Finally, the power of God and anime are on my side!
The Klutzy Class Monitor and the Girl with the Short Skirt Ep. 11
Togo and Poem still haven’t mended the rift between them, which is disappointing to see. Obviously, the show is saving this for the finale. Poem clearly misses him, and during the dance, he’ll have an opportunity to prove once and for all that he can change and be more flexible for her. But they still missed spending time together for the vast majority of the cultural festival in order to set up this dramatic conclusion, so eh… I think the story’s priorities are outta whack. Look, these kids just started dating. For them to have a major fight like this already doesn’t bode well for the future.
Meanwhile, Nadeshiko has a plan to convince Kaoru to stop being such a stick in the mud about the dance: she’ll just flirt with him as her “alter ego.” Naturally, Kaoru is still as clueless as ever, because he still doesn’t realize he’s just talking to Nadeshiko in a gyaru get-up. It’s like with that Smoking Behind the Supermarket with You show; these guys are too stupid to recognize the women they love. Is this supposed to be romantic?
There were scenes concerning other side characters, but I don’t care.
LIAR GAME Ep. 11
Hm, Akiyama makes a good point at the start of the episode: doubting people is one way of getting to know them better. On the other hand, a lot of people will say they trust you, but they never really bother to get to know you either. In reality, that’s just indifference. Something to think about. For now, because Nao saved all of their asses, the other contestants should rally behind her. Should. But people can flip-flop dramatically once the chips are down.
I like this sort of thing. I like examining characters and what makes them tick. Unfortunately, when they start yapping about the rules of each round, how to play, what’s the best strategy, blah blah blah, my eyes glaze over. Basically, I wish this was a straightforward drama or thriller about people and their nature — perhaps even their propensity to lie and cheat. I totally understand that the Liar Game is designed specifically to facilitate that, but the games — outside of the first one against Nao’s former teacher — are just so needlessly elaborate. As a result, everything gets bogged down by minutia that ends up really not mattering in the grand scheme of things. I mean, do you still remember the details and nuances of how round one played out? Or round two? No, you recall the broad strokes about the characters, not the game itself. You remember Nao’s naivete, Akiyama’s cold logic, Fukunaga’s selfish opportunism. You don’t remember how Akiyama fooled Fukunaga during… which round were we talking about again? I mean, he’s done it so many times now. Well, I don’t remember those exact details. Maybe your memory recall is better than mine. Nevertheless, I can’t help but feel that so much time has been wasted on minor details.
So of course, when the officials start explaining this 72-hour contraband game where war breaks out at the end, how you need to smuggle money, how you need to deceive the inspector, and and and… it just goes on and on. There are so many steps. I instantly remember why I’m not as invested in this show as I should be. By the time the official is done explaining the game, there are only four minutes left in the episode and we still gotta leave room for the ED! There’s no time left for, well, anything! As I scan the faces in the room, the reality is that I really don’t recognize any of them outside of the three major characters, i.e. Nao, Akiyama and Fukunaga. The rest don’t matter (and why are there so few women?).
MARRIAGETOXIN Ep. 11
This arc with the Beast Clan is honestly getting a bit too long in the tooth, and like with most shows with similar narrative issues, the main problem here is that the villains are just not interesting. What can we even say about Toshiro other than that he’s a mad scientist who hates the world? Usually in these kind of stories, the arc villain serves as the foil to the main character, but I don’t find Hikaru interesting either. It’s like multiplying by zero. You still get nothing.
Then there’s the predictable narrative structure. We have two baddies left to overcome: Toshiro and his servant Byakko. I know immediately that this episode is all about Piichi flexing his skills and fighting Byakko. I mean, you gotta save the last boss for the last episode, right? And the hero has to fight the last boss. Of course, we get Byakko’s sob story right before she has her big fight and loses. Is she dead? I don’t even know. Has any of the major bad guys in this series ever been killed? Major ones, I have to emphasize. Sure, sure, the jobbers have died. But Byakko looks too important (read: hot) to die.
So Toshiro absorbs her blood and becomes super strong, and now it’s Hikaru’s turn to fight. The anime tries to suggest that he might have injected too much toxin this time around, but c’mon, you know he’ll be fine. I’m also pretty sure Kimie and her hamsters will find some way to play a critical role in the final battle. Yawn. Good animation alone can’t carry a show when the characters are flat and boring.
