Fall 2014 Harem Hill, Week 3: Just the highlights

Fall '14 Harem Hill Week 3

I lied. This is a post about harem anime, so there are no highlights. Anyway, time for another ridiculously long post. But as always, a look at the standings before we get started:

Ushinawareta Mirai no Motomete: 11 points
Grisaia no Kajitsu: 10 points
Madan no Ou to Vanadis: 4 points
Trinity Seven: 3 points
Daitoshokan no Hitsujikai: 2 points

As you can see, Ushinawareta Mirai no Motomete (40%) has taken the lead. Not only did it get the most votes from you guys, I also thought it had last week’s worst episode. As such, the show has been awarded six points towards the Crown of Shit Anime. Grisaia no Kajitsu (26%) barely beat out Trinity Seven (23%) for second place. Our library anime (14%) finished a distant fourth, and Madan no Ou to Vanadis could only muster up two whole votes. But it’s only week three of the early fall season, so Tigre and his well-endowed maidens aren’t out of the game just yet. Read on to see how bad things can get…


Daitoshokan no Hitsujikai Ep. 2

Daitoshokan no Hitsujikai - 0209

— Right out of the gates, a haremette treats us to some terrible singing. Like always, she has a troubled past. Don’t worry, our harem lead will fix you right up…

— …right after he picks up some trash around the school. As expected, Tsugumi’s Shiomi Happy Project is boring as hell. She essentially wants to help her classmates out with their problems. I’m pretty sure I’ve seen this storyline before. But because the group has no reputation, they need to first build it — preferably a good one, I’m sure. Apparently, the first step is to pick up trash. You’d think that a school with 50,000 students would have the staff on hand to take care of this. Sure, sure, we should pick up our own trash. You shouldn’t deliberately litter just because the janitor can pick it up. But at the same time, you also don’t want to drive them out of a job, y’know?

— But I mean, if you really want to solve this problem, you have to nip it in the bud. Picking up trash is just taking care of the immediate issue. Why are the students littering in the first place? But I digress…

— Tsugumi suddenly asks the harem lead if he’s ever picked up girls before. She thinks he would be good at it. Surprisingly, instead of blushing like an idiot, he asks if he’d be able to pick her up. Guess who ends up blushing like an idiot? Well, one of them has to turn beet red. You can’t have two characters perfectly capable of flirting with each other. This is anime, after all!

Daitoshokan no Hitsujikai - 0210

— Our dynamic duo finds their first victim in the annoyingly bubbly Kana. It’s such a sad state of affairs when a haremette is just plain happy that Kyotaro even remembers who she is. I hope she doesn’t faint if he smiles at her.

— Is that beauty in the form of a plastic bag dancing about in the wind? No, it’s beauty in that the bag leads you to a pantyshot. Surprise!

— The pantyshot belongs to the haremette we had seen at the start of the episode. Take notes, folks. We’re about to see how one goes about unlocking this girl’s h-scene. Of course, we won’t see said h-scene in the anime adaptation, but you can apply this invaluable knowledge to the visual novel itself. See? Who said watching harem anime all night wasn’t useful?

— Short, purple hair? Welp, it’s a Rei-clone. The sad thing is, these Rei-clones can’t just emulate the original Rei in personality. They even have to look like her.

— First things first, you gotta help the girl retrieve a coin from under the vending machine. Congrats! You’re now well on your way to doing Senri from behind!

Daitoshokan no Hitsujikai - 0211

— But after this fateful encounter, Kyotaro returns to his group of friends to discuss the mysterious Shepherd some more. Everyone’s apparently gotten an email from the mysterious entity. The problem with these scenes, of course, is that there’s an imbalance in our group of friends. Most of the girls are vapid; Tamamo’s the only one who doesn’t seem like an airhead. For a harem anime, I think batting .333 is pretty damn poor. This ain’t baseball.

— As they leave the school grounds, our group of friends comes across a tuning fork — the same tuning fork we had seen in Senri’s possession — and they are thus on their first quest to make this school a happier place. But we all know it’s all for that h-scene. But because the anime adaptation automatically plays itself out without any input from the viewers, we will not be rewarded.

— They try to return the tuning fork to the girl, but they only find Senri’s former childhood friend. It would appear that the two of them have had a falling out of some sort. Welp, time for our harem lead to mend a broken friendship without any ulterior motive.

— Even though they couldn’t locate Senri, our antsy Tsugumi just can’t leave things as they are. She has to return the tuning fork to Senri right now! This would be a more compelling story if, say, the tuning fork had been Senri’s inhaler or something. But a tuning fork? I think her untuned vocal cords can survive without it for a night.

