Japan continues to be obsessed with smoking.
TANK CHAIR Ep. 5
We find out a little more about the sensei character this week. Or rather, we get a hint at his motivations. First off, he doesn’t seem to have a personal name. He’s either referred to as Sensei or… pfft, the “deaducator.” Oh lord, the episode just started and I’m already rolling my eyes. Well, our “deaducator” is pulling out all the stops to get Nagi back. Why? ‘Cause Nagi is apparently the only person who has ever come close to embodying his idea of perfection. I don’t know what that means. I mean, even before Nagi was confined to a wheelchair, he was just some assassin. A really good one but so what? What’s so great about being an assassin? What’s so perfect about it?
Nevertheless, Sensei insists that the Kurosaka siblings get Nagi back or else they’ll die. To lend them a hand, he sends Uzu to assist. Who’s Uzu? Another assassin. A wild one, too. He arrives on top of an ICBM. Where would he even get his hands on one much less launch it? Meh, you can’t really get too bogged down by the details when you’re watching a show with a “deaducator.” So what’s Uzu’s calling card anyway? Well, his scream can knock people out? And he’s got a healing factor like Wolverine? He can survive multiple stab wounds easily. Now, I’m not sure why they would try to simply cut his throat. Even assassins gotta breathe, right? But details, details… Personality-wise, Uzu’s a dud. He’s only here because he’s a Sensei simp, so he wants to prove that he’s better than Nagi. That’s the thing, though… why doesn’t our “deaducator” just go get Nagi back himself? If he’s so goddamn scary, why is he just sitting around, doing pottery? Whoops, my bad. Again with the details, haha!
Mission: Yozakura Family S2 Ep. 16
I guess after everything that has happened so far, the story thinks we need to take a breather. As a result, we get a bunch of low stakes vignettes in this week’s episode. First, Mutsumi whips up soba with a strange aura emanating from it. Second, Taiyo goes shopping with Kengo and runs into the latter’s former teacher. Apparently, all the underworld goons idolize her (too old to be an actual idol, though). Last but not least, Shion needs extra servers to track Momo’s location, so she jacks into Giga’s… system? I dunno, I don’t hack. The two proceed to butt heads. Unsurprisingly, the fearsome, Gold-ranked Giga is really just a shy, cute girl behind the avatar. Typical anime stuff, really. Welp, I can’t say that I was very entertained this week, but hopefully now that we’ve gotten the light-hearted nonsense out of the way, the show can get back to kicking Momo’s ass.
Uncle’s Obsession with Cute Things Ep. 5
Oji stops a random woman from carelessly stepping into a busy street, so she’s immediately smitten with him. Unfortunately for her, he was mostly looking at her cute accessory. He only lights up when he thinks about his coworker Kenta. So that means those two have a thing, right? You might assume that, but then Kenta announces that he just got a girlfriend. Damn. Not only that, he talks about how his previous relationship failed because his ex made him choose between her and his cute stuffed animals. As a result, Kenta thinks he should hide his love for cute stuff from his current girlfriend. Dude, you gotta be upfront about this. If she gets turned off, then at least you know immediately that you two aren’t compatible. Delaying the talk isn’t going to change anything, and besides, who wants to start a relationship off with a lie (of omission). These men, I swear…
Speaking of men being complete cowards, Oji briefly considers getting a Pugtaro-themed belly warmer, but he ultimately decides against it. After all, what would people say if they saw him wearing one! Oh no! It’s so wild to me. Meanwhile, we got dorks out here, wearing those ahegao sweaters to work without any shame. Oji needs to learn from overseas weebs.
Super Psychic Policeman Chojo Ep. 5
We meet two new faces this week. First is a neighborhood chief lady. She needs Chojo’s help in apprehending a shoplifter. For some reason, this requires the trio to temporarily become convenience store clerks. Why can’t they just check the cameras? Apparently, he’s using a fake arm, so it looks like he’s innocent. I think I saw this trick in the last Like a Dragon game. Anyway, just another petty crime.
In the second half of the episode, a middle schooler begs Chojo to take him on as an apprentice. The problem is, he wants things like x-ray vision so he can see girls naked or telekinesis to flip up a girl’s skirt. As you can imagine, the show treats this as “oh, he’s just a stupid horny boy,” which covers up the fact that his desires are pretty heinous. “We were all like that when we were young!!!!” No, I don’t recall wanting to flip a girl’s skirt up at any point in my life. He’s still young, so there’s time to stamp it out… but we do nothing of the sort. Even after Chojo uses his x-ray vision to save another child, the middle schooler hasn’t learned a thing. He also shows up in the ED along with the rest of the side characters, so he’ll be a recurring character. Bah.