I Want to End This Love Game Ep. 10
The two kids keep using the Pocky challenge as an excuse to kiss. Eventually, Yukiya just straight up grabs and firmly kisses Miku without replacing the Pocky stick between them. This is progress, right? Well, even at 4x speed, this scene felt like torture to get through. Then afterwards, once they go their separate ways, he somehow has the gall to doubt whether or not she actually likes him. They basically just made out in a public park, but gosh I dunno, guys, does she really, really like me?
But Miku isn’t any better. Rather than be happy that she finally got to kiss the guy she likes, she starts crying because he doesn’t call her cute anymore. Sigh, this is why you don’t play games. Girl, it’s not that deep. He’s just a dumb, insecure boy.
Well, Miku doesn’t come to school the next day, and she’s ghosting Yukiya. Sigh, kids… well, Yukiya can tell she’s been crying, so he runs dramatically to be by her side. And of course, the episode ends on this cliffhanger, if you can even call it one. I mean, sure, technically, this feels like a cliffhanger. But I dunno, man, I’m not exactly dying to find out what happens next.
Always a Catch! Ep. 12
Is this the last episode? It kinda feels like the last episode. It also feels empty. The girls are worried about all the nobles gossiping about them and their “affairs.” After all, Renato tried to publicly dumped Aida, then immediately acquired a new fiancee in Maria. But as soon as everyone sees the girls dancing with their respective princes, no one has a bad thing to say. Like really? That’s it? A freaking dance is enough to convince the nobles that Maria is fit to be queen? Well, lemme assure you, bitch ass people who are willing to gossip behind your back won’t stop just because you look nice on the dance floor.
Ultimately, the problem with this show is that it isn’t really about anything except rich people being rich. It has a quasi-villainess setup where the prince humiliates the heroine at a party, but that was just a misunderstanding. Most decent villainess shows will either have an interesting gimmick, or the villainess goes on to do something amazing once she’s been “liberated” from having to marry the generic prince. Despite their infamous label, the best villainess characters are aspirational in some form or fashion. But Maria doesn’t do any of that. She doesn’t really do anything really, except for the one time she stopped some bandits on the way home. She doesn’t become a great businesswoman, learn to govern, become a great mage, or anything. She learns how to dance. Woo, I guess.
And of course, we have another anime where the couple is destined to marry, but they don’t even kiss. Instead, we end on Maria barely managing to refer to her future husband by his name and name alone. Y’all are kids. Y’all aren’t ready to get married.
Gals Can’t Be Kind to Otaku!? Ep. 11
The school festival drags on. On the second day, the girls keep getting invited to the fireworks event by random guys, but they only have the same otaku dork in their hearts. Meanwhile, Takuya feels anxious at the idea that either of his gyaru friends might date someone else even though he also thinks he’s not good enough for them. Ugh. The episode tries to end on that tense note, but why do we even bother? We know he’s just going to end up with both Kotoko and Amane when the fireworks go off. The status quo will be maintained. It must be maintained. He’s not going to pick one of them, and they wouldn’t allow him to anyway. At the same time, this show also isn’t bold enough to start a poly relationship. It’s gonna be one huge nothingburger.
Haibara’s Teenage New Game+ Ep. 11
Aw, the girlies promise to stay friends forever even though they’re both gunning for the same loser. It’s almost heart-warming.
The rest of the episode is still all about the band and Natsuki’s struggles within it. He has a hard time singing and playing guitar at the same time, he has a hard time writing lyrics, and most of all, he has a hard time choosing between the two girls. Ugh, why must life be so hard for us ojisans!
But seriously, does anyone actually think he would choose Uta? There are only two possibilities: he goes for Hikari, whom he was always gunning for, or he chickens out and chooses nobody. There is no third possibility where Uta wins.
Petals of Reincarnation Ep. 11
Watching Yagyu fight Haito, I was simply waiting for the shoe to drop, i.e. the former to back down. Knowing how these stories are written, I couldn’t see her being the one to bring Haito back to her senses. It has to be Toya and only Toya. My point is, when you write yourself into a corner like this, it renders everything else meaningless. The fight between the two girls is a pointless exercise. We’re simply killing time until the story finally decides to advance. So naturally, Yagyu discovers that she’s too injured to keep fighting Haito. As a result, she’s going to train Toya to do it instead. See, what did I say? We wasted half of the episode for nothing.