Daitoshokan no Hitsujikai - 0204

— Once again, this is how we encounter Senri. I like how she’s supposed to be the school’s Song Princess, but her singing is hardly the focus of her portrayal. Instead, it’s all about how awesome her ass looks.

— When Tsugumi refers to Senri as the Song Princess, however, the latter gets oddly offended: “Did you bring it to me because I’m the Song Princess?” What? Does she really think they would’ve otherwise kept the tuning fork if she had been a normal girl? C’mon, who steals a tuning fork?

— So how does our charming harem lead diffuse the tense situation? By implying that he only returned the tuning fork to her because she had flashed her panties at him. Smooth.

— They then take the opportunity to pimp their club out to Senri, telling the Song Princess to contact them if she ever needs help. Yawn.

— Afterwards, Kyotaro comes across Kana on his way home, and helps her find a cellphone to buy. Oh boy, this is just the most exciting anime ever…

— The girl wants to buy the one cellphone you wouldn’t be able to fit in your own pocket. Smart. But that’s it. That’s the entire scene. Yep, that’s some great storytelling.

Daitoshokan no Hitsujikai - 0207

— The next day, as a symbol of his trust in the Tsugumi, Kyotaro hands her a key to the clubroom — the same clubroom he had wanted to keep to himself at the start of the same episode. Well, that was fast.

— With just two minutes left in the episode, Kana shows off her new cellphone to the rest of the group. On the bright side, at least the episode is almost over, ’cause it’s really starting to put me to sleep. C’mon, a cellphone-buying subplot? Are you serious?

— They even went and ruined the fat cat. It’s not even cute anymore! What does the anime have left if not the fat cat?!

— Our group of friends then get emails from the Shepherd telling them that Senri will teach them all something valuable. Great. So next week’s episode will still be Senri-focused. Ah well… until then.


Grisaia no Kajitsu Ep. 3

Grisaia no Kajitsu - 0307

— The harem lead returns from a jog to find one of his haremettes breaking into his room. It turns out, however, that Amane merely intends to surprise him in his sleep. Welcome back to the most boring hyped anime of the season.

— Well, we’re off to a great start. She then proceeds to rub herself on his bed. This entire time, Yuuji’s just watching from behind his doorframe. Oh, he can’t interrupt her! Not until she climaxes! Who knows how dangerous she might be? He might lose a finger or two!

— But see, I thought these girls were crazy. After three episodes, all I’ve been shown so far is a murderous girl. Sure, breaking into your room to masturbate on your bed is a bit kooky, I’ll admit, but not enough to make the show interesting. We’re not trying to be a porno here, now are we?

— Afterwards, the harem lead teaches Makina to sing, “Amane Suou is a bitch in heat!” Wow, misogyny!

Grisaia no Kajitsu - 0308

— Exciting developments follow, like how Sachi is taking her classmates’ drink orders. She then goes all the way out to Hokkaido to fetch the freshest, best milk possible. Sure she did. And in other news, Makina has been imitating the harem lead’s mannerisms. Scintillating.

— According to Yumiko, Amane was never like this, i.e. super flirty. She changed, however, when she got into a traffic accident. Uh-huh, I would certainly leave it up to a bunch of high schoolers to diagnose their classmates.

— Later, the harem lead overhears Michiru playing with a cat, but he thinks the girl is having sex. As a result, he wants to tell her off. Boy, did you see the look on his face when he realized it was just a cat?! Just more wackiness from Grisaia no Kajitsu! You can’t predict what will happen next! Seriously though, when is this shit going to get interesting?

— Now I’m watching Yuuji give the girl tips on how to drive cats away. Come. On.

— Then after that whole cat business is over…

Grisaia no Kajitsu - 0303

Man, this anime sucks. All it has is a bunch of sexually suggestive moments. All that bullshit about the girls being crazy? Well, that has amounted to no more than one whole minute out of three full episodes. Meanwhile, we’ve been inundated with nothing but boring pantyshots and Yuuji’s sad attempts to look alpha. The male lead is simply a jackass who takes every opportunity to insult the girls around him. I’m therefore not surprised that a lot of people seem to find him amusing. After all, he doesn’t get any goddamn flak for his shitty comments. Just sayin’, it’s really easy to look alpha when the girls are so oblivious that they wouldn’t dare stand up to you.