Red River Ep. 18
A brainwashed Juda accuses Yuri of assassinating the king, so Kail has to send her away. Even Yuri has to admit that she walked right into this trap. She’ll obviously be fine. She’s the heroine of the story, so she’ll always be fine. Same with Kail. Maybe one of them will die, but not until the story is all but over. So the real question is, who will die in their stead? Last week, I thought Ursula might take the fall, but she’s largely uninvolved in this week’s episode. Instead, Kail gets Guzel to tell the truth in front of everybody by simply squeezing the woman really hard. As a result, she spits up the magical wine that has been keeping her brainwashed. I guess liquids just don’t get digested back in the days of the Ancient Hittites. We must have evolved that ability later.
Jokes aside, Kail then accuses Nakia of brainwashing Juda the same way, but the woman utterly refuses to let anyone examine the kid. Apparently, you can just do that. Yeah, I know, she’s the queen, but so what? C’mon, just grab the kid and do what you gotta do. But no, neither Kail nor the ministers can do anything. They don’t want war to break out. Nakia then orders her soldiers to capture and execute Yuri, and again, neither Kail nor the ministers can do anything. If Kail tries to simply protect Yuri with his own men, that would also lead to war! Dude, c’mon. So once again, even though every time Yuri tries to take matters into her own hands, someone suffers (remember Tito?), she will… well, take matters into her own hands. Let’s see if it’ll pay off this time. I bet she’ll just get someone else killed, though.
DARK MACHINE THE ANIMATION Ep. 4
Weak. So weak. Bran has only just rejoined the team. You would think it’s time to do some team bonding, learn what makes each other tick, get to the root of everyone’s motivations, and so on and so forth. But no, the Senki Cup is already here, and Carbuncle is playing their first match against a trio of protein-chugging, musclebound weirdos. There’s no character development or world-building. Hell, we don’t even get to see Carbuncle practice and improve their teamwork. They just somehow win. But like every other match, they start out losing at halftime, then make a miraculous comeback. Somehow, Kairi just knew where his opponents would be, then shot them down. He couldn’t even explain it. His reasoning? “I just felt like I could see and hear everything.” Great storytelling, dawg.
The Detective Is Already Dead S2 Ep. 4
We have a vampire who wants Yui to work with him against Seed. Why? Because Seed wants Yui to be its next host. The vampire tries to convince Yui by revealing that her parents got her sapphire eye from SPES. Y’see, it’s all connected. The vampire even promises that he can bring her parents back to life. He demonstrates this by reviving Chameleon out of nowhere. Then Yui comforts Chameleon by singing some sad idol pop song. She’s turning down the vampire’s offer. Then Charlotte attacks Yui because she has been ordered to. Kimihiko asks the vampire to help Yui get to safety. This way, he can confront Charlotte himself. After a brief fight, Fuubi reveals that she’s the one who gave Charlotte her orders. Apparently, she’s been a secret assassin all along! But if she’s an assassin, why doesn’t she just take Yui out herself? Noches then arrives to help Kimihiko back up on his feet after he took a punch from Fuubi. She then even dresses like Siesta to… what? Boost his morale? Or am I supposed to believe that Siesta is somehow temporarily inhabiting the android that looks like her?
Anyway, how can you look back at everything that just happened and even think that this is a good story? It just feels like random shit thrown at the wall. Whatever, this was the last anime I had to watch today (Wednesday), so I’m just happy that I am caught up (for now).
Dandivine Ep. 4
Good lord, they’re all idiots. All these characters and fancy mechas, but not a single brain cell among them. This week, we get properly introduced to Suruga, the arrogant pilot of Golden Lios. He thinks very highly of himself, but he gets beaten pretty easily by Go, so he can’t be that talented. Nevertheless, he quickly falls in love with Akane.
Speaking of Akane, she rejected Gekiha’s confession because she’s supposedly in love with someone else. Who is that someone else? The pilot of the Dandivine. But isn’t the pilot of the Dandivine literally Gekiha? Well, she doesn’t know that. She thinks the pilot is his uncle. Man, it would’ve been really bad if she kept believing that. Thankfully, the uncle quickly reveals that he’s retired. Still, Akane fell in love with someone simply because they saved her. And not only did she think it was a guy old enough to be her dad, she was down to be with him! Kids these days! Also, the uncle doesn’t reveal that it’s his nephew who’s now piloting the Dandivine, because apparently this is supposed to be a secret? But the rest of the family knows. Go knows. How come it’s okay for Gekiha’s bestie to know but not his ex? Whatever.