As for the other half of the episode, the evil Einstein challenges the good Einstein for… ah, I don’t even care anymore. This feels like it should be the more important plot. After all, the fate of the world is at stake, but I don’t know these characters nor do I care about their fates. Like where did evil Einstein even come from? On the other hand, Einstein watching a brainwashed Newton punching himself to avoid hurting her should hit you in the feels, but they’re both woefully underdeveloped characters.
The Barbarian’s Bride Ep. 10
We pay a visit to the land of the dwarves, and it’s an industrial hellscape. Just dark, black metal everywhere. But this show is all about living with nature and all that jazz, so we’ll just pretend that there’s absolutely no pollution going on here. Nuh-uh, no siree, Bob! We just have ways of refining metals… uh, cleanly! No industrial waste or runoffs whatsoever! All that smoke in the distance? Just good, ol’ harmless steam coming out of those giant columns!
Anyway, the only reason we’re visiting the dwarves is for the hot springs, so come get your fanservice. Drink it all in. Veor is certainly getting his money’s worth. There’s really nothing else to talk about, ’cause literally nothing important happens. Serafina sees Veor’s giant dick and freaks out. That’s it. We also learn that the dwarves get horny over armor, and Serafina apparently has the sexiest armor of them all…?
Last but not least, why are there torii gates down here? What do torii gates have to do with fantasy dwarves? Whatever, man. This show is so damn vapid.
Scenes from Awajima Ep. 10
There are multiple stories (as usual) in this episode, but I really only want to focus on one of them: we revisit the relationship between Katsurako and Emi Okabe yet again. This time, we see events from the former’s point of view, i.e. how she tried to befriend Emi, how she got incredibly jealous when Emi defended Yukie, so on and so forth. We already know how the rest of this story played out (tragically). So why? Why are we doing replaying these dark, emotional beats? Well, Katsurako is now confined to a hospital bed, so maybe her regrets are weighing ever heavier on her mind. She needs to find her peace before she passes on, and she probably feels as though her decades of service at Awajima has not made up for her youthful mistakes. In other words, It feels we’re dredging up old, negative memories as a form of mental self-flagellation. Before the credits roll, she asks Wakana if the latter, now a woman with a fruitful writing career, ever regretted enrolling at Awajima. Hopefully, Wakana’s answer can give her soul the deliverance it desperately desires.
Killed again, Mr. Detective. Ep. 11
Hm, when Sakuya was reading about the potentially amazing drug that can bestow immortality, I thought we were going to get his family’s origin story. Maybe there’s still a link in there somewhere. Anyway, turns out Lu is the killer — it’s always the sweet, innocent-looking ones — and she’s doing it for revenge. The sight of her leaping from the rooftop with her prosthetics, however, is beyond silly. It looks goofy as all hell.
Char tricked everyone by messing with the clocks, so time’s up and the missiles hit the island. I can’t see any important character dying, however, so this cliffhanger doesn’t really do anything for me.
The Angel Next Door Spoils Me Rotten S2 Ep. 11
Yup, Amane admits he’s getting a part-time job just to get Mahiru an engagement ring. This is so stupid. So, so, stupid. If you’re going to save up for anything at least make it a house. Yes, a house costs way more, but jewelry is functionally worthless. But what truly tickles me is how he doesn’t want Mahiru to see him in uniform and working at a cafe. He just can’t! It’s too embawwassing~. Bro, you’re not ready to get married.
Snowball Earth Ep. 11
After losing, Sagami suffers from a breakdown, so we are treated to his backstory. Guess what? Mommy and daddy didn’t love lil’ Sagami, so he decided to fuck humanity over. No, really. He’s the one who sabotaged that space battle at the start of the series. In the end, a disgusted Tetsuo basically just hands the title of “savior” over. This is why Sagami was never an interesting villain. Terrible personality, even worse motivations. Just an idiot, but an idiot with a lot of power. As we’ve seen throughout history, that is a scary combination. How long is this season supposed to be anyway? We’ve wasted so much time on this loser.