— Speaking of which, the girls don’t even act like real people with real problems. Even Yumiko is nothing but a boring caricature of a box-cutter-wielding maniac.

— What wacky situation has Yuuji gotten himself into this time? He had mistakenly agreed to have Sachi make him a shark-inspired pouch. Are you kidding me? Five girls and one guy at some shitty school. What do we do, guys? What do we do? I know! Let’s do a subplot where one of the girls makes him a pouch! Can you believe I’ve been getting hate comments for my coverage on this anime? Yo, if this banal shit rocks your world, cool. Whatever floats your boat, man. But don’t bring that nonsense here. It’s bad enough that I have to watch these shows. I don’t need to read hilariously bad comments in favor of the show as well.

Grisaia no Kajitsu - 0309

— And of course, some people always say they can enjoy this dreck because they don’t take it seriously. I, on the other hand, totally need to chill out!

— But the way I see it, if not taking anything seriously allows me to enjoy something as bad as Grisaia no Kajitsu, then we’ve jumped the fucking shark.

— So to get himself out of this mess, he tells her to make it so that his pouch is shaped like a bush dog. Hilarious! I know it is, because I’m so chilled out! I’m so goddamn chilled out that caring is now creepy!

— In the end, Michiru saves Yuuji from having to wear a rhinestone-covered pouch — oh, the horror! — by pawning it off on Makina. I’ve just wasted precious minutes of my life watching this brain-dead sequence of events.

— And yet, the scene is still going! Wow, the pouch barks, you guys! Let’s keep watching to see what other stupid noise the pouch can emit!

Grisaia no Kajitsu - 0310

— Finally, we change scenes, but the story has practically no flow to it. Somehow, we go from the previous scene to our characters now playing softball during P.E. Needless to say, one of the girls gets injured so our manly, alpha Yuuji has to carry her to the nurse’s office. I’m surprised this place even has a nurse. I bet it’s just one of the other characters moonlighting as one.

— Oh, even fucking better! The well-stocked nurse’s office is completely empty, so our harem lead attends to Amane’s ankle all by his lonesome.

— She then asks if he wants to be her boyfriend. After being summarily rejected, she settles with being his big sister. This is so dumb and pointless.

— Oh good, the obligatory obento scene. Gee, I was wondering why I hadn’t seen one yet despite the season having five full harem anime series. As the haremette is literally hand-feeding him, Yuuji thinks to himself, “Do I really have the right to accept a little piece of happiness like this?” Gimme a fucking break. But thankfully, the episode is over. Yeah, it literally just comes to an end as Amane is stuffing our harem lead’s face full with food. Uguu, guys, the girls at this school are totally crazy, and this is going to be a wild ride–…

this guy

…harem anime never changes.

— By the way, it’s going to be hard to top this episode. Ushinawareta Mirai wo Motomete’s got its work cut out for it if the anime wants to hold onto first place.


Madan no Ou to Vanadis Ep. 3

Madan no Ou to Vanadis - 0311

— If you’ll recall, Tigre saved his Titta from imminent rape. Now, he’s going to strike back at the rapist with Elen in tow. In other words, anime is still obsessed with rape.

— Parts of Zion’s army are in shambles, and now that a Vanadis has joined the fight, it’s unlikely that he’ll win the ensuing battle. It’s thus time to turn tail and run, right? Nah, he just swears revenge against Tigre instead.

— Oh lord, I fucking hate light novel adaptations. Really? Do you really need to show me this? Well, I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. Satelight did work on the first season of Log Horizon, after all. Still, they can’t even make the CGI look good.

— A battle is about to break out any moment now, but Titta can’t help but ask if Elen and Tigre are a thing. Welp, gotta keep our priorities straight. Is this primarily a harem anime or a war anime? A harem anime, of course! And boy howdy, are we thankful for that! Who needs to see exciting battles and backdoor political machinations? I want to see the maid blush as she chokes out that question to the big-breasted warrior! When Elen reiterates that Tigre belongs to her, the maid then yells, “I-I won’t be outdone.” Sorry, Titta… but for you, it really is just all in the name. You sadly can’t compete.

— Yay, more troop movement bullshit.

Madan no Ou to Vanadis - 0304

— Finally, we see the actual battle unfold, but the anime keeps the camera pinned up close to the characters. To actually pull the camera out and let us see the entire scene would be too taxing on Satelight’s animators, I’m sure. Oh well, I wasn’t expecting to be wowed, anyway. We see two sides of horribly copy-pasted CGI models run at each other once, but we cut away as soon as those two sides are about to clash.