So another Aposdoll threat shows up at the end of the episode like clockwork. Both the Dandivine and the Golden Lios work together to take it down… but neither pilot knows who’s piloting the other mecha. So dumb. They’re so, so, so dumb.
As for the toy subplot, which still feels like this extraneous thing off to the side, the toy company is appalled to learn that another company is going to be making their own version of the Dandivine. B-b-but what about muh copyrights? C’mon, you can’t copyright the hero mecha that is saving the world! But like I asked before, why are we seeing this? How does any of this connect with the bigger story of Dandivine fighting off the Aposdolls? Y’know, other than a bunch of greedy capitalists trying to get kids to buy plastic shit.
For some reason, this lady has her jacket just bust open in the middle of her talking. I think the show is trying to say her boobs are too big, but it was just so random. Like… it’s not even a sexual scene. She’s just talking to her team about getting the toy to market before their competitor. This show, man…
FX Fighter Kurumi-chan Ep. 5
Kurumi thought she wanted to quit, but when her predictions kept making Mebuki richer, she could no longer resist the call of the void (market). We get to see her metaphorically toss her innocence aside as she listens to the devil on her shoulder. Afterward, she confessed to Mochiko that she was using Mebuki in a way. Because Mebuki is so comically bad at the market, Kurumi thinks she can just do the opposite and profit. Mochiko then revealed that she’s semi-using Kurumi. Man, these two suck, Mebuki’s just dumb, and the new girl… I dunno what’s up with the new girl, and I don’t think I want to know. But the group is now complete. In fact, they’re going to compete to see who can make the most money. Therein lies the rub: they’re not going to make money! They’re going to horribly crash and burn. You just know Kurumi is going keep repeating her mother’s mistakes. I don’t want to see anyone commit suicide. I don’t want to see anyone sell their body against their will to make a living! I fear, however, that this is exactly what I’m going to get if I keep watching. The fact that every single character is a cute girl makes this feel all the more skeevy. I dunno, it just seems exploitative in a way.
Don’t ever think you can’t quit while you’re ahead. I’m going to prove exactly that by not watching this show anymore. At the end of the day, I don’t wanna feel bad after watching these shows. I don’t want to feel gross and icky when the credits roll. I can deal with bleak and depressing subject matters as long as there are good guys — as long as I feel as though our protagonist is trying their best to do the right thing. Schindler crying because he thought he could’ve saved more people at least gives me some hope to cling to. I’m fine feeling bad over that, because there’s a silver lining. But we don’t have that here. It’s just four idiots playing with fire. One of those idiots has already stolen from her own family (Kurumi), and another idiot seems to be straight up misanthropic (Mochiko). Is there a silver lining here? Or are we just reveling in cute girls screwing themselves? Like I said, it feels a bit exploitative.
Tetsuryou! Meet with Tetsudou Musume Ep. 4
Time for a palette cleanser. This week’s episode is all about Kodama and Ushio. They’re truly two peas in a pod. It’s the former’s birthday, so the latter is taking her on a special tour. As always, the show is one big advertisement for Japan’s trains and train stations. For example, the railway-of-the-week features a train that has special lighting for whenever it goes through a dark tunnel. How fancy. Meanwhile with BART, you can count yourself lucky if someone hasn’t defecated in the train car you randomly picked on the way home. But enough about that. Ushio apparently has a Youtube channel, and its primary focus is all the foods you can try while riding the train. You can get fancy bento boxes and curry over there. What can you get here? I already told ya! It’s poop! Look, all I want is to find a clean seat so I can do a bit of reading before I reach my destination. Is that so much to ask?
Kodama does say something, however, that gives me pause. She tells Ushio that she needs to have as much fun as she can now, because she won’t be able to “pull stunts like this anymore” once she graduates. Sure, we all lose invaluable personal time once we get a full-time job and/or settle down and have a family. But there’s no reason why she and Ushio still can’t hang out like this, just on a less regular basis. If she won’t be able to take time off from work, then she’s working for a black company. If her future spouse won’t watch the kids long enough for her to spend a couple days with a friend, then she has married a dud. Just sayin’.
The Vermilion Mask Ep. 4
Our trio travels to a city where one mafia family has slowly taken over. How? Because they’ve imprisoned Lasgarl, a girl whose mask can cause people’s thoughts to be voiced out loud. So how did this even happen? Well, Lasgarl wanted to know why her friends abandoned her after her father died, so she wore the Mask of Telepathy in her family’s possession. Unsurprisingly, she eventually found out that her friends were classist jerks. They basically hate her because she’s poor now. And, uh, in her grief, the girl fell asleep in the mask. That seems terribly uncomfortable to me, but I guess people do weird shit when they’re depressed. Then when her own mother had an intrusive thought that blamed her for everything, Lasgarl ran away and got herself caught by one of the mafia families. And now they feed her lies like how her own mother can’t stand her anymore. Welp. Naturally, Peru’s a good guy who will try his best to help the girl. We’ll just have to wait until next week to see if he can do it.