The Drops of God Ep. 10
This episode feels oddly rushed. I expect each round of the contest to be a fullblown investigation, but by the end, the boys have already picked out their wines. Not only that, we waste a bunch of time on some new hire. Essentially, the company literally picked someone who doesn’t even drink wine to join the wine division, so Shizuku wastes half of the episode trying to find a bottle that would entice the guy. Naturally, he succeeds in doing so. Hell, just the mere act of decanting the wine is enough to give the new guy euphoric visions of a field of flowers. Or… you could just hire someone who actually likes wine?
Anyway, the theme of the third round is all wine that gives you a certain feeling of nostalgia, but like I said, we don’t really focus too much on the hunt this time around. In fact, there seems to be some kind of love triangle subplot brewing with Issei. Y’see, he brought back that Chinese girl he met in the desert, but now Maki’s all jealous. Bro, what is this? I thought this was a show about wine.
Agents of the Four Seasons: Dance of Spring Ep. 12
Oh look, more tearful flashbacks and “Uuuuuuuuu, I will protect Hinagiku!@!@!” No, not gonna bother. I don’t care what happened with Misuzu. I don’t care how the “other” Hinagiku died that day. I don’t care what any of these characters feel anymore. I just want the results now. Wake me up when Hinagiku and Rosei finally meet.
The strongest job is apparently not a hero or a sage, but an appraiser (provisional)! Ep. 12
I have no damn clue what just happened or why anything is happening. Ivel tells Hibiki that he needs to die for world peace, but of course, she doesn’t elaborate. So we don’t understand her aims or motivations nor who she’s working for. And in the end, she doesn’t even die because the body they’re fighting is just a doll. What a copout.
In the middle of battle, Hibiki’s consciousness gets whisked away to have a conversation with the mysterious girl who looks like a genderbent version of himself. Or maybe it would be more apt to say he looks like a genderbent version of her. Either way, she is apparently the God of Reason. According to the chief god, if she wakes up, she will destroy the world…? From the sounds of it, she doesn’t like how the gods are in control of everything. But a mere boy, i.e. Hibiki, tells her “Golly gee, I sure had a ton of fun in this world, durr hut!” so the God of Reason decides to go back to sleep. Excuse me? I know I abhor excessive exposition and lore dumps, but we literally understand nothing. What is her connection to Hibiki? Why does he look like her? Why was she asleep in the first place? Why does she flip-flop on whether this isekai reality gets to exist simply because one kid expressed a different opinion? “Oh man, I have all these convictions! But wait, you’re telling me you’re having fun? Okay, nevermind then!”
Anyway, the God of Reason powers Hibiki up, then goes back to sleep. Hibiki then wakes up and uses the power of friendship to beat Ivel. He even summons Emalia temporarily to help out, so they’re finally reunited for like a hot second. Then like Team fucking Rocket, Ivel just says her goodbyes and teleports away. And just like that, the show is over. What an inconsequential fart of a story that explained utterly nothing. I see people try and say things like, “Oh, I had fun with it.” Man, get better standards.
Scum of the Brave Ep. 22
Let’s go through this step-by-step. Jougamine refuses to fight in a way that can potentially take her opponent’s life, because she’s a goody-two-shoes. But now that we know what she is, i.e. practically immortal, there’s nothing wrong with her being stubborn. She can afford to put herself at risk, because she can’t die (easily). So why not stick to her ideals? At this point, Yashiro needs to stop being petty because she can be virtuous and he can’t.
Then it’s Yashiro’s turn to fight Levi, and that was pretty anticlimactic. He has no problems chopping off her hand. Apparently, she’s gotten rusty from fighting weaker opponents? Whatever. We learn that E4 was created to try and achieve immortality, but so few people are compatible with it that it might as well be worthless.
Finally, it’s time to fight the big bad boss, i.e. the Coffin Count of Storm, and her motivations are simple: she’s getting rid of the other Dark Lords because she wants order. She also wants Yashiro to be her knight. But how well does she truly know him? Sure, he’s talented, but he doesn’t seem like a very loyal or hard worker. By all means, recruit the most qualified candidate possible, but there’s a reason why companies put such an emphasis on “culture fit.” I know what the story is trying to say: there’s a thin line between a cynical mercenary for hire like Yashiro and one of Coffin Count of Storm’s top minions. So why not reap the benefits if he’s going to be an amoral killer anyway? On the other hand, it seems plainly obvious to me that Yashiro would never get along with someone like the Coffin Count of Storm, so this is all moot?