— I really hate how the action is interrupted by yet more unnecessary narration. These light novel adaptations just can’t help themselves, can they? For the people not watching this show but are still reading these posts for whatever reason, Lim’s troops have flanked the bad guys, and this allows Elen to go one-on-one with a dragon.

— By one-on-one, I really meant that she would just summon a tornado that somehow cleaves a giant dragon in half. Done and done. Not even one iota of excitement.

— Elen tells Tigre that this ability uses too much force, so she doesn’t use it on people. But that poor dragon was probably just following its evil masters’ orders. Oh well, dragons have no rights, I guess.

— More narration! Whee!

Madan no Ou to Vanadis - 0312

— The sad thing is, the story feels the need to talk down to its audience. Alright, what happened is this. Zion thought a unit of 2,000 soldiers was about to flank him. He didn’t realize, however, that the vast majority of those soldiers were really just unmanned horses. Fine, just show me that. The anime doesn’t also need to tell me that the horses were unmanned. Just more pointless narration from anime’s school of storytelling, because the people who adapt these stories must honestly think we’re too stupid to believe our own eyes.

— Anyway, with Zion now cornered, his advisers tell him to unleash the flying dragon as well. C’mon, no more innocent animals should have to die for your stupid war games. Just surrender already.

— Naturally, the guy wants to save himself. In doing so, he’d probably prevent more unnecessary deaths for his own soldiers. Unfortunately, this act of surrendering is portrayed by the anime as cowardly. Hm.

— I love how the show cuts away from the boring plastic toys on a map stuff only to show us the running animation of the horses’ feet. That’s right, just the horses’ feet. You can tell Satelight’s operating on a shoestring budget. Maybe they shouldn’t have chosen to adapt an anime that would require them to animate war scenes.

Madan no Ou to Vanadis - 0313

— And of course, Zion is a paper-thin caricature of a villain. Tigre accuses the guy of mistreating his people, so our hero gets this response: “They’re like plant life, which grows back when you cut it down! What do you care about them?”

— In his last ditch attempt for revenge, Zion challenges Tigre to a duel. There’s really no good reason for our hero to accept, but he does so anyway. After all, he’s got plot armor on. And hell, even this foolishness ends up impressing Elen, so from that point of view, it’s just a win-win for Tigre.

— Tigre is so amazing, he can hit the same spot on Zion’s shield over and over until an arrow eventually manages to go right through the armor completely. As a result, the arrow penetrates the bad guy’s arm. Grisly. Is it really that impressive, though? In a world full of powerful maidens — maidens that can literally control the elements — who cares about some guy’s accuracy with a bow? Yo, the heroine just split a dragon in twain, and yet she’s obsessed with a dude who can shoot a bow really well. C’mon. Plus, it seems weird to me that the story would pride itself on its military strategy, but at the same time, have these characters that are practically living gods on earth.

— Zion’s army then runs at Tigre to try and save their lord. In return, Elen’s army runs at them to defend Tigre! In the resulting fracas, Zion tries to escape on his flying dragon. Oh no, we can’t let such a bad guy get away! So the bow — yes, the bow — starts telling Tigre to shoot the dragon. Yo, it’s just following orders. Don’t do it, man.

Madan no Ou to Vanadis - 0314

— It turns out Elen’s sword is lending Tigre its strength. And with one arrow, Tigre kills both Zion and the dragon. Welp. That’s the end of the episode. Sure, it doesn’t have a lot of fanservice like the previous two harem anime, but Madan no Ou to Vanadis is not without its stupid moments.


Trinity Seven Ep. 2

— It doesn’t matter how interesting a premise might be. At the end of the day, most harem anime will return to its natural habitat: the high school classroom. If anything, stories like Madan no Ou to Vanadis are the freaks of the harem anime world.

— Basically, Arin, who looks a lot like Arata’s cousin, has taken a special interest in the harem lead. She now follows him around and stares at him all day.

Trinity Seven - 0202

It sounds boring, but thanks to the show’s shitty animation, it’s really not!

— She even tries to follow him into the boy’s restroom, but even this harem lead has his limits.

Why is she so obsessed with him? Why, it’s because he’s a candidate to become the demon lord, of course! Ah yes, the demon lord. Where would we be without a demon lord story?