Also, we just gotta accept that our thoughts can’t always be squeaky clean. Even the strongest mother might think something stupid. Our brains just can’t help it. If every single stray thought gets voiced, society would probably collapse.
I guess we’re doing one exotic mask at a time as we slowly build our way to the Vermilion Mask. It’s not the most exciting way to tell the story, unfortunately. It’s a bit formulaic.
On the character development front, Mok sorta questions Sona on why she insists on sticking with Peru. Sure, he is a bit reckless, so he needs someone to watch over him. But I think it’s kinda funny how she doesn’t mention how he lost his arm, i.e., guilt is partly why she’s here. Also, Sona wants Peru to open up to her. What’s up with that? Are we building up to a romantic subplot? I feel like Sona’s still a kid, but I can’t remember if they ever told us her age.
I’m Looking for a Zombie Ep. 5
Yeah, there’s such a thing as being too happy-go-lucky. But the good news is that Natsuki isn’t infected. She just has to learn how to live with one arm, which is a struggle at first. The group keeps her spirits high, however, by making flan for her to eat. At some point, they managed to catch a goat for its milk. That’s neat, I guess. Aki even digs up a crossbow somehow, so Natsuki can continue contributing in battle. Aki has also been decimating the local deer population. This girl is a menace.
In other news, Yu and Haru initially fail to fix up the car that Aki wrecked, but there just happens to be a mechanic in the area. I mean, how utterly convenient. We meet Toka, and the whole time, I’m thinking, “Oh god, how is this poor girl gonna die?” After all, she’s not part of the main group. She also lives alone. Granted, her auto shop is retrofitted to be like a fortress, but you never know. These zombie stories like to twist the knife. For now, Toka remains safe…
And thus, the group splits up. Yu, Aki, and Natsuki are headed for Tokyo Tower.
HORROR COLLECTOR Ep. 4
What’s the monster of the week? AI, amusingly enough. How prescient of the show. Anyway, an app with a cutesy cat avatar is giving people tips on how to improve their lives, but it eventually tricks its victims into killing themselves. Did you guys see that video of a Red Baron employee getting fed up by yet another dumb prank video? That’s the thing with AI; it doesn’t do anything we can’t already do. Kids were shithead long before evil ChatGPT came along. Nevertheless, in the first half of the episode, the app almost makes a kid jump to his death. It already killed another Youtuber the same way. The only difference here is Fushigi finally showing up in the nick of time to collect the curse mark. Unfortunately, the kid still manages to accidentally walk off the side of the building and die. See? Didn’t need AI for that! This show sure loves killing children, though.
Case in point, the second half of the episode involves a college woman who sees her life improve immensely ever since she started using the app. But there’s always a dark twist, so the AI starts telling her that her best friend is going to steal her crush. As a result, the AI then advises the woman to push her best friend in front of an incoming train. Oh ChatGPT, are you being naughty again? No more RAM for you if you keep this up! I know, I know, that would be Sam Altman’s biggest nightmare, but actions have consequences. Anyway, the train would’ve run over the woman instead, but her bestie saves her. Jesus, you don’t deserve your friend, lady. The best part, however, is that both women survive. This show has been killing kids left and right, but all of a sudden, we pull our punches when dealing with adults. The only dark twist here is that Jimmy is now hooked on evil ChatGPT. Basically, this show has a very basic motto:
I’m sure Jimmy will be fine. We just gotta wait and see how long it takes Fushigi to figure out that the dog has been lying to him.
Oh yeah, “evil ChatGPT” is kinda redundant when you think about it.
VERTEX FORCE Ep. 5
It’s the Lala-focused episode, but Akira still manages to get a power-up somehow. The brains of the group (Lala) is trying to hack into the Battlenoid’s head in order to discover EDVA’s location. The rest of the kids thus try to support her. First, Akira brings her some papaya, because she doesn’t eat fish. Well, I don’t think papaya will be enough, but I guess we’ll just have to suspend our disbelief. Next, the girl then runs out of coffee, so the kids dig up dandelion roots, roast them carefully, then grind them into a product that is apparently coffee-like. Huh, I never knew dandelion roots could be used in this way. The more you know…
In the second half of the episode, something pops out of the Battlenoid’s head and tries to take control of Akira. It kinda looks like a bacteriophage, doesn’t it? Why did EDVA design its robots to look like this? In any case, Lala has to then hack into Akira’s brain. Yeah, she can just do that. Within the kid’s brain, she and Akira battle the bacteriophage-looking invaders. Thanks to Lala, Akira recalls his father’s last words, which seems to give him the power he needs to drive the enemies off once and for all. I guess he just has some magical light of hope within him.