Regardless, there’s a reason why she’s a Dark Lord: she has the ability to control suits of armor and have them fight for her. Even though it’s technically a 4 on 1 — Yashiro and his apprentices against the big bad — they are easily overwhelmed and Indo even takes a blade through her thigh. I’m no doctor, but I feel like there’s gotta be some major artery or vein around that area. Buuuuuut if they didn’t bother killing any of the bad guys (except for the monstrous freak whose name I’ve already forgotten), then I doubt any of the girls will die either. Two episodes left, I think?
Akane-banashi Ep. 11
Alright, so why was Akane’s father expelled? Why couldn’t he continue pursuing his craft? It was simply because Issho didn’t think her father believed in himself. Even though he had the audience cheering for him, i.e. the results, Issho didn’t think the man had what it takes to bring rakugo back to its former heights. I don’t get it. I really, really don’t. First, it still doesn’t explain why expulsion was necessary. Tohru could’ve just kept training, kept honing his craft, take on feedback and keep striving to improve. Second, Tohru got the results. Was he “master” level or whatever? No. But results are results. You want rakugo to not be forgotten, but you throw away a guy who had the entire audience’s attention? Last but not least, there’s something to be said about being a true teacher, i.e. someone who builds their students up and not just criticize them. On all three levels, I find Issho nothing more than an irrational, cantankerous old man.
What follows next is the standard anime story arc: Akane doesn’t agree with Issho’s decision, and she will prove him wrong, blah blah blah. Personally, fuck Issho’s approval. But mainstream anime has never been about going against the grain and completely turning the system on its head. As such, I wouldn’t expect anything different from this show. Genuine subversion would have Akane succeed entirely without Issho’s validation, or have the show actually examine whether his criteria were ever legitimate. But we gotta conform!
We eventually learn that her father could’ve kept going if he wanted to. He was expelled from one school, but there are other schools. As I’m sitting here, hearing Shiguma reflect on his former apprentice, I was thinking, “Oh, maybe Tohru felt the need be more pragmatic and take on a regular 9-to-whatever unholy hours you gotta work as a salaryman.” But no, the real reason was that he wouldn’t even consider taking on any other master. So sentimental. Romantic, even. But really? You gave up on your dreams not because you have a wife and child to support, but because you’re attached to your master? To clarify, I’m not cheesed because he wasn’t loyal to the craft. Rather, it’s how he didn’t mind putting the financial burden on his wife to pursue his dreams, but the second he couldn’t do it with his chosen master, then poof, the passion for rakugo went away. I don’t get these men.
Ghost Concert – missing Songs Ep. 11
Odysseus shows up, who is apparently a woman? Shrug. The bad guys want to create a utopia through MiuCS, but like what the Shin Megami Tensei series has always taught us, doing so requires deleting human emotions. Now that we’ve redrawn our ideological lines in the sand for the umpteenth time, we can have a winners-take-all battle. Riku defects to the bad guys then just dies mid fight. I wish I could feel anything, but they never really developed her relationship with Rui. It was merely mentioned. Then Odysseus summons a cross…? The power of Christ compels you? But Seria and her gaggle of historical ghosts join forces to defeat Odysseus and… Christianity? Look, this show has never made a lick of sense, and it’s not going to start now in episode eleven.
In the end, Seria has one last song-off with MiuCS, so I guess get a happy ending. But Settei also dies, because… y’know what, it doesn’t matter.
One more episode left.