— This season is quite amazing in its comprehensiveness, actually. First, we have a show all about making a school a better place. You always have to have at least one harem anime that is lame as fuck. Then, you have the show that tries to be edgy by teasing us with the possibility of its haremettes going crazy on us. Naturally, we’ve been fooled. Next, you have a show that pretends to be of a different genre altogether! Don’t worry, this is really a story about medieval politics and war! Not. Fourth, we have that show with a pretentious name, and as such, wacky timeline-altering shenanigans are involved. But at the end of the day, the basic core principles are the same: a boring story about a boring harem lead at a boring fucking high school. Last and very least, Trinity Seven stays true to its harem roots. Magical school! Alchemy! Demon Lord! And of course, a heavy dose of sickening family love. Ah… harem anime at its best!

— So she’s keeping an eye on him, right? She won’t let him become a demon lord and endanger everyone, right? Wrong: “…because I’m going to be the demon lord’s spouse, supposedly.” Right, right… as you were, then.

— Arata then returns to his room to find it filled with girls. Ho-hum, another day in a harem lead’s life. Pfft, you’re not even trying, Lilith.

Trinity Seven - 0206

— Our “hero” jokes that he would assault Lilith first if he ever fell under the influence of a love potion. Ha ha, aren’t rape jokes funny? The best part? Lilith looked at him all expectantly until he finally gave his answer. Then it’s like a flip switched inside of her, and she realized she had to blush and act all tsundere. Blah blah blah, virgin-whore dichotomy. She needs the harem lead’s attention, but at the same time, she will abuse him for paying attention to her.

— But that’s enough hijinks for now, because even a harem anime will pretend as though it has a story to tell. We thus move into a harem anime’s next and equally boring phase: the exposition.

— Yadda yadda yadda, the small book in Arata’s possession is really the Astil Codex. Yadda yadda yadda, it houses knowledge of another world. But in its spare time, it moonlights as a haremette who looks a lot like Arata’s cousin. Funny how that works. Then we get some talk about Thema this, Thema that. Magic is truly amazing.

— In the middle of all this fascinating infodumping, the show gets antsy because of the lack of fanservice. As a result, a random blackout occurs. As always, when the lights come back on, the harem lead will have one of his paws on a girl’s breast. But there are three girls! Whose breast will he molest! That’s an easy question to answer. The more likely the girl is to blush and scream, the more likely it is that she’ll be sexually assaulted! Isn’t this fun! Our decision depends wholly upon the girl’s sense of shame!

Trinity Seven - 0208

— But y’see, the above logic only applies to the average, boring ol’ harem lead. Arata’s a demon lord, so obviously, he has to grope Lilith’s big breasts, faceplant himself into Levy’s crotch, and… uh, he’s just going to lie on top of Selina. But still, three birds with one magical rapey stone.

— Somehow, our harem lead and the three girls are trapped in a barrier. The grimoire in Arata’s possession knows how they could escape, but apparently, it’s a game so our demon lord should just try and figure it out. But meh, this is a harem anime, so it’s not like we’ll get a clever riddle or anything.

— Rather, the focus soon turns to the fact that barrier lacks a restroom. Yep, that’s right. One of our haremettes really needs to pee. So step right up, Lilith-sensei! You get the honor of pissing your panties for our enjoyment! I swear, harem anime series act as if urine is this magical, golden fluid that can save lives or some shit. I don’t care if it’s your fetish, but that’s my point. It is a fetish, but somehow, it’s become this universally erotic thing that you get to see in every fucking show and not just the harem ones (see: the most recent Cross Ange episode).

— Sure enough, Levy feels the need to relieve herself as well. Yo, it ain’t puking, guys. Seeing that one person needs to urinate doesn’t suddenly make you all want to go to the restroom. Not wanting Selina to feel left out, Levy hypnotizes the girl until she wants to wet herself as well. Awesome crab mentality, guys. If I have to humiliate myself, you’re all humiliating yourselves too. I just like how the harem lead is immune to this bit of humiliation, though.

Trinity Seven - 0212

— Aaaaaaand they proceed to huddle up and have pee shivers together.

Jags_fan

Seriously, who comes up with this shit?

— Luckily for the girls, our harem lead is a bit nicer than, say, the one in Hagure Yuusha no Estetica. As such, he tricks his grimoire into giving him the solution to the puzzle, thus saving his room from smelling like piss for a week straight.

— Arin admits later that she was responsible for the barrier. But is Arata mad? Of course not: “I got to see the bizarrely appealing sight of three hot girls trying their hardest not to pee themselves!” Hm… nope, nope, I don’t believe I’ve ever felt turned on by the idea of a girl pissing herself.