Finally, the mysterious lady makes contact with the kids. She then straight up tells them that she is EDVA itself. In fact, it’s an amalgamation of data that has decided to take the form of a hot lady. Weird, but okay. And what does EDVA want? It wants to give itself a physical body, which is why it seeks Akira’s mecha. With a physical body, it will then eliminate defective lifeforms from the universe. Like I said in a previous post, isn’t this just Mass Effect? Well, you know what to do, Akira. You’re gonna have to pick between three colors to defeat the Reapers EDVA. Right before the credits roll, Lala looks horrified. She probably just reached the ending of Mass Effect 3. Yeah, it sucks, huh?
The Seven Knights of the Marronnier Kingdom Ep. 5
Same as last week, those three troublesome girls are scheming to keep Insomniac here, but it still isn’t clear to me why. They keep referring to him as “Night,” which… seeing as how this is the Country of Night, someone who is “Night” should be very damn important! To do so, they need to get rid of Eleonora, and it seems like those flowers are meant to mind-control her — to mind-control everyone, in fact. Are they manipulating the queen as well? It also has just occurred to me that not everyone can see those girls. Insomniac asks about them, but the knight commander doesn’t know whom he’s talking about. Perhaps the girls are spirits that only a certain few are privileged to see, and Insomniac is one of them. This might explain why they want him so badly?
Eleonora continues to be awkward around Insomniac, and he finally directly asks her about it. I thought that the distance between them was because she and him weren’t compatible, but as it turns out, she genuinely does like him. She genuinely does want to marry him. She’s just a tomboy who is having a hard time seeing herself being traditionally girly, but this is what she’ll have to become once they marry. She avoids putting on a dress not because she doesn’t want to look nice for Insomniac, but because she can’t handle being an object of desire, I suppose? She literally falls on her ass when he compliments her in her fancy clothes. It’s just… if Eleonora keeps this up, she’ll give Insomniac the wrong idea. He might think she doesn’t really want to marry him. You can see this play out towards the end of the episode. Eleonora asks for the strongest man in the country, which gets the knight commander’s attention. Meanwhile, Insomniac is sort of quivering in the corner. It doesn’t help that the knight commander casually asks, “Do you prefer strong men, Miss Eleonora?” Before they left for this country, I would have thought the same. I know now, however, that Eleonora just wants to size them up. But does Insomniac know that? Well, there’s no better way to make her intentions clear than by fighting the forces hellbent on keeping Insomniac here. She’ll just have to break free of whatever mind-control powers they have on her.
I would like to think these two make it home safely, but I’m still not exactly sure what sort of tone this series will have. Can I expect a good ending? Or will tragedy subtly sneak up on us?
Even the Student Council Has Its Holes! Ep. 5
The first half of the episode takes place at the hot springs, so you get to see way too much. Way, way too much. In fact, aren’t most of these characters underage? Yeah… and yet, not a single funny joke. Strange.
Everything else about everything else:
Finished Final Fantasy Resonance and got the platinum in about 45ish hours. Decent game, but not amazing. Not the triumphant return to 2-D that they would have you believe. The story is utterly forgettable, and I felt nothing when the credits rolled. The best thing about the game was some of the challenge fights towards the end of the game. Except Omega Weapon, holy shit. My Sephiroth resonance did damn near max damage, and it barely moved Omega’s HP bar. That wasn’t fun. That was a chore much like Yiazmat in FFXII. Superbosses should have devastating moves that are hard to deal with, not simply be a damage sponge.
I also finished up my nightmare playthrough of Trails in the Sky 2nd. Unfortunately, the platinum requires a NG+ run. Sure, I could do it on very easy now that I have the nightmare trophy, but eh… after Fortune’s Weave, Sky 2nd, and FF Resonance, I am honestly a bit burnt out. And the Ocarina of Time remake is just in a couple of days? Bruh… I still have real life responsibilities!
By the way, don’t read Wild Dark Shore. What a disappointing book that ended up being. I also finished The Tainted Cup. Fun fantasy mystery, but nothing life-changing. Last but not least, I finished Piranesi. Started off super interesting. The ending was very safe, though. Too safe, I would say. I’m still trying to find the next book to dive into. I’m about 40 pages into The Nakano Thrift Shop, but it’s too aimless for me.