Mission: Yozakura Family S2 Ep. 10
Kyochiro has gone off on his own to try and confront the former heads of the Yozakura. Basically, Tsubomi has revived them to be her puppets, and so long as they’re alive, Mutsumi is in danger. Sounds tense, right? Well, the first half of the episode is anything but. Without Kyochiro around, everyone feels more relaxed, and the show really leans on this like it’s the funniest thing ever. Taiyo’s heart rate is down, Nanao doesn’t have to prevent Kyochiro from stealing Mutsumi’s hair samples, and even Goliath’s fur is shinier! Haha, so funny…
The second half of the episode gets back to being serious, so the family races against the clock to help Kyochiro out. But by the time they get there, he seemingly disintegrates right before their very eyes. Why? I dunno, maybe Tsubomi got her claws (or roots) into him. He might have defeated the puppeted former heads of the family, but at what cost? Personally, I hated his creepy clinginess, so good riddance. But ~~~family~~~, so I’m sure the rest of the Yozakuras will be very sad, and Taiyo will be super determined to save big bro Kyochiro and everything. Yeah, yeah, just get on with it. We’ll see what happens next week.
Wistoria: Wand and Sword S2 Ep. 10
The start of the episode emphasizes how much Will desperately wants to be by Elfie’s side. It has been his modus operandi since the start of the entire story. But I also know how this series operates, and it will do anything it can in order to maintain the status quo of yearning. God forbid Will and Elfie ever advance their relationship in any meaningful way. As a result, I’m stating it right now before I even watch another second of this episode: Will shall end up in another faction. He’ll prove his worth and succeed in the upcoming trial, but he’ll join another faction instead. I just know it. The author is stupid like that.
So… was I right? Sadly, I’ll have to wait until next week to find out. Basically, Will can produce his own Wiz now (it sounds stupid when you type it out), so he easily passes Kreutz’s challenge. Nevertheless, the director doth protest, and Elfie can appear biased (even though everyone already knows that she is). So Zeo comes up with another challenge: if Will can survive a lightning blast, then he has proven himself worthy. Naturally, Will succeeds here as well. So that’s settled, right? Elfie jumps into Will’s arms, and now they can be together forever, right? Nope, Zeo now wants Will and that’s where our episode ends. I haven’t been proven wrong. Elfie might try to fight for Will, but I bet you he still ends up with Zeo (or someone else). And then the series can continue with the same “will they, won’t they reunite” nonsense, because it’s bullshit like that. I dare the show to prove me wrong next week. Go on, do it. Personally, it’s win-win for me. Even if my prediction falls flat on its face, at least we break out of this tired, mundane narrative.
As an aside, we also find out that the witch is really just the headmaster in disguise. Okay, sure, whatever. Not really an interesting revelation.
Everything else about everything else:
I tried Link’s Awakening, but sadly, I didn’t really enjoy it. Seeing as how the game failed me, I finally decided to bite the bullet and fire up The Hundred Line. I had been waiting for a PS5 port, but I no longer think it’s coming. So fine, I’ll just play the damn game on my Switch (2). I’m not too far into the story yet, but I did audibly groan when the main character found himself locked in a classroom with a cast of colorful students! Oh boy, here we go again…
Here’s the thing, right? There are several kids trapped with you at a school, and they gotta defend said school against monsters. Naturally, not all of the kids are willing to fight. Some of them have perfectly good reasons for not wanting to fight. For example, one girl pukes whenever she gets nervous. Hey, totally valid. The last thing you wanna do in a life-or-death situation is upchucking your dinner. So what does the brilliant MC decide to do? He makes her a fashionable puke bag. A PUKE BAG. Like Danganronpa, you get free time that you can use to hang out with a character of your choice. You can give them gifts, build up the relationship, yadda yadda yadda. Where do you get said gifts? There’s a machine that allows you to craft them as long as you have the materials. So I’m thinking, “Oh, maybe he can make her some anti-nausea medication.” Even if this wasn’t really possible, I thought they could at least address it in one throwaway line or whatever. But no, the plan from the start was to make the girl a fucking pretty puke bag so she isn’t embarrassed when she pukes into it DURING BATTLE. Then what? Is she supposed to carry it with her while fighting? Wash it out later so she can keep reusing it? Granted, the puke bag alone doesn’t convince her to fight. The MC later tugs on her heartstrings by manipulatingreminding her that the monsters might destroy her grandpa’s auto shop. Still, the fact that we used a puke bag to segue to poor grandpa is insane to me. But maybe the problem is me. Maybe I’m just getting too old, and I just don’t find Kodaka’s quirky writing to be all that charming anymore.
Welp, I guess I should start previewing summer anime soon.