— But, uh, don’t give Arin any weird ideas, because…

Trinity Seven - 0213

…not surprisingly, Arata turns down Arin’s offer. Yo, it’s just not the same if the girl is a willing participant!

— But never mind the water sports. Let’s ask Arin why she trapped the harem lead in a barrier. Her explanation? The headmaster had suggested that a breakdown phenomenon would occur if she did so. Suddenly, Arin tries to induce the harem lead into creating the breakdown phenomenon again by removing the limits that his grimoire had placed on his magical abilities. According to Lilith, everyone around them is slowly breaking down into elementary particles. I like that this just means a hazy black fog covers the room.

— Still, we haven’t gotten to the root of the problem: why is Arin doing this? She thus gives us the dumbest answer possible: her Thema is all about destruction, so it’s her duty to study it. Yep, even if it means destroying the entire school, it’s her duty!

— The headmaster is unfazed, though: “It’d be lots of fun if the school would just collapse on us now….” That’s the mentality I’d love any headmaster to have!

— Arata sprouts dark, emo wings. According to Lilith, the entire planet is in danger. She’s got to take the guy out with her magic now! Arin, however, steps in front of Lilith’s gun as she won’t let the harem lead die: “He’s my husband.”

seriously

No point in having a husband if the entire planet is destroyed. Just sayin’.

— But she can’t stop Mira and Akio, who show up to kill Arata. The episode ends just as Akio’s kick was about to connect, but I don’t even know why they bother with these pointless cliffhangers. There ain’t a single soul on this planet who would believe that Arata will die. Oh well. Until next time, pee-lovers.


Ushinawareta Mirai wo Motomete Ep. 3

— So it’s day seven of, uh, let’s just call it the second cycle, and I’m still waiting for another bad end to occur. Unfortunately, all that happened in last week’s episode was Yui recovering her memories. Boring, huh?

— But even though she’s recovered her memories, it’s not like we’ll get any answers to the show’s bigger questions. Nagisa says she won’t press the issue — why the fuck not? — and of course, Yui asks her not to say anything to the other members of the Astronomy Club. Welp. I guess our already dull-as-fuck anime will stay that way for just a little longer (read: a lot longer).

Ushinawareta Mirai wo Motomete - 0305

— We start off a new day in terrific form as Airi has a dream about the harem lead. I’m not surprised. After all, he’s such a catch.

— We soon learn that the guy spent all night playing video games. Truly, truly a catch.

— Still, Airi meets up with her friends, and they’re surprised to see her. After all, she’s almost always late to school. It turns out, however, that if she gets another tardy warning, she’ll have to repeat the grade despite her top scores. Hm, there’s a lot of focus on Airi in this week’s episode… might it be her turn to get a bad end? Meh, I should really stop getting my hopes up. The chances of this anime entertaining me might as well be zero.

— We get some flashbacks regarding Airi’s past. Basically, she was good at everything, but she soon became self-conscious of her own accomplishments. As a result, she stopped trying her hardest, and this also prevented her from making friends? Shrug, whatever. Long story short, the super friendly Kaori reached out to her, and because of this, Airi was inspired to do her best again. Now, they’re BFFs… BFFs who are fighting over one guy. Sweet!

Welp.

— Ho hum, the six friends enjoy lunch on the rooftop. Airi also announces that she wants to investigate the mystery surrounding the ghost later that day. Great.

Ushinawareta Mirai wo Motomete - 0302

— Oh, I get it now! It’s the classic “Americans are all fat pigs” joke! And when we saw her in BDSM gear in last week’s episode, it was the classic “American girls are all perverts unlike our virginal Japanese maidens” joke! Hah, you’re so funny, Ushinawareta Mirai wo Motomete!

— Once again, the Judo and Karate Clubs are coming to blows. You should remember this. We saw this same incident in the first episode. Just the thought of watching these same events unfold over and over, however, has me quite exasperated.

— Alright, alright… how will the conflict between those two clubs be different this time?

— Somehow, Yui can see into the future, so she thinks that if she can prevent Kaori from hurting her ankle in the upcoming incident, maybe she won’t get the bad end that we saw in the first week. So she tells her friend that the latter mustn’t follow the rest of the club to settle the dispute. Needless to say, Kaori doesn’t heed Yui’s advice, and as far as she knows, there’s really no reason to. When they get there, however, Yui drags Kaori out of the dojo just as things are about to get ugly. So instead, it’s the harem lead who gets injured! Wait, wait, does this mean he will get run over by a bus? Oh, one can only hope!

