahhhhhhhhhhh.

— Futaba: “We’re all going to teach you about the subject we know best!” Butting into people’s lives? Hypocrisy? How to be judgmental? Speaking of which, what is Shuko doing here? Doesn’t she think of Kou as nothing more than a brat? Oh right, she wants to him to repent to Tanaka. Literally, that’s what she says: “Then you’ll repent to Tanaka-sensei.” Anime characters are either too nice or too gutless. I would’ve thrown them all out. But then again, I’d never be Kou either so here we are.

— Yuri: “Mabuchi-kun only just woke up. Maybe we’re too energetic for him?” Or maybe you pretty much staged an intervention on the guy, and he’s already got enough baggage to worry about. But oh-em-gee, we gotta ganbatte it up so he never feels sad with his friends!

— In reply to Yuri, Futaba goes, “Good point. Anyway, we’re going to get started.” I thought you were here to help the guy study. If he’s not studying, what’s even the point? What is there to get started on if the person you’re trying to help isn’t looking for help?

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— Kou inevitably joins the rest of the group in their studying… as if he wouldn’t. Futaba’s heart even goes all a-flutter simply because he asked her to teach him… stuff.

— Afterwards, Kou goes to get some glasses for the rest of the group. Yuri tries to help him, but then… something happens when she accidentally knocks over a bag of potatoes. I say something happens, because the anime won’t tell us. Instead, Futaba comes down to check up on them only to find that Yuri looks hella guilty. Whatever. I don’t really care. I’m also not rooting for any potential couple. They all kind of suck. I firmly believe you should have your major problems sorted out before you get into a relationship anyway.

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6 thoughts on “Ao Haru Ride Ep. 9: These characters, man…”

  1. “What the hell is wrong with this guy’s face?” This made me laugh before I even click on the pic! It’s just that you’re pointing out all of the problems with the show and it made me laugh that his face was one of them.

    His face really is weird tho…

    1. Well, everyone on the show is beautiful and/or handsome, so I just didn’t understand why they made that one kid so weird looking.

  2. God, that scene when Kou wipes Futaba’s lipstick made me rage so much when I read it in the manga. It let me wondering why I were such a masochist for still reading that shit. Seriously, I don’t know which part of that would make a girl happy. Things like that are so common… Having boyfriends in high school that tell you what to do and what to wear… Pitiful how this show makes things like that “cute” or “caring”. Fuck this, I hope those guys never end together. A relationship like that would suck so much.

    >But seriously, the more I watch this bullshit, the more it pisses me off.

    Yep. Your posts are overflowing with hate for this show. And I totally understand you.

    1. Things like that are so common… Having boyfriends in high school that tell you what to do and what to wear…

      It’s funny how if you point this out, you’ll often hear “Well, that’s just what their culture is like,” not even considering for once that perhaps other people are from East Asia as well, and still don’t think this sort of thing is okay.

  3. Good fuck, this show is so awful that even just reading your posts about it is becoming borderline unbearable. What a bunch of horrible characters… damn, I dodged a bullet big time dropping this thing like a hot potato.

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