— Afterwards, it’s boring ghost investigation time. In the middle of it, Sou collapses from the injuries he had sustained.

Ushinawareta Mirai wo Motomete - 0311

Out of all the harem leads this season, this guy has to be the most pathetic. Seriously, think about it. Kyotaro’s a bookworm, but he’s still smart. Yuuji tries too hard to be an alpha male, but he’s probably a hitman or some shit. Tigre is practically Elen’s slave, but he’s a crackshot with his bow. And of course, Arata is a demon lord candidate who can break matter down into its elementary particles. As for Sou, well… he likes stars? Let’s ask his friends what they think of him.

Nagisa: “In spite of everything, I guess Sou-san is still a guy, after all.”

Well, that’s a start. Congrats, Sou! You’re a guy!

— Speaking of Nagisa, she and Kenny go to interview some old man in the library. He tells them that he saw the ghost too! Oh boy! Let’s hear a story! At the same time, Kaori and Yui see a ghost in an adjacent building’s window. Oooh, 3spooky5me!

— Elsewhere, Airi encourages the harem lead to work out so that he can protect Kaori. Hm, seems like counter-intuitive advice to me if she really likes him. Still, this gets them to talk about how they first met. Apparently, she kicked him for complimenting her. What a pleasant girl.

Ushinawareta Mirai wo Motomete - 0312

— It turns out that the ghost Kaori had seen wasn’t a ghost at all. Instead, it was the Film Club screwing around, trying to film people’s scared reactions. So Airi beats them up, and these familiar words flash onscreen. How meta of us. Still, what a boring development for this show. Just when you thought something was going to happen, it turns out the ghost Kaori had seen was just a fake. Man…

— Not only that, Airi’s content with this explanation; she thinks that this one incident alone explains all of the other ghost sightings. Little does she know, there really is a ghost. Oooooooh~

— But that’s it. Another week comes and goes, and yet again, nothing happens in Ushinawareta Mirai wo Motomete.


Week 3’s Poll

Once again, I have to say that Grisaia no Kajitsu and Ushinawareta Mirai wo Motomete are the top contenders for the worst harem episode of the week. But might Trinity Seven and its pee fetish win out? Find out in next week’s episode of Dragon Ball Z!

Advertisements

23 thoughts on “Fall 2014 Harem Hill, Week 3: Just the highlights

  1. Felow

    The director for Grisaia said to expect a “huge shift in tone” starting with episode 4. Going by the episode title of four, though, it’s just more wacky comedy (the episode titles correspond to the names of scenes in the VN).

    There’s definitely the super serious content you seem to crave from your harem anime coming eventually, but the director sure is taking his sweet time getting there. I’ll chalk it up to trying to get the audience “attached” to the characters, though his success is arguable.

    Reply
    1. andmeuths

      That’s the risk I think the director runs by showing too much of the Common Route – on one hand, you got to please those BD buying fanbase that might with-hold their wallets if their favorite “comedy” common route scenes (note the quotations) were left out. On the second hand, the risk of dragging the Common Route out is that those her for the “Dark” content will drop the show before it get’s to the point. And of course, the show is not exactly helping with all those fan service.

      There’s no excusing “Amane Sou is a bitch in the heat” – it’s down right offensive, though it suggest that Makina is a very cruel character under that child like mask.

      I do find Amane’s role interesting in the second half – she seems very open that she’s this way because she’s a very needy person. Of course, the show might have a very stupid reason behind all those foreshadowing. However, it also violates show don’t tell – and more or less, the ending of the episode, when Yuuji muses whether that “happiness” is justified was basically the director whispering to the audience – “It’ll get better and darker soon ! I promise!”

      Of course, the Episode 4 preview and title could be a lie, the first half would be common route rubbish before the show tries to shock us at the mid way mark or something.

      Reply
  2. Gene

    I’ve seen people say Grisaia is great, but as you say, the show has been a total bore. But people also said Mahouka was good. I dropped all of these after the first episode but I still check out your posts on them for laughs. Actually watching would hurt too much.

    Reply
  3. eternia

    Grasaia really should take the first rank for this week.
    Even common ecchi anime has a story.
    But this anime doesn’t have it.
    I was rolling my eyes the whole time, what is this all about?
    The anime studio should just disband after this.

    Reply
  4. LongTimeLurker

    Re: Grisaia, E Minor missed the worst thing about the episode: Amane is an awful person, and it feels like she’s being set up as the main love interest.

    I found the stuff that didn’t involve Amane genuinely funny, though. For someone who uses so much sarcasm, E Minor is oddly humorless.

    Reply
      1. Anonymous

        Little sensitive aren’t we? Lord, it’s not like he called you a name. If you take the time to diss others who like certain anime, which is cool, that’s kinda the point of these reviews, fine. But be ready to take it too. Just sayin, not trying to throw shade

        Reply
        1. E Minor Post author

          I have not insulted anyone for liking certain anime. I focus on the anime itself. If you come here and insult me, of course I’m going to take issue with it. Everyone gets one shot at me. Then since it is my blog, I can choose to tune them out. If you want to rant some more, you’re free to do so elsewhere, are you not? So please, proceed to do that.

  5. Anonymous

    Madan no Ou to Vanadis
    Trinity Seven

    I like them because these pages and make several other anime reviews here is better

    Reply
  6. lost

    “Which of them sucked the most?” – god, how am I supposed to choose something like that? Ugh, if pushed into a corner I’ll give my vote to Grisaia if for no reason other than that there was a small moment where I thought they might be able to do something interesting with a “yandere harem” setup.

    Reply
  7. Pia

    I’m watching every harem in your list minus Moete so certainly is hard to choose which one sucked harder this week, Trinity seven and Grisaia were the worst for me, but if I have to choose only 1 then Grisaia, both were trashy with their grotesque fan service however Grisaia felt more like a filler episode, so it was a bigger waste of time also their jokes suck ass and they drag them for too long, I wonder whats wrong with these psychos, I thought they would be killing a la Higurashi by this time.

    Reply
    1. E Minor Post author

      Difference is that Higurashi doesn’t have h-scene. You don’t pretend to be a good person just to get some cheap 2-D titillation.

      Reply
  8. Naota

    And of course, Zion is a paper-thin caricature of a villain. Tigre accuses the guy of mistreating his people, so our hero gets this response: “They’re like plant life, which grows back when you cut it down! What do you care about them?

    This line annoyed me even more because it’s clearly inspired by an actual belief, only the character himself is so hyperbolic and one-note that it misses the original context. You know what would’ve worked better? Any of these:
    -“They suffer, and they will bear it. Better this than to see the kingdom fall to Zhcted (pffft) tyranny.”
    -“It’s the lot of the people to suffer in war. If you cared you would not have brought it to their doorstep.”
    -“A soldier lives and dies for the sake of his lord. They merely fulfilled their duty.”
    -“I am their liege. If they die, they die with honour.”
    Or even:
    -“Their lives are a loss the kingdom can suffer. If they wished otherwise, perhaps they should have been born dukes.”

    This guy doesn’t need to look down on his soldiers to remind us that they’re seen as merely tools of the nobility, especially in front of these same soldiers. Them being less important than him is just the way of things, probably not even a question in his mind, so why would he use it as an insult? Plus, he’s a human being. Class differences or not I’m sure he would at least get that people don’t like being sacked, plundered, and raped. Where’s his justification for believing commoners are worthless? All I’m seeing is the author deflecting the question with more jerkassery.

    Reply
      1. Naota

        If it was just another harem anime, I wouldn’t bother to do its work for it as a thought exercise. The thing with Vanadis is that somewhere in there it’s making an earnest attempt at being a medieval-themed war drama. It wants to be taken seriously and regarded as more than just set dressing on a pair of prominent Tittas, but its so be-laden with harem anime-isms, irksome tropes, and fan-pandering anachronisms that it finds itself down in the brig with the other Fall animes of low character. It’s off in the corner right now, shaking off a hangover as it realizes it’s sharing a bunk with the likes of Cross Ange.

        Reply
  9. Senpai

    Grisaisa’s box cutter girl seems lie a blatant rip-off of Senjougahara from Bakemonogatari, from her personality, hair, to weapons. I know that you personally dislike Bakemonogatari, E Minor, but she is still a good character in my eyes.

    Reply
    1. Naota

      Isn’t that kind of a tragic fate for a character, though? No matter what happens they can never transcend the original idea they’ve been copied wholesale from. This girl being Senjougahara in everything but name just makes me wonder why I’m not watching the series that made Senjougahara a character worth remembering.

      As someone who quite enjoyed Bakemonogatari, I just see Grisaia’s cast as lazy imitators lowering the proverbial stock of these ideas by repeating them note for note. Where Bakemonogatari stood out because it was unconventional (in presentation, visuals, stylistic choices), Grisaia steals – blatantly and without shame – a handful of its more obvious traits and uses them to tell a story everyone has seen a thousand times.

      Reply

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s